Is Love Selfish?

[Evangelist]

Love: agapao:

The only time agapao is used in scripture is in relation to the love of God. Agapao (or agape if you prefer) is a unique love that is one way. It goes out, and does not expect or anticipate anything in return.

When God prompts me, by His Spirit, to exhibit (do) love (His love, agapao) to someone else, it is unselfish. It does not expect or anticipate anything in return, but is done simply because that is what HE wants.

That I may benefit as a result of showing that love is immaterial...it goes with the territory, and is simply a part and parcel of properly showing that love.

Now, IF I exhibit "love" to someone else with the thought in mind that I will gain some kind of return, whether it be from the one the love is shown to, or by the gathering of a reward in heaven, or even by just feeling better about myself, then I have not exhibited HIS love, which is the ONLY TRUE love....and therefore it is selfish.

So....what kind of love do you have? Agapao, phileo, or eros?

"and Jesus said, Peter, do you agapao me?"
"and peter answered, and said 'yea, Lord, you know that I phileo you'"
"and again, Jesus said, Peter, do you agapao me?"
"and Peter said again, 'Lord, you know that I phileo you' "
"and a third time Jesus said, Peter......do you phileo me?"
"and Peter was wroth, and distressed....."

because he knew by the third question that Jesus (agapao) had come down to Peter's level of understanding and commitment (phileo), which was a two way, scratch your back IF you scratch mine type of love.

[Allinall]

Now, IF I exhibit "love" to someone else with the thought in mind that I will gain some kind of return, whether it be from the one the love is shown to, or by the gathering of a reward in heaven, or even by just feeling better about myself, then I have not exhibited HIS love, which is the ONLY TRUE love....and therefore it is selfish.

I agree.  I would only add that love is what you do for someone.  It isn't a feeling.  If you do something for someone for sake of personal gain, it isn't love.  If you do something for someone to better them, build them up, or to show God's love to them, then it is love.  

Paul addresses this in 1 Corinthians 13:1-3.  Uniquely, it's right smack dab in the middle of his disertation on the gifts.  Why?  Because, as he says, if we do these great things without love, that is, we do them for self and not for others sake, then we are nothing, do nothing and gain nothing.

Love is it's own safeguard.  If the heart is right, the love is shown and expressed.  If the heart is selfish, we are nothing, do nothing, and gain nothing.  We can selfishly give a starving person a meal, or selfishly preach a gospel message, or selfishly die for someone, but if we do so all of it is for naught.  Love is the key.  Can't miss it.  Can't call it selfish and still call it love.    Good post there Evangelist.

Just a thought...

[Kristi Ann]

Right from Kristi Ann's Haven and How I feel about Love!

The Greatest Gift

This is Unconditional Love!

First Corinthians Chapter 13

The Greatest Spiritual Gift


1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal.

2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.

3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.
 
4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up;

5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil;

6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth;

7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

8 Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away.

9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part.

10 But when that which is perfect has come, then that which is in part will be done away.

11 When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

12 For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known.

13 And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.


********************************************

More Love;


John 3:16-17

16   For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have Everlasting Life.

17   For God sent not His Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through Him might be saved.
   

Holy Bible -- King James Version


God is Love, Love is Kind!!!

KristiAnn

[Bronzesnake]

 Here's a sobering thought...

The greatest majority of God's actions from the bible describe His wrath and vengeance upon mankind, as opposed to His love.

Sorry if I've bummed anyone out.

Bronzesnake.

[Evangelist]

Here's a sobering thought...
The greatest majority of God's actions from the bible describe His wrath and vengeance upon mankind, as opposed to His love.
Sorry if I've bummed anyone out.
Bronzesnake.

No bumming, Bronze....just goes to emphasize the disdain and fitting punishment that God will mete out on those who do not grasp and accept HIS definition of love.

I kinda think He is trying to make a point! Eh?

[2nd Timothy]

I was thinking about it and there isnt one instance of love where I dont benefit. If I am constantly gaining value, by loving someone, is that not selfish? Selflessness is where I sacrifice value and gain none. So if I gain anything by being in love, then it makes love a selfish thing.

I'm a little late on this thread, but try this one on for size...

Joh 15:13  Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

Greatest act of Love, Ultimate loss to gain ratio.   Complete selflessness.  

Is this kind of Love selfish?  Try it sometime !  

Grace and Peace!

[JudgeNot]

There is definitely a "fool" present.  Unfortunately, that fool doesn’t recognize himself.

[alliecat]

You know, I ask myself these kinds of confusing questions all the time and then I just drive myself crazy! My take on love is that it's a wonderful thing that God gave us and we shouldn't take it for granted and we should give it just as much as we recieve it. I am thankful that God gave me the ability to feel love. I can use that ability to love him back!

[Allinall]

There is definitely a "fool" present.  Unfortunately, that fool doesn’t recognize himself.

I do too.  And thanks for pointing it out to everybody.  While you're at it, why don't you give me a paper cut and pour lemon juice on it?!

 

Sorry.  Just watched Princess Bride.  Had to be shared.