What is "Gossip"?

[sincereheart]

gos·sip [ góssip ]
 
noun  (plural gos·sips)
 
1. conversation about personal matters: conversation about personal or intimate rumors or facts, especially when malicious
 
2. casual conversation: informal and chatty conversation or writing about recent and often personal events
 
3. habitual talker: somebody given to spreading personal or intimate information about other people

spread rumors: to tell people rumors or personal or intimate facts about other people, especially maliciously

http://encarta.msn.com/dictionary_/gossip.html

Wow! It doesn't have to be a lie to be gossip! Sounds like it's telling somebody's business to someone else!

[sincereheart]

Innocent Gossip?

~by Taprina K. Milburn

My friends surrounded me at a cozy table. We hadn't been together in years. Immediately we reverted to the chatty group of teenagers we had once been.

One friend told about a classmate's divorce. "It was nasty. His wife took everything," she said. We listened, drawn in by someone else's misery. My friend acted as if she knew the whole story, both sides.

But did she? Who cared? This was good stuff.

Where's the harm?

An occasional hour of gossip with the girls isn't so bad -- or is it? I'd never given much thought to gossip's harm as I participated, both listening and spreading. When I passed on information I'd heard about someone, I didn't care if the tidbit was true or hurtful. And I didn't think about how untrustworthy I appeared to other people who heard me gossip.

In recent years, an unusual circumstance brought the subject of gossip into a different light. An acquaintance began spewing unsolicited information about a dear friend to me. As she divulged secrets, I was put in a position to make a decision: Should I ask her to stop talking, or should I listen to the criticism and exaggerations? Would she be offended if I asked her to stop?

"The person you're talking about is my friend," I blurted. "I can't listen to this."

Stunned, the gossip looked at her watch. We said goodbye with a great deal of discomfort. We haven't said much to each other since.

This incident brought to me another question: Should I listen only to gossip about and criticism of people I don't know or don't like? Or do I have to stop participating completely?

Do not conform any longer.

At a conference several years ago, I listened to a speaker talk about the hate she saw among Christians as they tore one another down instead of building one another up. James 3:9 came to mind as I listened to her: "With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness."

Gossip and destructive criticism are common in our society. They're on television and in the newspapers. But we don't have to turn on the TV or pick up a paper to get a dose. It's in our homes, churches and businesses, too.

Christine works for a large corporation. Her challenge each day is to keep out of the gossip circle at work.

I'll admit that I'm occasionally yanked back into it," she said. "I know as soon as I start to listen or open my mouth that I've become part of the problem. Many times, when I feel I've walked away from it, I'll return to my desk and find on my computer an e-mail that's full of gossip. It's every where, and it makes building friendships at work difficult because you don't know whom you can trust.

Cutting the gossip habit may be like weaning a baby from its pacifier: You'll feel a little unsure about what to do with your mouth in certain situations. In her book, Lord, Change Me! Evelyn Christenson writes, "I find it is impossible to pray for and gossip about a person at the same time. I can't thank God for all the good things about a person and be filled with accusations at the same time."

Kathy, a teacher's assistant, says she purposely starts her day with a commitment to God that she will avoid gossip.

"My goal each day is to refrain from talking bad about anybody or overly complain about bad situations," she says. "I also have to make sure my mind is free of criticism. If I really feel that I need to share some information with someone about another person, I think first about what my purpose and motive are for sharing it."

In my journey to prevent myself from gossiping, I've learned some things about myself.

* A gossip may be fun to listen to, but she can't be trusted enough to build intimate relationships with.

* No matter how jolly a person seems, gossip and criticism reveal on the outside what's going on in the inside -- negative thinking and hatred.

* Gossip and criticism are used to make us feel better about our positions in life -- we feel good when someone else is worse off.

* Criticism of other people will eventually spill over into my own family. The more I see wrong in people with whom I work or mingle, the more critical my eyes become at home.

* Gossip and criticism pull down your spirit. "Garbage in, garbage out," a friend's mother used to say. Listening to gossip can be as harmful as speaking it. It changes the way you look at and feel about people.

Damage control.

This anonymous quote is tacked to my bulletin board, and it reminds me to keep a rein on my tongue: "A gossip is a person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do as much damage." Here are a few pointers.

