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December 11, 2017, 11:46:36 AM

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Our Lord Jesus Christ loves you.
277964 Posts in 26514 Topics by 3790 Members
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| |-+  Laughter (Good Medicine) (Moderator: admin)
| | |-+  Why Do Men Die First?
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Author Topic: Why Do Men Die First?  (Read 2390 times)
Forrest
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Posts: 537



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« on: May 26, 2004, 01:42:14 PM »

 Why Do Men Die First??
>
> This is a question that has gone unanswered for centuries ...... but,
> now we know.
>
> If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat
> race... you're a male chauvinist.
>
> If you stay home and do the housework...you're a pansy.
>
> If you work too hard...there's never any time for her.
>
> If you don't work enough...you're a good-for-nothing bum.
>
> If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay..this is exploitation.
>
> If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay.....you should get off
> your lazy behind and find something better.
>
> If you get a promotion ahead of her....that is favoritism.
>
> If she gets a job ahead of you.....it's equal opportunity.
>
> If you mention how nice she looks......it's sexual harassment.
>
> If you keep quiet..........it's male indifference.
>
> If you cry............you're a wimp.
>
> If you don't........ you're an insensitive bastard.
>
> If you make a decision without consulting her.........you're a
> chauvinist.
>
> If she makes a decision without consulting you......she's a liberated
> woman.
>
> If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy....... that's
> domination.
>
> If SHE asks you..........it's a favor.
>
> If you appreciate the female form and frilly underwear......you're a
> pervert.
>
> If you don't.............you're gay.
>
> If you like a woman to shave her legs and
> keep in shape......you're sexist.
>
> If you don't................you're unromantic.
>
> If you try to keep yourself in shape................you're vain.
>
> If you don't...............you're a slob.
>
> If you buy her flowers............you're after something.
>
> If you don't....................you're not thoughtful.
>
> If you're proud of your achievements.........you're full of yourself.
>
> If you don't....................you're not ambitious.
>
> If she has a headache............she's tired.
>
> If you have a headache.............you don't love her anymore.
>
> If you want it too often.........you're oversexed.
>
> If you don't................there must be someone else.
>
> Men die first because they want to.
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Your Brother In Christ
          Forrest              
ROM 12:5 So we, [being] many, are one body in Christ, and every one members one of another.
Willowbirch
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« Reply #1 on: May 26, 2004, 05:47:40 PM »

So THAT'S why!  Cheesy
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"Man dreams and desires; God broods, and wills, and quickens."
Aeline
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« Reply #2 on: May 30, 2004, 02:34:03 AM »

Haha, that's beautiful.. so true too.
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Tibby
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« Reply #3 on: May 30, 2004, 03:53:18 AM »

hahaha. There is only one reason why men die first, and this board is dictated to them. Grin As I've said before, biblically, men will get to heaven half an hour early. Grin
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Was there ever a time when Common sence was common?
BUTCHA
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« Reply #4 on: June 05, 2004, 09:07:58 PM »

hahaha. There is only one reason why men die first, and this board is dictated to them. Grin As I've said before, biblically, men will get to heaven half an hour early. Grin
but im always late . sitting in the car with the kids waitting for my wife as she puts on her finishing touches Grin
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sincereheart
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"and with His stripes we are healed." Isaiah 53:5


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« Reply #5 on: June 07, 2004, 08:29:35 AM »

Man Servant Needed.....

Because of a shortage of maids, the minister's wife advertised
for a man servant. The next morning a nicely dressed young
man came to the front door.

"Can you start the breakfast by seven o'clock?" asked the minister.
"I guess so," answered the man.

"Can you polish all the silver, wash all the dishes, do the laundry, take care of the lawn, wash windows, iron clothes and keep the house neat and tidy?"

"Say, preacher," said the young fellow rather meekly, "I came
here to see about getting married -- but if it's going to be as much work as all that, you can count me out right now."
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