The Young Woman's Guide through Life to Immortality

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Weep you may, and you ought, at giving up the dear delights you have enjoyed from childhood in your father's house; and you cannot but sometimes feel pensive at recollecting the friends from whom you have been separated. But to allow your love of home to make absence from it intolerable wretchedness; to render you moody and melancholy, discontented and ill-tempered; to unfit you for business, and make you unpleasant to your employer and companions—exhibits a weak mind, a feeble heart, and a sickly character. Rise above this! If Providence calls you away from home, bear it with composure. Go out expecting to meet with privations, and make up your mind to endure them with fortitude. Make the best of your situation. Doom not yourself to misery on this account. You may be happy anywhere—with religion, good disposition, submission to your lot, and usefulness. If you determine to find out such pleasures as your present situation affords, instead of always looking back upon that which you have left; if you resolve, by God's grace, to please and be pleased; if you give up your mind to piety, industry, and usefulness—you will find that felicity is a flower that blooms, and a fruit that grows, away from home as well as at home. A cheerful spirit, like a lamp lighting any darkness into which it may be carried—lessens the discomfort of any situation, recommends you to your employer, and promotes your interest as well as your happiness.

Perhaps it may not be amiss to say a few things on the choice of a residence, as it appertains to your parents, where they are living—as well as to yourselves. Let the subject be made the matter of earnest and believing prayer to God. "In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths." "Commit your way to him, and he shall bring it to pass." These are precious declarations, and they are sustained by promises no less precious. "The meek will he guide in judgment, and the meek will he teach his way." "I will instruct you, and teach you in the way which you shall go—I will guide you with my eye." With such exhortations and assurances, what should be your resolution? "You shall guide me with your counsel." There is Providence in everything. Even your most minute affairs are under Divine direction. Your times are in his hand. Do not doubt it. Hold fast the truth that God hears your prayer, casts your lot, and fixes the bounds of your habitation. Pray, pray earnestly, believingly, and expectantly. All situations and all hearts are at his disposal.

In selecting, accepting, and retaining a residence, consult its religious advantages. In these are included such means of pulpit religious instruction as are likely to build up a young disciple on her holy faith, and to quicken into activity the principles of godliness planted in her soul by the Spirit of God. It is not ordinarily desirable, where a selection can be made, to choose a residence where even the minor matters of the sacraments and church government differ from those to which you have been accustomed. This exposes you, if not to a change of sentiment, yet to antagonism and perplexity, which are unfavorable to the quiet enjoyment of your own personal religion, and may do you injury by producing a spirit of controversy. Where the differences of opinion are of a more serious kind, affecting even the fundamental doctrines of the gospel—no pious young person should expose herself to any hazard of this kind.

I will now address a few special counsels and cautions to two or three classes of those who are in the circumstances contemplated by this discourse.

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Many are occupied in the very important and responsible duties of a resident governess. This is a situation of delicacy, difficulty, and momentous consequence; and requires much wisdom, prudence, and conscientiousness. There are many parties concerned, all of whose interests and comfort should and must be consulted. You who are in this situation owe something to yourself. Those who have hired you, will be most likely to pay you the respect due to you when they see you respecting yourself. If they so far confide in you as to entrust you with the education of their children, they ought to treat you in such a manner as to teach them also to confide in you and esteem you. But this will depend much upon your own conduct and bearing. Let them be duly aware that you expect all that is your due in the way of kind and respectful conduct, but that you expect no more. Any apprehension on their part that your demands in this respect are too high, or are preferred in an obtrusive and exacting spirit, will be sure to set them on their guard against you as a person of encroaching disposition, and will dispose them to yield you less than you are entitled to. A kind, attentive, respectful, and dignified bearing towards them, as far from servility on the one hand, as it is from familiarity on the other, as well as a right behavior towards their children, will in most cases accomplish all you wish. If you have taken your present situation, after coming down in life, let there be no such sense of degradation and mortified pride, no such loftiness as will make you gloomy, dissatisfied, unhappy, and repulsive.