* Make a commitment with your circle of friends to lift up people instead of tearing them down.

* Firmly tell the messenger you do not want to hear gossip. Be prepared for the relationship to change.

* Examine what you fill your mind with. Does your mental diet consist of tell-all books, despondent music or television programs that portray the most sinister side of human behavior?

* Choose friends carefully. The special part of friendship is being able to confide in each other during rough times. This is unsafe if your friend is known to gossip. If you're a known gossip, people will not trust you.

* Make it a daily goal to think before you say something about someone. Ask yourself: What is my motivation?

I still keep in touch with my friends from childhood, but we no longer keep the gossip flame burning. Our friendships have grown deeper since we've shelved negativity. We're now able to have conversations about things with substance -- family and faith.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Taken from Focus on the Family magazine, Feb. 2000.
Taprina K. Milburn is a stay-at-home mom of two children: Aubrey, 6, and Brenner, 3. She has been married to Kermit for 10 years.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Copyright © 2000 Focus on the Family.
All rights reserved. International copyright secured.

[sincereheart]

NIV:
Proverbs 11:13
A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy man keeps a secret.

Proverbs 16:28
A perverse man stirs up dissension, and a gossip separates close friends.

Proverbs 18:8
The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to a man's inmost parts.

Proverbs 20:19
A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a man who talks too much.

Proverbs 26:20
Without wood a fire goes out; without gossip a quarrel dies down.

Proverbs 26:22
The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to a man's inmost parts.

Romans 1:29
They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips,

2 Corinthians 12:20
For I am afraid that when I come I may not find you as I want you to be, and you may not find me as you want me to be. I fear that there may be quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, factions, slander, gossip, arrogance and disorder.

1 Timothy 5:13
Besides, they get into the habit of being idle and going about from house to house. And not only do they become idlers, but also gossips and busybodies, saying things they ought not to.

3 John 1:10
So if I come, I will call attention to what he is doing, gossiping maliciously about us.

[sincereheart]

MSG:
Exodus 23:1
"Don't pass on malicious gossip. "Don't link up with a wicked person and give corrupt testimony.

Leviticus 19:16
"Don't spread gossip and rumors. "Don't just stand by when your neighbor's life is in danger. I am GOD.

Job 5:21
You'll be protected from vicious gossip and live fearless through any catastrophe.

Job 15:4
Look at you! You trivialize religion, turn spiritual conversation into empty gossip.

Job 31:34
Because I was afraid what people would say, fearing the gossip of the neighbors so much That I turned myself into a recluse? You know good and well that I didn't.


Psalm 31:13
The street-talk gossip has me "criminally insane"! Behind locked doors they plot how to ruin me for good.

Psalm 31:20
You hide them safely away from the opposition. As you slam the door on those oily, mocking faces, you silence the poisonous gossip.

Psalm 35:20
No good is going to come from that crowd; They spend all their time cooking up gossip against those who mind their own business.

Psalm 41:6
If someone comes to see me, he mouths empty platitudes, All the while gathering gossip about me to entertain the street-corner crowd.

Psalm 44:16
Gossip and ridicule fill the air, people out to get me crowd the street.

Psalm 52:4
You love malicious gossip, you foul-mouth.

Psalm 63:11
But the king is glad in God; his true friends spread the joy, While small-minded gossips are gagged for good.

Psalm 69:26
They gossiped about the one you disciplined, Made up stories about anyone wounded by God.

Psalm 70:3
Give them a taste of their own medicine, those gossips off clucking their tongues.

Psalm 71:11
The gossip is: "God has abandoned him. Pounce on him now; no one will help him."

Psalm 101:5
I put a gag on the gossip who bad-mouths his neighbor; I can't stand arrogance.

Psalm 112:7
Unfazed by rumor and gossip, Heart ready, trusting in GOD,

Psalm 119:23
While bad neighbors maliciously gossip about me, I'm absorbed in pondering your wise counsel.

Proverbs 4:24
Don't talk out of both sides of your mouth; avoid careless banter, white lies, and gossip.

Proverbs 11:13
A gadabout gossip can't be trusted with a secret, but someone of integrity won't violate a confidence.

