Krazeekkc
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Posts: 57
I'm a Christian!
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« on: September 05, 2003, 07:15:19 PM » |
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I don't mean to be rude but, here's the joke:
An Atheist
A young woman teacher with obvious liberal tendencies explains to her class of small children that she is an atheist. She asks her class if they are atheists too. Not really knowing what atheism is but wanting to be like their teacher, their hands explode into the air like fleshy fireworks.
There is, however, one exception. A beautiful girl named Lucy has not gone along with the crowd. The teacher asks her why she has decided to be different.
"Because I'm not an atheist."
Then, asks the teacher, "What are you?"
"I'm a Christian."
The teacher is a little perturbed now, her face slightly red. She asks Lucy why she is a Christian.
"Well, I was brought up knowing and loving Jesus. My mom is a Christian, and my dad is a Christian, so I am a Christian."
The teacher is now angry. "That's no reason," she says loudly.
"What if your mom was a moron, and your dad was a moron. What would you be then?"
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She paused, and smiled. "Then," says Lucy, "I'd be an atheist."
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Ambassador4Christ
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« Reply #1 on: September 05, 2003, 07:37:46 PM » |
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LOL  A young lady came home from a date and her mother could see she had been crying. "What's wrong dear?" asked the mother. "Oh Mom!" said the girl "My boyfriend asked me to marry him tonight!" "What's the matter dear, don't you love him?" asked the mother. "I do love him" said the girl... "But tonight he told me that he's an atheist! He doesn't even believe there is a hell mom!!!" The mother just smiled and said "You marry him anyway ... between the two of us we'll show him just how wrong he is!" |
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Krazeekkc
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Posts: 57
I'm a Christian!
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« Reply #2 on: September 05, 2003, 07:41:35 PM » |
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Left Coast
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« Reply #3 on: September 06, 2003, 03:30:58 AM » |
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LOL A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honour thy father and thy mother," she asked "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat, one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill." |
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Luke 24:45 Then opened he their understanding, that they might understand the scriptures,
John 6:29 Jesus answered and said unto them, This is the work of God, that ye believe on him whom he hath sent.
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Brother Love
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« Reply #4 on: September 09, 2003, 04:44:09 AM » |
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LOL A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honour thy father and thy mother," she asked "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat, one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill." Right On, LOL  Brother Love |
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Brother Love
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« Reply #5 on: September 09, 2003, 05:16:29 AM » |
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A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, “How many women can a man marry?" "Sixteen," the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly. "How do you know that?" "Easy," the little boy said. "All you have to do is add it up, like the Bishop said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer." Brother Love |
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AAAAmember
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Posts: 55
I'm a llama!
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« Reply #7 on: September 09, 2003, 05:37:31 PM » |
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Krazeekc - your joke was horrible.
The rest were fairly cute.
~AAAA
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Tibby
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« Reply #8 on: September 09, 2003, 06:20:51 PM » |
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come on, laugh a little.  |
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Was there ever a time when Common sence was common?
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Saved_4ever
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« Reply #9 on: September 09, 2003, 06:34:53 PM » |
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come on, laugh a little. I don't think that'll happen. She seems to have a mighty close relationship with a broom poll. |
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Tibby
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« Reply #10 on: September 09, 2003, 06:37:15 PM » |
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lol, that was the funniest Joke on this thread yet!
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Was there ever a time when Common sence was common?
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Krazeekkc
Jr. Member
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Posts: 57
I'm a Christian!
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« Reply #11 on: September 09, 2003, 06:45:47 PM » |
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Brother Love
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« Reply #12 on: September 10, 2003, 04:40:02 AM » |
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A boy was watching his father, a pastor, write a sermon." How do you know what to say?" he asked. "Why, God tells me." "Oh, then why do you keep crossing things out?" Brother Love |
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Brother Love
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« Reply #13 on: September 10, 2003, 04:41:34 AM » |
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A little girl became restless as the preacher's sermon dragged on and on. Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered, "Mommy, if we give him the money now, will he let us go?" Brother Love |
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3wells
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« Reply #14 on: September 10, 2003, 06:25:51 AM » |
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A Jewish lawyer was troubled by the way his son had turned out, and went to see his Rabbi about it. "I brought him up in the faith, gave him a very expensive bar mitzvah, cost me a fortune to educate him. Then he tells me last week he has decided to be a Christian.
Rabbi, where did I go wrong?"
"Funny you should come to me," said the Rabbi. "Like you, I too brought my boy up in the faith, put him through university, cost me a fortune, then one day he too comes and tells me he has decided to become a Christian."
"What did you do?" asked the lawyer.
"I turned to God for the answer", replied the Rabbi.
"And what did he say?" pressed the lawyer.
God said, 'Funny you should come to me ...' "
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