Even should it appear that you have exchanged places with your employers, that they once were in the situation of inferiority which you now occupy, give no evidence that you are aware of it, and take no notice of little ebullitions of vulgarity, or even purse-proud insolence, not uncommon to those who have risen in life. If sometimes you cannot be insensible to this, and you feel your spirit rising within you, and your cheek growing flushed and warm, so that your mortification cannot be concealed, call in religion to your aid; comfort yourself in God; and exemplify the Christian in a spirit of meek forbearance. In such circumstances, many a tearful look will be thrown back by memory on that home from which you have been driven by misfortune, or rather by Providence, and you will need to retire to calm your perturbation and repress your indignation. In such cases, go and by prayer invite the hand of your Heavenly Father to wipe your weeping eyes, and compose your ruffled spirit and agitated heart.

Then there are the CHILDREN entrusted to your care for their education. Enter upon your task with a deep and solemn sense of responsibility to them, to their parents, and to God. Abhor the baseness, injustice, and cruelty, of being satisfied with any manner of discharging your duty, so that you get your board and salary, and respectful treatment. The future character and comfort, for both worlds, of those girls, depend much upon you. They have been placed in your hands, and look up to you as their instructress and teacher. As you would give in your account at last to God with joy and not with grief, do your very uttermost; tax your energies to do them and their parents justice, in instructing their minds, forming their characters, and fitting them for the station they are to occupy in life. Prepare yourself for your task by constant reading and study. Do not be satisfied with your present qualifications. The education of a rational and immortal creature, for this world and the next—is a great work. Improve your own mind, to be better fitted to improve theirs. Win their confidence by your ability; their affection by your kindness; their respect by your dignity; and their industry by your own diligence. Let your aim be, not only to communicate knowledge—but wisdom; not only to store the memory—but to strengthen the judgment, to nerve the will, and to make the conscience tender; not only to teach them to think correctly—but to act with propriety, discretion, and promptness, in any situation in which they may be placed.

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As regards religion, that of course must depend much upon the views of the parents. If they are similar to your own, and you have unrestricted liberty on this point, labor to the uttermost to form the religious character of your youthful charge. Ever consider the education of an immortal being incomplete without instruction in that which alone can fit her for immortality. But never act the part of a secret zealot, by inculcating principles opposed to those of the parents. I should say to a Christian young woman—go into no situation where you are not allowed to teach what you consider to be the truth as it is in Jesus. Do not conceal your sentiments—and afterwards teach them secretly and stealthily. You would abhor such conduct in a Romanist—do not be guilty of it yourself. Of course you should not, and cannot conscientiously teach what you believe to be error; therefore do not go where you would be required to do so.

Then come the PARENTS to be considered by you. Of course you will do everything you can to uphold their authority, even as they ought to do their uttermost to uphold yours. You should also most assiduously labor to secure the affections of their children for them, rather than for yourself. It would be treachery of the basest kind to steal away the hearts of their children. Your aim should be to secure the love of the children to you, for their parents' sake, as well as your own; and then their love to their parents, for your own sake as well as theirs.

There is another thing to be observed, and one which I shall touch upon with the delicacy it demands; and that is the fact, that a wife has sometimes been made uncomfortable by the presence of a governess. Jealousy, it is true, is sometimes in this case suspicious without reason. But are there no cases in which such uneasiness is not entirely the result of an over-sensitive and morbid imagination? Respect your own character and dignity, the wife's peace and the husband's honor, too much ever to seek or accept attentions which, from him, even though playful and innocent, may excite uneasiness in that one bosom, the tranquility of which is so easily disturbed by any act of his. Conduct yourself so as to be not without blame—but without suspicion.

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Apart from this, do nothing by becoming the depository of secrets, hearing tales, or uttering insinuations, to loosen the bonds, or violate the affection, of the husband and wife, or to disturb the peace of the family. If unhappily, a difference should exist, keep yourself as much as possible out of the way of witnessing it, or let your wisest and kindest offices be exerted to heal the breach. Win for yourselves the blessing which will come upon the peacemaker, and cause the family to bless the hour which made you a member of their household. Recollect you are bound in honor never to make the transactions or condition of the family, a matter of conversation with others. Without being actually sworn or even pledged to secrecy, you are solemnly bound to observe it; you are a traitress to the family which has received you as an inhabitant, if you make their affairs known to others. Never intermeddle with the servants, and especially avoid all unnecessary familiarity with them. Keep to your own sphere, and diligently discharge your own duties. You will find sufficient scope there for all your time, your energies, and your anxiety.