Proverbs 12:13
The gossip of bad people gets them in trouble; the conversation of good people keeps them out of it.

Proverbs 16:27
Mean people spread mean gossip; their words smart and burn.

Proverbs 16:28
Troublemakers start fights; gossips break up friendships.

Proverbs 17:4
Evil people relish malicious conversation; the ears of liars itch for dirty gossip.

Proverbs 18:8
Listening to gossip is like eating cheap candy; do you really want junk like that in your belly?

Proverbs 20:19
Gossips can't keep secrets, so never confide in blabbermouths.

Proverbs 24:28
Don't talk about your neighbors behind their backs-- no slander or gossip, please.

Proverbs 25:23
A north wind brings stormy weather, and a gossipy tongue stormy looks.

Proverbs 26:20
When you run out of wood, the fire goes out; when the gossip ends, the quarrel dies down.

Proverbs 26:22
Listening to gossip is like eating cheap candy; do you want junk like that in your belly?

Proverbs 29:12
When a leader listens to malicious gossip, all the workers get infected with evil.

Ecclesiastes 7:21
Don't eavesdrop on the conversation of others. What if the gossip's about you and you'd rather not hear it?

Ecclesiastes 10:20
Don't bad-mouth your leaders, not even under your breath, And don't abuse your betters, even in the privacy of your home. Loose talk has a way of getting picked up and spread around. Little birds drop the crumbs of your gossip far and wide.

Isaiah 58:9
Then when you pray, GOD will answer. You'll call out for help and I'll say, "Here I am.' "If you get rid of unfair practices, quit blaming victims, quit gossiping about other people's sins,

Jeremiah 9:4
"Be wary of even longtime neighbors. Don't even trust your grandmother! Brother schemes against brother, like old cheating Jacob. Friend against friend spreads malicious gossip.

Jeremiah 48:27
Wasn't it you, Moab, who made crude jokes over Israel? And when they were caught in bad company, didn't you cluck and gossip and snicker?

Lamentations 3:61
"You heard, GOD, their vicious gossip, their behind-my-back plots to ruin me.

Ezekiel 36:3
now here is a prophecy in the name of GOD, the Master: Because nations came at you from all sides, ripping and plundering, hauling pieces of you off every which way, and you've become the butt of cheap gossip and jokes,

Micah 1:10
Don't gossip about this in Telltown. Don't waste your tears. In Dustville, roll in the dust.

Matthew 9:4
Jesus knew what they were thinking, and said, "Why this gossipy whispering?

Matthew 9:23
By now they had arrived at the house of the town official, and pushed their way through the gossips looking for a story and the neighbors bringing in casseroles.

Mark 5:38
They entered the leader's house and pushed their way through the gossips looking for a story and neighbors bringing in casseroles.

Mark 5:39
Jesus was abrupt: "Why all this busybody grief and gossip? This child isn't dead; she's sleeping."

Luke 5:22
Jesus knew exactly what they were thinking and said, "Why all this gossipy whispering?

Acts 17:21
Downtown Athens was a great place for gossip. There were always people hanging around, natives and tourists alike, waiting for the latest tidbit on most anything.

2 Corinthians 12:16
And why is it that I keep coming across these whiffs of gossip about how my self-support was a front behind which I worked an elaborate scam? Where's the evidence?

Ephesians 5:4
Though some tongues just love the taste of gossip, Christians have better uses for language than that. Don't talk dirty or silly. That kind of talk doesn't fit our style. Thanksgiving is our dialect.

1 Timothy 1:6
Those who fail to keep to this point soon wander off into cul-de-sacs of gossip.

1 Timothy 5:13
frittering away their days on empty talk, gossip, and trivialities.

Titus 2:3
Guide older women into lives of reverence so they end up as neither gossips nor drunks, but models of goodness.

[Shylynne]

I find it is impossible to pray for and gossip about a person at the same time.

Now that struck home.

Thanks for these sincereheart!

[sincereheart]

NASB:
Proverbs 20:19
He who [Prov 11:13] goes about as a slanderer reveals secrets, Therefore do not associate with [Prov 13:3] a gossip.

