DISCUSSION FORUMS
MAIN MENU
Home
Help
Advanced Search
Recent Posts
Site Statistics
Who's Online
Forum Rules
Bible Resources
• Bible Study Aids
• Bible Devotionals
• Audio Sermons
Community
• ChristiansUnite Blogs
• Christian Forums
• Facebook Apps
Web Search
• Christian Family Sites
• Top Christian Sites
• Christian RSS Feeds
Family Life
• Christian Finance
• ChristiansUnite KIDS
Shop
• Christian Magazines
• Christian Book Store
Read
• Christian News
• Christian Columns
• Christian Song Lyrics
• Christian Mailing Lists
Connect
• Christian Singles
• Christian Classifieds
Graphics
• Free Christian Clipart
• Christian Wallpaper
Fun Stuff
• Clean Christian Jokes
• Bible Trivia Quiz
• Online Video Games
• Bible Crosswords
Webmasters
• Christian Guestbooks
• Banner Exchange
• Dynamic Content

Subscribe to our Free Newsletter.
Enter your email address:

ChristiansUnite
Forums
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
November 02, 2024, 01:23:38 PM

Login with username, password and session length
Search:     Advanced search
Our Lord Jesus Christ loves you.
287005 Posts in 27572 Topics by 3790 Members
Latest Member: Goodwin
* Home Help Search Login Register
+  ChristiansUnite Forums
|-+  Entertainment
| |-+  Laughter (Good Medicine) (Moderator: admin)
| | |-+  Laughter - Good Medicine
« previous next »
Pages: 1 ... 94 95 [96] 97 98 ... 192 Go Down Print
Author Topic: Laughter - Good Medicine  (Read 451054 times)
Soldier4Christ
Global Moderator
Gold Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 61141


One Nation Under God


View Profile
« Reply #1425 on: October 15, 2006, 09:07:23 AM »

Out of the eater came forth meat, and out of the strong came forth sweetness.


Logged

Joh 9:4  I must work the works of him that sent me, while it is day: the night cometh, when no man can work.
nChrist
Global Moderator
Gold Member
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 64256


May God Lead And Guide Us All


View Profile
« Reply #1426 on: October 22, 2006, 11:14:42 AM »

7 reasons not to mess with children (Email From TalkerCat)

1. A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.

The teacher said it was Physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.

The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.

Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".

The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"

The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".
______________________________

2. A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.

As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.

The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."

The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."

Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl: replied, "They will in a minute."
______________________________

3. A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.

After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"

Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."
______________________________

4. One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.

She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"

Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."

The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"
______________________________

5. The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture .

"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's  Michael, He's a doctor.'

A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."
______________________________

6. A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."

"Yes," the class said.

"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"

A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."
______________________________

7. The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic Elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:

"Take only ONE. God is watching."

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip Cookies.

A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.
Logged

airIam2worship
Global Moderator
Gold Member
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 8947


Early In The Morning I Will Praise The Lord


View Profile
« Reply #1427 on: October 22, 2006, 04:03:22 PM »

This might sound corny to you all, but it's the honest truth. My daughter announced to me and her father about 2 weeks ago that she was failing math, but at least , according to her she 'wasn't failing with an F... in fact it was an upper D'. True to her word she failed math and bought home a D. My husband told her she needed to study her math for one hour every day until the next report card. Well after going in her room and studying for a few minutes she came back out and announced very proudly. "Mommy, Daddy I studied for 10 minutes and I know everything now!Grin Grin Grin

Funny thing is she was dead serious! She hought she knew everything   Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin

We tested her using life's toughest situations she failed!!!!!  Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin
Logged

PS 91:2 I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in Him will I trust
Hary
Newbie
*
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 47



View Profile
« Reply #1428 on: October 26, 2006, 07:07:44 AM »

That is so cute and so mean!!!