To maintain a course of conduct, seek by prayer the grace and wisdom which come from on high, and under all the trials of your situation, whether the waywardness of the children, or the ingratitude, pride, or petulance of the parents—seek the comfort which comes from the Father of mercies, and the God of all consolation.

Governesses in a school are a class of young women, who, though acting under the direction and supervision of another, and therefore with less responsibility than those who reside in a family—have to discharge very important duties, for which high qualifications, both intellectual and moral, are essential.

I next consider the case of those young people who are employed in retail shops, and they form a very large class. Their situation is often one of far greater discomfort and moral danger than that of the class just mentioned. In addition to the oppressive and exhausting labor which modern competition imposes upon them, in common with all who are engaged in trade, they have to bear in some cases the unkindness of their employers, who are not infrequently deplorably lacking in regard to the comfort of those whom they have received into their service—as to their food, lodging, and general treatment. A surly master and his unfeeling wife, intent only upon what they can get out of the flesh, bone, and muscle of their servants, and caring little for their welfare—never satisfied with even the most exemplary diligence and competent ability, and therefore ever urging to greater labor, and ever uttering the language of complaint—always suspicious, even where there is no ground for it, of the honesty of their servants—such are the trials which some of these hapless young people have to bear.

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In such a case, you who have to endure it, need comfort. The recollections of home, where all was kindness, happiness, and confidence—embitter, by the power of contrast, the ills you have to sustain. Bear all with as much patience as you can command. Seek consolation in true piety. Carry your sorrows to God by prayer. When the bitter contrast between your position when at home and your present situation from home forces itself upon your thoughts, and sends a tear to your eye and a pang to your heart, go to Him whose gracious presence is ever with you, and whose infinite love is ever ready for you.

But it is not thus with all shopkeepers. I am not describing the class, but only some of its members; the exceptions, rather than the rule. I know heads of retail establishments, employing a large number of young people, who cherish for them something of the feelings of parents, and regard them almost in the light of children—nor is it their temporal comfort exclusively, but also their spiritual welfare, which is the object of their solicitude. And this is obviously the incumbent duty of employers.

Whether your employers be generous and kind, or neglectful and oppressive—do your duty—and seek to possess all the qualifications which will commend you to their esteem. DILIGENCE is indispensable. It is the first excellence of one in your situation. Be anxious to please, and as earnest to serve your employer as if the business were your own. No one will or can employ an indolent servant. Be an early riser. Comply with all the rules of the shop. Aim at excellence. Seek to be bright and alert. Cultivate an attractive, winning, and even polite address. Be an intelligent shop-woman.

Especially let your HONESTY be above suspicion. Deem it no insult or reproach that I caution you on this subject. You are exposed to temptation. Money in small sums is continually passing through your hands, your salary is low, and through the deceitfulness of the heart you may dwell on the injustice of your small earnings, until you imagine it lawful to pay yourself, and make up what you should in justice receive. Resist every temptation of this kind. Rather starve and die, than appropriate to your own use an article of clothing or decoration, or a farthing of money belonging to your employer. As a guard upon your integrity, and a check to temptation, avoid expense in dress and ornament. Vanity is insatiable, and has led more people into dishonesty than any other passion. A taste for finery fostered and indulged, with a salary too small to yield the means of its gratification, has in innumerable instances led to acts of pilfering to supply the deficiency.

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In some establishments, young people of both sexes are employed. Where this is the case it brings new perils, and requires additional caution. Your honor, your respectability, your safety, require that you should be most anxiously upon your guard. How earnestly, as well as sincerely, should you present those beautiful petitions of our Lord's prayer, "Lead me not into temptation, but deliver me from evil." Avoid all undue familiarity, all flippant and trifling conduct, all jocularity, with the young men employed in the same establishment. Maintain a proper self-respect, a befitting reserve, and a dignified bearing; they will be a fence round your character, and prevent even the approach of anything that would insult your purity, or offend the most fastidious modesty.