Romans 1:29
being filled with all unrighteousness, wickedness, greed, evil; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, malice; they are [2 Cor 12:20] gossips,

2 Corinthians 12:20
For I am afraid that perhaps [1 Cor 4:21; 2 Cor 2:1-4] when I come I may find you to be not what I wish and may be found by you to be not what you wish; that perhaps there will be [1 Cor 1:11; 3:3] strife, jealousy, [Gal 5:20] angry tempers, [Rom 2:8; 1 Cor 11:19] disputes, [Rom 1:30; James 4:11; 1 Pet 2:1] slanders, [Rom 1:29] gossip, [1 Cor 4:6, 18; 5:2] arrogance, [1 Cor 14:33] disturbances;

1 Timothy 3:11
Women must likewise be dignified, [2 Tim 3:3; Titus 2:3] not malicious gossips, but [1 Tim 3:2] temperate, faithful in all things.

1 Timothy 5:13
At the same time they also learn to be idle, as they go around from house to house; and not merely idle, but also [3 John 10] gossips and [2 Thess 3:11] busybodies, talking about [Titus 1:11] things not proper to mention.

2 Timothy 3:3
[Rom 1:31] unloving, irreconcilable, [1 Tim 3:11] malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, [Titus 1:8] haters of good,

Titus 2:3
Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, [1 Tim 3:11] not malicious gossips nor [1 Tim 3:8] enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good,

[sincereheart]

NLT:
Leviticus 19:16
"Do not spread slanderous gossip among your people.[19:16 Hebrew [Do not act as a merchant toward your own people.] ] "Do not try to get ahead at the cost of your neighbor's life, for I am the LORD.

Psalm 41:6
They visit me as if they are my friends, but all the while they gather gossip, and when they leave, they spread it everywhere.

Psalm 69:12
I am the favorite topic of town gossip, and all the drunkards sing about me.

Proverbs 11:13
A gossip goes around revealing secrets, but those who are trustworthy can keep a confidence.

Proverbs 16:28
A troublemaker plants seeds of strife; gossip separates the best of friends.

Proverbs 20:19
A gossip tells secrets, so don't hang around with someone who talks too much.

Proverbs 25:10
or others may accuse you of gossip. Then you will never regain your good reputation.

Proverbs 25:23
As surely as a wind from the north brings rain, so a gossiping tongue causes anger!

Proverbs 26:20
Fire goes out for lack of fuel, and quarrels disappear when gossip stops.

Romans 1:29
Their lives became full of every kind of wickedness, sin, greed, hate, envy, murder, fighting, deception, malicious behavior, and gossip.

2 Corinthians 12:20
For I am afraid that when I come to visit you I won't like what I find, and then you won't like my response. I am afraid that I will find quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfishness, backstabbing, gossip, conceit, and disorderly behavior.

1 Timothy 5:13
Besides, they are likely to become lazy and spend their time gossiping from house to house, getting into other people's business and saying things they shouldn't.

[sincereheart]

I find it is impossible to pray for and gossip about a person at the same time.

Now that struck home.

Thanks for these sincereheart!

You're welcome!  
That article (with a few other things), has really gotten me to thinking about this whole thing!

[sincereheart]

ESV:
Ezekiel 36:3
therefore prophesy, and say, Thus says the Lord GOD: Precisely because they made you desolate and crushed you from all sides, so that you became the possession of the rest of the nations, and you became the talk and evil gossip of the people,

Romans 1:29
They were filled with all manner of unrighteousness, evil, covetousness, malice. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, maliciousness. They are gossips,

2 Corinthians 12:20
For I fear that perhaps when I come I may find you not as I wish, and that you may find me not as you wish--that perhaps there may be quarreling, jealousy, anger, hostility, slander, gossip, conceit, and disorder.

1 Timothy 5:13
Besides that, they learn to be idlers, going about from house to house, and not only idlers, but also gossips and busybodies, saying what they should not.

[sincereheart]

CEV:
Leviticus 19:16
Don't be a gossip, but never hesitate to speak up in court, especially if your testimony can save someone's life.

Psalm 15:3
and don't spread gossip; they treat others fairly and don't say cruel things.

Psalm 31:20
You are their shelter from harmful plots, and you are their protection from vicious gossip.

Psalm 41:6
When visitors come, all they ever bring are worthless words, and when they leave, they spread gossip.

