We Owe Children an Apology

[sincereheart]

I'm sorry:

That we adults have shirked our duties to rear, nurture and protect you. That we've convinced ourselves that you don't need two parents -- a mother and a father -- but that any sex-neutral combo will do.

That even when you were nearly newborn, we handed you over to strangers, whom we trusted to care for you but who, in our hearts, we knew couldn't love you as we would.

I'm sorry:

That by changing "caregivers" every few months, we failed to help you build the bonds of trust that would help you develop cognitively and emotionally, thus to ward off the societal pathologies sure to surround you.

That in our efforts to provide all material things you might want someday, we forgot that our being there was more important to you than 4,000 plastic toys. That we've created a system that rips apart families during divorce and makes you pawns in custody disputes instead of realizing that you love and need both of your parents.

That we've given you rights before you're capable of understanding their purpose. We gave you the right -- and the means -- to have sex before you're ready. We gave you the right to abort pregnancies, even without your parents' consent, before you had the maturity to understand the weight of that decision.

I'm sorry that we've made drugs so much a part of your life that you can't get through a school day without medication, that we've delegated your emotional well-being to peers and hired help.

That we've given you the power to challenge rules instead of insisting that you obey them. You can call the American Civil Liberties Union and force institutions to bow to your individual wishes rather than learn that a civil society depends on cooperation and adherence to rules.

That we've robbed you of the protection of teachers and principals by forbidding them to discipline bullies and troublemakers. When a fellow student curses and shoves a teacher, or punches another student, you have to worry if the punishment will end with violence rather than the swift, sure actions of grown-ups.

I'm sorry that we've eliminated the rites and rituals -- prayers, pledges, songs -- that used to give children confidence, a sense of belonging and the hope that life was about more than sex, violence and rock 'n' roll.

I'm sorry we told you that God was a relative notion entertained by zealots who want to control you rather than an expression of love and the promise of a better tomorrow.

That you've been left to wonder at life's meaning without a strong, adult hand to guide you. That even as your contemporaries kill, rape and terrorize each other, all we can do is wring our hands and convene caucuses. That the only remedy we've left ourselves are empty words:

I'm praying.

 

~Kathleen Parker
Jewish World Review  June 10, 1999 /26 Sivan 5759
http://www.jewishworldreview.com

[Bronzesnake]

 Great job my sister! Amen!

bronzesnake.

[Shammu]

Great post sister.

[His_child]

Awesome post!

[Reba]

AMEN

[nChrist]

Sincereheart,

Sister, thank you for sharing that with us. We can do more than wring our hands and shout "woe is me". We all need some serious and regular time on our knees. We shouldn't get up until we feel the strength to STAND UP! When we become wobbly, it's time for more prayer. Getting on our knees to pray is not an excuse to lay down. It is simply a repeated request for God to give us strength to STAND AND FIGHT!

I believe that God will grant our request if we spend more time on our knees. Grandpas and Grandmas just might be the most fierce warriors in this fight.

These thoughts and truths should bring sadness to all of us. Maybe some encouragement is in order, so I'll tell you "Hit'um Again Grandma."

Love In Christ,
Tom

[iconHis]

Extremely basic, wonderful truths, and thank you for sharing this Sincereheart.

Profound BEP.  Very.

Thank you both.

If I may share something in relation to all this.  It's rather a testimony, but on the whole not debating what sincereheart posted here, only agreeing fully with the pround basic truths that have been lost in our society.
I am a basic person, never able to interact with society too much, except church, and work.  Never have been.  I have always set my priorities towards my family.  Don't watch tv too often, althought lately been making myself to relax a little.And I homeschooled three of my children. With the last child her whole life except last year.  This style of life was enough for me to continue in the Lord, yet, there always were attacks on the marital side that were always extremely damaging and I always had to pick up all the pieces and go on.  Just keeping my family in the Lord's ways was enough for me as a wife and mother, as far as my responsibilities go.

To say the least, my daughters experience in public school was the most disastrous experience that I had been the most mournful over.  And as a result, as noted in posts, I lost time at work to be a stay at home mom to take care of the matter.  The Lord has blessed me, even though it's tough, I do without a lot of what people have now, I am full of joy in the Lord, which is difficult with the little time I have, yet that joy is always coming to heart throughout my days which is worth the endeavours and careful, stressful planning.  If only we could somehow express to others the way it is easy, less costly, and more fulfilling for the child to homeschool the first formative years.   I know that professionals are even going without lately after checking out the well balanced self-esteem and highly marked education that rises out of homeschooling.  This has been an alternative made easy only in the past few years, with many avenues for social involvement, even with school activities.  But there's even more over the internet that is more hands on, realistic involvement such as writing, math, science, and the fine arts.

My daughter couldn't understand the childish interactions, poor decisions, and waste of time in gossiping with lies. Nor did she understand why somebody would want to hurt others.  She understands the world, but couldn't understand the pettiness at the age she and her peers were in the eight grade.  

If anybody reading this post has any questions or interests in homeschooling, they are welcome to email me and I will gladly answer any question they may have to the best of my ability.

I am not cutting public school, it has a lot to offer, so please don't be offended. I attempted public because she wanted to attend, and I just became a single mother by no choice at that time.  Therefore, it didn't work out for convenince.

In Christ, iconHis  

[ravenloche]

Wow! Great post!

[alliecat]

I'm 27 and I grew up in the society you are talking about and am still surrounded by it today. I do believe that parents of the baby boomer generation did slack a little on teaching moral values. Fortunately for me, I battled thorugh it, struggled and came out okay. I know for me I have learned from it all what kind of parent I will be. Don't worry, I forgive you all. Without some of those struggles I don't know that I would be as strong of a christian as I am today.