You have need to be upon your guard against the influence of companions even of your own sex. In large and even in moderate establishments many young women are associated together, without in some cases, any matronly superintendent being placed over them, and with almost unrestricted opportunities for free conversation and general interaction. It is no severe reflection on the sex to suppose that in such a number of young people, there may be some who have no personal religion, whose sense of female decorum and propriety is not the most delicate, and who, without being immoral, are still so given to levity, vanity, and romance—as to exert an unfavorable influence over the rest. Be upon your guard against influence of this kind.

Gain all the good you can, from those who are your associates—but avoid all the evil. Be good tempered, accommodating, amiable, and conciliatory—but set yourself against all that is improper. Be an example of all that is good—and then you may be a reprover of all that is evil. Let there be no affected superiority; nothing like, "Stand aside—I am holier than you." But demonstrate all the consistency, gentleness and sweetness of unaffected goodness, of true piety, and good conduct—and then you may be a blessing to those around you.

Be especially careful in the selection of a particular friend from the rest of your companions. Be not led away by specious appearances, nor induced to commit yourself by professions of friendship on the part of another, or by the first feelings of preference on your own. But take time to ascertain the correctness of her principles, the consistency of her conduct, and the respectability of her family—otherwise you may be led into snares and dangers which you very little anticipate.

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For your conduct towards your employers, if a master, I refer you to what I have said to the Governess. Instances have occurred within my knowledge to prove that cautions on this head are not altogether unnecessary. An evil eye has sometimes lighted on an unsuspecting female, and men bound by every tie of honor, and by their solemn vow to a wife, have been despicable enough to assail, and in some instances to destroy, the purity, the honor, and the peace, of those whom they were bound in duty to protect. Spurn then with disdain and indignation any such attempts, receive no special attentions, and quit the service of the wretch whom you suspect of a design against that which ought to be dearer to you a thousand times over, than even life itself.

Female servants are a most important and a very numerous class of young women away from home, and often a very destitute and much exposed one. Their case however is so needful of enlarged counsel and caution that I inserted in the "Family Monitor" a chapter to meet it, and reprinted it separately as a tract.

I shall now conclude this chapter by some few general remarks, which will apply alike to all classes of those who are away from home.

Again and again I say, commit yourselves by true faith in Christ into the hands of God for protection and consolation. How many beautiful passages and examples of holy Scripture, in addition to those already quoted, could be adduced, which apply with peculiar force to your case. Look at poor Hagar, who was much to be pitied as well as much to be blamed, alone in the wilderness, "when the angel of the Lord found her by the fountain of water, and she called the name of the Lord that spoke unto her—God, You see me." If, when God found her there, notwithstanding some past misconduct and self-reproach, she comforted herself in that desolate place with the consideration that she was compassed about with the presence of the Lord; with how much greater confidence and peace may you cheer your heart with the thought of an ever-present God, you who have not been driven out as she was by misconduct from your home, but have been led out from it by Providence.

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Yes, God is in every place, he is with you, "he encompasses your path, he knows your down-sitting and up-rising, and is acquainted with all your ways." You have left your earthly father, but your heavenly one is with you. You are far from your earthly home, but if you are a Christian, you are as near as ever to your heavenly one. The eyes that lately beamed affection upon you, do not see you now, and you do not see them; but lifting your voice to God, you can say, "God, You see me!" His eye is upon you, his heart yearns over you, his arms are underneath you.

Also, what promises are on record for you. Do you fear the lack of adequate provision? "Trust in the Lord, and do good—so shall you dwell in the land, and verily you shall be fed." Do you need protection? "He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High, shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. He shall cover you with his feathers, and under his wings shall you trust; his truth shall be your defense and shield." Do you need direction? "Your ears shall hear a voice behind you, saying—This is the way, walk in it." Do you dread the forlorn circumstances that await you away from home? "None who trust in him shall be desolate." Are you trembling with apprehension at the absence of all who were dear to you, and the unknown difficulties of your new situation on earth? "Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God! I will strengthen you; yes, I will help you! Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness." "My presence shall go with you and give you rest." Do you ever dread the idea of being forgotten by the friends you are leaving? "Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yes she may forget, yet will I not forget you." "I will never leave you, nor forsake you." Can anything be more consolatory than such assurances?