Psalm 50:20
you sat around gossiping, ruining the reputation of your own relatives."

Psalm 69:12
Rulers and judges gossip about me, and drunkards make up songs to mock me.

Psalm 69:26
They cause trouble for people you have already punished; their gossip hurts those you have wounded.

Psalm 101:5
Anyone who spreads gossip will be silenced, and no one who is conceited will be my friend.

Proverbs 11:9
Dishonest people use gossip to destroy their neighbors; good people are protected by their own good sense.

Proverbs 11:13
A gossip tells everything, but a true friend will keep a secret.

Proverbs 16:28
Gossip is no good! It causes hard feelings and comes between friends.

Proverbs 18:8
There's nothing so delicious as the taste of gossip! It melts in your mouth.

Proverbs 20:19
Stay away from gossips-- they tell everything.

Proverbs 25:9
When you and someone else can't get along, don't gossip about it. [25.9 [When. . . it] : Or " Settle a problem privately between you and your neighbor and don't involve others." ]

Proverbs 26:20
Where there is no fuel a fire goes out; where there is no gossip arguments come to an end.

Proverbs 26:22
There is nothing so delicious as the taste of gossip! It melts in your mouth.

Romans 1:29,30
They are evil, wicked, and greedy, as well as mean in every possible way. They want what others have, and they murder, argue, cheat, and are hard to get along with. They gossip, 30say cruel things about others, and hate God. They are proud, conceited, and boastful, always thinking up new ways to do evil.

2 Corinthians 12:20
I am afraid that when I come, we won't be pleased with each other. I fear that some of you may be arguing or jealous or angry or selfish or gossiping or insulting each other. I even fear that you may be proud and acting like a mob.

1 Timothy 3:11
Women [3.11 [Women] : Either church officers or the wives of church officers.] must also be serious. They must not gossip or be heavy drinkers, and they must be faithful in everything they do.

1 Timothy 5:13
Besides, they will become lazy and get into the habit of going from house to house. Next, they will start gossiping and become busybodies, talking about things that are none of their business.

Titus 2:3
Tell the older women to behave as those who love the Lord should. They must not gossip about others or be slaves of wine. They must teach what is proper,

3 John 1:10
So if I come, I will remind him of how he has been attacking us with gossip. Not only has he been doing this, but he refuses to welcome any of the Lord's followers who come by. And when other church members want to welcome them, he puts them out of the church.

[Reba]

With  a few hundred words Sincereheart closed allthe christian chats i have ever been to  

Love to some is a sweet kind word ...

Love to this one is a 2by4  


thanks for the reminder

[Whitehorse]

What an *awesome* thread! Hats off to you, Sincereheart. Gossip works strife amongst the family of God-the body of Christ. He aready bore so much on the cross, yet satan uses the fleshly nature to bruise and batter the body of Christ still further through dissention and gossip. God hates dissention amongst His own. A loud, resounding AMEN to your beautiful posts. You are a breath of fresh air.

Love in Christ,
Whitehorse

[sincereheart]

With  a few hundred words Sincereheart closed allthe christian chats i have ever been to  

Love to some is a sweet kind word ...

Love to this one is a 2by4  

LOL!  

thanks for the reminder

You're welcome!  

[sincereheart]

What an *awesome* thread! Hats off to you, Sincereheart. Gossip works strife amongst the family of God-the body of Christ. He aready bore so much on the cross, yet satan uses the fleshly nature to bruise and batter the body of Christ still further through dissention and gossip. God hates dissention amongst His own.

That's what breaks my heart! In real life, I've been seeing so many wounded by 'gossip' disguised as 'truth', prayer requests, etc.

A loud, resounding AMEN to your beautiful posts. You are a breath of fresh air.

Love in Christ,
Whitehorse

Awwww, thanks!  

[sincereheart]

Gossip: Are You All Ears?    
 
Lauren Arjona  
This article is courtesy of HomeLife magazine

When a friend shares his or her opinion or information about someone else, what do you normally do?

a. Savor the information.
b. Offer a few choice morsels of your own.
c. Refuse to listen.
d. Direct them to speak to the person they are speaking about.
 
The truth is, gossip has the tongues of many Christians wagging … and picking … and snipping. Gossip is addictive, and it’s a tough habit to break, especially since so many of us are in denial about its presence in our lives.