Logged

1 Timothy 4:12
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
airIam2worship
Global Moderator
Gold Member
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 8947


Early In The Morning I Will Praise The Lord


View Profile
« Reply #1429 on: October 26, 2006, 07:15:24 AM »

Hary, I am in my late 50's, I have 14 grandchildren, 4 children of my own and my two step daughters, that I've been raising for 8 years, and I STILL don't know everything  Roll Eyes Shocked
Logged

PS 91:2 I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in Him will I trust
Hary
Newbie
*
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 47



View Profile
« Reply #1430 on: November 03, 2006, 08:11:54 AM »

I don't think we will ever know everything  Wink
Logged

1 Timothy 4:12
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
airIam2worship
Global Moderator
Gold Member
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 8947


Early In The Morning I Will Praise The Lord


View Profile
« Reply #1431 on: November 03, 2006, 08:27:35 AM »

But she did she studied for 10 minutes  Grin Grin Grin Grin
Logged

PS 91:2 I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in Him will I trust
Tolorah
Full Member
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 144



View Profile
« Reply #1432 on: November 03, 2006, 10:26:15 PM »

hmmmmz i think that she just may have been talking about a different everythign there!!!
Logged

A calm sea does not make a skilled sailor
willychuck
Guest
« Reply #1433 on: November 05, 2006, 08:30:07 PM »

I love the sincerety of our kids.   Cheesy

Bill
Logged
willychuck
Guest
« Reply #1434 on: November 05, 2006, 08:32:06 PM »

But God, I've been studying this for hours, days, weeks, months, well, maybe years.  I just know I'm right this time.    Grin

Bill
Logged
airIam2worship
Global Moderator
Gold Member
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 8947


Early In The Morning I Will Praise The Lord


View Profile
« Reply #1435 on: November 07, 2006, 07:36:42 AM »

I could be a stand up comedian just by repeating the things she says, but according to her I wouldn't be able to sit down ever, cause that would make me a sit down comedian.  Undecided  Lips Sealed  Grin
Logged

PS 91:2 I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in Him will I trust
Tolorah
Full Member
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 144



View Profile
« Reply #1436 on: November 07, 2006, 11:45:54 PM »

I could be a stand up comedian just by repeating the things she says, but according to her I wouldn't be able to sit down ever, cause that would make me a sit down comedian.  Undecided  Lips Sealed  Grin


ROFL!!!!!  Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy Thats so cute!!!!
Logged

A calm sea does not make a skilled sailor
Soldier4Christ
Global Moderator
Gold Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 61141


One Nation Under God


View Profile
« Reply #1437 on: November 22, 2006, 02:22:49 PM »

My son heard a noise in the house real early this morning that woke him up. He got up to see what was going on. My grandson was up and roaming around the house. My son asked his son what he was doing up. His response was "I saw the light! I saw the Light!"

(He had seen a car's headlights shining in his window and thought it was the sun. The manner in which he said it my son had thought he had spiritual experience.)

Logged

Joh 9:4  I must work the works of him that sent me, while it is day: the night cometh, when no man can work.
nChrist
Global Moderator
Gold Member
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 64256


May God Lead And Guide Us All


View Profile
« Reply #1438 on: November 22, 2006, 08:32:02 PM »

 Grin   Grin

It's wonderful to have the little ones home. You really never know what they're going to say and do. I think that you almost have to be there to really enjoy it. I'll share one from my 3 year old. He and the rest of the family boarded the plane early because they had small children. The pilot came out to visit for a minute and ask the 3 year old if he was going to have turkey tomorrow. He said, "No, I'm having pa-sketti". With two grandmas, and two great-grandmas present, he'll probably get "pa-sketti" if that's what he really wants.   Grin

The rest of us are having turkey!   Grin
« Last Edit: November 22, 2006, 08:40:25 PM by blackeyedpeas » Logged

Soldier4Christ
Global Moderator
Gold Member
*****
Offline Offline

Posts: 61141


One Nation Under God


View Profile
« Reply #1439 on: November 22, 2006, 08:55:12 PM »

Quote
With two grandmas, and two great-grandmas present, he'll probably get "pa-sketti" if that's what he really wants.

Yep and that is the way it works here, too. Tomorrow we'll be having all the grandkids together and there will probably be a different meal fixed for each of them if they don't want turkey.

Logged

Joh 9:4  I must work the works of him that sent me, while it is day: the night cometh, when no man can work.
Pages: 1 ... 94 95 [96] 97 98 ... 192 Go Up Print 
« previous next »
Jump to:  



More From ChristiansUnite...    About Us | Privacy Policy | | ChristiansUnite.com Site Map | Statement of Beliefs



Copyright © 1999-2019 ChristiansUnite.com. All rights reserved.
Please send your questions, comments, or bug reports to the

Powered by SMF 1.1 RC2 | SMF © 2001-2005, Lewis Media