Need you be afraid to leave home and go out into the world with such promises? What, when omnipotence, omnipresence, omniscience, all-sufficiency, and boundless love, go with you? Why, with such assurances you may leave, not only your father's home to dwell in any other part of this land of railways and easy and speedy methods of conveyance; but may embark on board an emigrant ship, leave your native country for the opposite ends of the earth—and exultingly exclaim, "If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there shall Your hand lead me, and Your right hand shall hold me."

But then to apply the truth and feel the comfort of these precious assurances, you must have that genuine faith which alone gives you a title to them. Personal religion will, in all probability, procure you earthly friends wherever you go, for it is the soil in which all those virtues grow that conciliate affection, ensure respect, and invite confidence. God will go before you to prepare the way for you, for when a man's ways please the Lord, he makes "even his enemies to be at peace with him." Remember how he gave Joseph favor in the eyes of the governor of the prison—and how he turned the heart of Esau, brooding over purposes of revenge, into brotherly endearment. The best way to get the friendship of man is first to secure the friendship of God.

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Connected with this, acquire in an eminent degree the general good qualities which I have already alluded to. Add to piety—amiability of disposition—kindliness of disposition—gentle, artless, and attractive manners. Let there be a substratum of the solid gold of excellence, bearing at the same time the polish of the pleasant virtues of life. Those who have to make their way in the world must be attentive to external, and to what some may call, little things. It is not enough to be holy and virtuous, or even to be conscious that you are such—but you must also be attractive. You must aim to please. Real excellence may sometimes be repulsive on account of eccentricities, acid disposition, and blunt coarseness, with which it is associated. It is like grapes amid nettles or thorns, which few will attempt to gather for fear of the lacerations of the thorns.

There is a word of very difficult definition, but which, without being defined, is perfectly understood, and very impressive, "She is an pleasant young woman." This is a very common expression. Perhaps the best explanation of it is the power of giving pleasure and engaging affection. This includes, I am aware, more of nature than of art, and something of personal attraction. A manifest intention to secure the favor of an individual is almost sure to defeat its own end, and to inspire disgust. But the general good opinion of those among whom we live, can in most cases be secured by attention to their wishes, and consideration for their feelings. And surely it cannot be improper to ask, "How can I interest others in my behalf?" And those who depend upon the interest they create for themselves in the hearts of others, should study how to secure it.

Combine a due and tender recollection of home—with a noble fortitude in surrendering its comforts. You are not required to forget your father's house, and your mother's endearing society. You would be unnatural if you could. Indeed you are in little danger of this. Forget my honored father! Forget my much loved mother! Forget my brothers and sisters! Forget the sweet home of my childhood! Oh no! Memory must perish before I can be guilty of such oblivion. I muse on you all in my solitary walks. I give up many an hour's sleep to think of home. I wet my pillow with my tears, as I think of the years and joys that are gone, never to return. I dream often that I am in the midst of you all, and wake to the sad reality that I am away from home."

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        But these are not the only thoughts you are to cherish as to your home. Nor is the frequent and affectionate letter, so welcome and so precious to those who love and think of you, the only way to send comfort to your parents. Let there be the never-varying excellence of character and conduct, the uniform good behavior, the growing usefulness, which on their knowing of them, shall comfort their hearts. Avoid that fickleness which would make you soon tired of an employment. Let no unsuitable friendship of a tender nature, which they would not approve, be formed. Let no conduct, which if they knew it, would distress them, be carried on by you. They have lost the comfort of your companionship—add not to the affliction by causing them to lose the comfort of your character!

        Let your situation in a social point of view, remind you of your circumstances in a religious one. If you are a true Christian, what are you here upon earth—but a child away from home? Yes—heaven, and not earth, is the home of the believer. How simply and sublimely beautiful is the language of our Lord—"In my Father's house are many mansions—if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there you may be also." Delightful idea! Heaven is the home of the Christian, which the Savior has prepared and made ready for him. There, is God the Judge of all—the Father, of whom the whole family is named. There, is Jesus the Mediator of the New Covenant, who calls himself the First-born, the Elder Brother. There, are the spirits of the just made perfect, the brothers and sisters. There, is the innumerable company of the angels, the ministering spirits now sent forth to minister unto the heirs of salvation. What a glorious household assembled in the third heavens—the eternal home of the Redeeming God, the Great Redeemer, and the redeemed family!