And just so we aren’t confused about its presence, the Bible contains numerous terms to explain exactly what gossip means to God. Scripture speaks of slander (Ephesians 4:31), whispering (Psalm 41:7), story telling (Leviticus 19:16), babbling or chattering (Proverbs 10:8; Ecclesiastes 10:11), tattling (1 Timothy 5:13), defaming (1 Corinthians 4:13), repeating matters (Proverbs 17:9), and meddling (1 Timothy 5:13).
No wonder God created each of us with two ears and one tongue. Look at the havoc we can wreak with just one speaking part!

Telling the Painful Truth

Most Christians are surprised to learn that God doesn’t care whether the stories we’re spreading are true or false; it’s all gossip to Him (false – Matthew 5:11; true – Proverbs 17:9; malicious – Psalm 31:13, or foolish – Proverbs 10:18).

What exactly is going on inside of us, propelling us to pollute our homes and our churches with gossip? Why do we have such loose tongues and such itching ears? Why do we so easily spread toxic tales with the same tongues we use to quote Bible passages? The answers to these questions are quite telling.

1. We gossip because knowledge is power.

Sometimes, the sheer monotony of everyday life can lead to discouragement and a feeling of powerlessness. One cure for this depletion, and thus the gossip bug it spreads, is wholesome relationships that focus our thoughts on God and restore our feelings of purpose and worth.

Titus 2:4-5 tells the older women to train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands.

The answer is in the first part of the verse: “Older women train younger women.” That training takes time. It requires conversation, Bible study, and prayer. That, in turn, creates relationship. And developing relationship by spending time with a mentor can curtail the need for power plays, defensive game playing, and, yes, gossip.

2. We gossip to manipulate or control a situation or person.

Sometimes we share information in the hope that the listening individual will take action. When situations are out of our control, a well-dropped morsel can inspire a friend, a spouse, or even a pastor to step in and “fix things.”

Motives may be pure in this type of gossiping, but faith is absent. Perhaps we really are concerned and have this overwhelming urge to share information about a problem. But there’s only One we should trust with the burden for a friend or loved-one and only one safe place to share information – on our knees in prayer.

That prayer should, more often than not, start with repentance and asking forgiveness. When we take matters into our own hands by seeking to manipulate others toward action, we remove God from the throne of our lives. We’re basically telling ourselves and others that God is powerless to act and to heal. Once we have our relationship straight with God, we then need to share our every concern with Him, privately, in prayer.

3. We gossip because we’re hostile.

When we whisper a tale about someone, it’s as if we’re throwing stones. And we’ve all felt the sting of rocks – they hurt. So why do we keep throwing them?

Search your heart. Are anger and hostility rooted there? Seek to forgive those who may have wronged you. You may need to spend time in counseling or fasting and prayer to do so. Do what God leads you to do to stop hitting back.

4. We gossip because we’re jealous. Yikes!

This one’s hard to hear and even harder to admit. But tearing down another person deceives us into thinking we’re somehow better. There are numerous verses about God’s love and how He can restore self-worth. The bottom line is that when the Holy Spirit lives in the heart of a believer, that person can let go of the need for approval, attention, and superiority.

Romans 3:22-24 states,  “There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”

That passage leaves no room for jealousy – and neither should the life of a believer for that matter. God planned us all to be different. Let Him give you insight into how He has blessed and gifted you to serve Him.

5. We gossip because we have a gang mentality.

In biblical times, stoning was an equal-opportunity event. Today it’s not uncommon for Christians to join forces in verbally stoning someone.

To stop the gang mentality, some friends may need to take a break from each other. Or, if another person isn’t willing to stop gossiping, a relationship may need to be severed all together. Others may need to be counseled or mentored by more mature Christians.

Still others may simply need to hold one other accountable: To ask, “Why are we doing this, and how do we stop?” Those are brave questions, but chances are, others feel uncomfortable with the patterns, too. Let these discussions guide your prayers and actions.

Gossip is sin. It destroys families, relationships, and churches. Let God use you to share His purpose with His children, restore Him to His position of authority, and heal broken relationships. What a story you will have to tell then!

Lauren Arjona is a freelance writer from Rialto, California.