        There you are going—if you are a true believer! All the dispensations of Providence and all the means of grace are preparing you for that state. All things, and among them your present situation, with all its disquiet and discomfort, are working together for your good. You are away from home here—that you may be at home there. Let this cheer and comfort you. When distressed by looking back upon the home you have left—comfort yourself by looking on to that to which you are going. Heaven, glory, eternity—are before you! You are educating for your Father's house; preparing to go in and dwell forever in his presence. Half a century hence at most, and in perhaps a much shorter time than that, it will be of no consequence to you whether you passed through life agreeably or not. The only thing about which you should be supremely concerned is, not to be shut out from the heavenly home—not to be excluded by sin, impenitence, and unbelief—from the mansions which Christ has gone to prepare. In the blessed hope of reaching that state, you might endure, not only with fortitude but with comfort—all the trials of a young woman away from home, though they were ten times greater than they are!

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THE CHARACTER OF REBEKAH

"Before I had finished praying these words, I saw Rebekah coming along with her water jug on her shoulder. She went down to the spring and drew water and filled the jug. So I said to her, 'Please give me a drink.' She quickly lowered the jug from her shoulder so I could drink, and she said, 'Certainly, sir, and I will water your camels, too!'" Genesis 24:45-46

Every one must be struck, I would think, with the narratives in the book of Genesis, and their correspondence to the state of society to which they relate. Their realistic descriptions guarantees their truthfulness, and explains their peculiarity. We find all that charming simplicity which is in keeping with the primitive life of the people referred to; together with all the defects in their conduct, which their imperfect knowledge might be expected to bring with it. Another kind of narrative, more in conformity with the advance and artificial refinement of modern society, would excite suspicion of the truthfulness of the story.

Where shall we find in all the range of fiction anything so exquisite as the history of Joseph; or even as the beautiful story which furnishes the example to be contemplated in this chapter? I invite those endowed with taste to the perusal of this portion of Holy Writ. True, it relates rather to the history of a family than of a nation. And it is worthy of remark, that the Spirit of God preserved in the inspired chronicles this little gem of historic narrative, rather than the record of anything going on at that time among the great kingdoms of antiquity, not excepting Egypt, the birthplace and cradle of science. The secular historian delights to emblazon his page with the conflicts of empires, the exploits of heroes, and the prowess of armies—but what is the influence of such records upon the moral habits, social happiness, and individual character of mankind—compared with that of the story of the holy courtship of Isaac and Rebekah?

Sarah, the beloved and faithful wife of Abraham, had died, and been laid in the cave of Machpelah. Sadness and desolation were reigning in the patriarch's household. His tent was empty; the grief of Isaac, who loved his mother most tenderly, was unsoothed; and upon him the heart of the venerable widower was now turned with more concentrated affection. Isaac, the miraculous child of promise, though forty years of age, was unmarried. The holy patriarch, amid much domestic distress—the consequence of polygamy—had known the happiness of possessing a faithful and devoted wife, and he now became naturally anxious to see his beloved son in possession of a companion in life, before he himself should go the way of all flesh. His solicitude however was not merely that Isaac should be married—but well married—which in his view meant not wealthily, but religiously. Abraham was a worshiper of Jehovah, and abhorred idolatry—by the votaries of which he was surrounded on every side; and it pierced his heart with anguish to think of the child of his love contracting a marriage with one of them. He knew that Isaac's character as well as his happiness depended upon his choice. Moreover it was not only a private matter of personal and family arrangement, involving Isaac's happiness and the comfort of his father, but also a public concern, intimately affecting the covenant which the Almighty had entered into with him, and the countless millions who were to be blessed in his seed. Isaac sustained a sacred character, he was the child of promise, and inherited, and was to transmit, the promises concerning the Messiah.

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As Abraham had relatives in the land of Mesopotamia who worshiped the living God, he determined to send his personal servant to engage a wife for Isaac from their family. We must suppose of course that all this was with the knowledge of Isaac and met with his cordial consent, though parental authority was then more extensive, and filial submission to it, more exemplary, than they now are. Parents, in those times, chose wives for their sons, and husbands for their daughters; and often were regulated in their choice more by regard to wealth and rank than by the adaptation and affection of the parties to be united. I do not wish this custom to be revived—it is unnatural, and reduces marriage to a matter of bargain and sale. But I do wish parental counsel, consent, and approbation, to be always sought in a matter of so much importance to all parties concerned, whether directly or remotely.

The trusty servant selected by Abraham proceeded on his mission—so delicate, difficult, and momentous to both the father and son. Not however until religious solemnities had been observed, and the patriarch had commended Eleazar to God by prayer. If we wanted the character of a faithful servant delineated to the life, where could we find a picture so perfect as this man? I shall not follow him through his long and wearisome journey of nearly five hundred miles, nor will I dwell upon the anxious ruminations of his mind during the weeks it occupied. Yet I cannot but imagine how constantly that mind was lifted up to God for protection, direction, and success. He at length arrived at the city of his destination. It was a summer evening, and observing a well outside the walls, he stopped to give his camels water, before he passed through the gates. Aware that it was the custom for the young women to come and draw water for household purposes, he first placed his camels by the well, and then betook himself to prayer for Divine direction.

"O Lord, God of my master," he prayed. "Give me success and show kindness to my master, Abraham. Help me to accomplish the purpose of my journey. See, here I am, standing beside this spring, and the young women of the village are coming out to draw water. This is my request. I will ask one of them for a drink. If she says, 'Yes, certainly, and I will water your camels, too!'—let her be the one you have appointed as Isaac's wife. By this I will know that you have shown kindness to my master." Genesis 24:12-14

It is noticeable that he did not fix upon the one who would first offer her services, but upon the one who would first willingly grant the service asked of her. In this he proceeded wisely, conceiving, it would seem, that a maid who offered unasked, to a stranger, even so slight a service as a draught of water at a public well, showed no maidenly spirit; and deeming perhaps that such attention might be an excuse for curiosity, and an evidence rather of officious forwardness, than of an obliging disposition.

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Eleazar's conduct in all this is worthy of notice, as furnishing a beautiful comment upon Solomon's advice, "In all your ways acknowledge Him, and he shall direct your paths." Let us thus begin, carry on, and end, all our works in God. What is begun in prayer, usually, as in this case, ends in praise. So thought Eleazar when he knelt down by the side of the well of Nahor, and poured out this simple and beautiful prayer. In his case it no doubt was well, but ordinarily it does not become us to ask, much less to prescribe, special tokens by which God shall indicate his will.

Having presented his prayer, he waited for the answer, and waited in strong faith that he should receive it. He did not wait long. A young woman came towards the well, with a water jug upon her shoulder. By her appearance, perhaps by an impression from God, he was possessed with the idea that she was the person sought, and that the Lord had answered his prayer. He therefore addressed her in the language which he had resolved to employ, and received the very answer which was to be the sign of her being the object of his mission. Her gentleness, cheerfulness, diligence, and courtesy, manifested towards a stranger of whom she could have no knowledge, were truly admirable—unmixed and uncorrupted as they were by any improper forwardness or levity. She was frank without being obtrusive, kind without being familiar. She neither ran away affrighted from his presence, for her innocence gave her courage—nor did she step beyond the decorum of her sex, nor allow her courtesy to infringe upon her modesty. It was well for Rebekah that she did not answer with a proud and haughty contempt, and a surly refusal. "Yes, and it was well for another woman, who long after met another stranger, 'wearied with his journey,' at another well, that when she met his request, 'Give me a drink,' with the surly question, 'How is it that you being a Jew, ask drink of me who am a Samaritan?' it was well, I say, for her that she had a different person from Abraham's servant to deal with."

The words in which Rebekah's answer and conduct are described, paint the scene to the life—"Drink, my lord," she said, and quickly lowered the jar to her hands and gave him a drink. After she had given him a drink, she said, "I'll draw water for your camels too, until they have finished drinking." So she quickly emptied her jar into the trough, ran back to the well to draw more water, and drew enough for all his camels." Conduct so amiable overwhelmed Eleazar; and so slow of heart are we to believe in the answer of our prayers, that—"Without saying a word, the man watched her closely to learn whether or not the Lord had made his journey successful." Genesis 24:21

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[airIam2worship]

There are cases in which the mind, like the eye, is lit up by a sudden light. It was so here. Finding at length that she was indeed the object of his journey, he could not repress the feelings of his full heart, but expressed them in two ways. The first has in all ages and in all countries been considered as one inlet to the female heart; that heart, which has at any rate been ever thought "accessible to finery, presents, and praise." "Then at last, when the camels had finished drinking, he gave her a gold ring for her nose and two large gold bracelets for her wrists."

But this was not the only expression of his joy and gratitude, for unrestrained by the presence of Rebekah, "He bowed down his head and worshiped, saying—Blessed be Jehovah, God of my master Abraham, who has not left destitute my master of his mercy and his truth—I being in the way, Jehovah led me to the house of my master's brethren." Did the heart of Rebekah, true to instinctive perception in all such matters, begin to divine what this present and this praise to God meant? Did a thought glance across her mind of the nature of this man's visit to Nahor? Or was the scene beheld by her in awe and wonder at the character and errand of the mysterious stranger? She must have known of her noble relation, Abraham, whose name she now heard in prayer from the lips of Eleazar.

But let us for a moment forget Rebekah, to look upon this holy, faithful, loving servant. Never did piety and fidelity more truly blend the sanctity of the one with the devotedness of the other. Happy master, to have such a servant! Happy servant, to be blessed with such a master!

It is not necessary for me to enter very minutely into the incidents of the scenes which followed. How Rebekah hastened with the news to her father's house, and how Laban her brother went forth to greet the stranger and conduct him to their home. We mark, as if we saw them, the courtesy of the opening interview; the frank interchange of kindly greetings and good offices; the admirable delicacy of the servant's introduction of himself to the family of Bethuel; the servant's impatience to fulfill his errand; the simple recital of what the Lord had done for him; and the full development of the object of his visit.

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[airIam2worship]

Upon hearing them, Laban, as the surviving representative of his father, replied, "The thing proceeds from the Lord, we cannot speak unto you bad or good. Behold, Rebekah is before you, take her, and go, and let her be your master's son's wife, as the Lord has spoken." This was dependent, as the after part of the narrative shows, upon the girl's consent. To help to gain this, a second splendid present was prepared for her—of jewels of silver, and jewels of gold, and clothing. This was, and is still, the oriental custom of contracting all bargains and entering into all covenants, relating to marriage, trade, or politics. Very natural was the remonstrance which the brother, and especially the mother of the bride, addressed to the impatient servant of Abraham, when in the morning he said, "Send me away to my master. And her brother and her mother said, let the girl abide with us a few days, at the least ten; after that she shall go." Whether it be a respite of ten days, or as some say, of ten months, or even years, that the mother joined with her son in soliciting, before the daughter should bid her a last adieu, this is a touch of genuine tenderness which we would not willingly lose from the narrative. For it is a narrative which proves its own truth by its being so thoroughly, all throughout, true to nature.

Rebekah was now called in and the question put to her, "Will you go with this man?" Was she deficient in virgin modesty, in prudence, in thoughtfulness? Did she display an unseemly haste to become a wife? Did she venture too carelessly to commit herself and her happiness for life to one of whom she knew nothing, but by report? Did she not take the decisive step in the dark, when she consented to peril in such haste the comfort of her life, upon the truth of the singular embassy that had come to her? In ordinary circumstances I would unquestionably reply to these questions in the affirmative, and I would earnestly recommend to all young women at the present day, and to all who have the care of them, whether parents or guardians, more delay, inquiry, and caution, than were observed in this case. Hasty offers of marriage should be met either by immediate refusal or lengthened consideration. It is too momentous an affair to be decided without much investigation and reflection.

But there was a peculiarity here. Something, perhaps, may be justly imputed to the times in which they lived, but far more to the religious state of Rebekah's mind; a sense of duty overwhelmed a feeling of reluctance, together with every inferior consideration. She was doubtless in the habit of daily communion with God, and in fervent prayer had sought Divine direction; she saw an overruling providence; God was in the affair; his finger, visible to the eye of faith, pointed the way in which she should go; and with unhesitating obedience she confessed her readiness to part from all the felicities of home, and seek a distant alliance—at the voice of the Almighty Being to whom she had committed her future destiny.

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