Joshua Harris

[Ragamuffin]

I am curious if anybody has read either I Kissed Dating Goodbye or Boy Meets Girl, both by Joshua Harris, and if so, what did you think?  My kids are much too rapidly approaching that age.  

[Tibby]

You are only going to get 2 results with “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” They will either ignore it, or use it for a few weeks, then forget about it. Good ol’ Josh has a bit older then his target Audience when he “kissed dating goodbye” and he doesn’t seem to get most of them don’t have the attention span, or  the control of their hormones, that he had when he did finally “kiss dating goodbye.” it is much easier for a 21-year-old who has experienced all the ups and downs of dating to give it up then it is for a 14-year-old with faced with his or her first pair of lips to kiss. Josh’s words will be ones of wisdom as they grow into adults, but until then, they will be excuses for not having a date on Friday night. It might be good to get them to watch/listen/read it in a Youth Group setting, maybe talk to the youth leader in your church about it.

[sincereheart]

We've read; I Kissed Dating Goodbye. We have found it to be very thought-provoking! But I would suggest you reading it first to make sure it doesn't delve into too much too soon!  

While I don't disagree with Tibby; I'm not sure I entirely agree, either. You never know what affect it might have on your children to PREVENT them from doing things they might be sorry for later! Yes, those older may be able to look back and think differently about choices they made. But those younger might think twice about dating and/or limits to set if they do date! The illustrations the author uses are simple and effective! They might just stick....

Another book along the same lines; though it's written for girls, is: The Divine Dance by Shannon Kubiak.

[Tibby]

But those younger might think twice about dating and/or limits to set if they do date!

That would have been a better approach for Josh to take. This courtship thing doesn't work well at all. I really don't think 90% of the kids who read Josh's stuff are still Courting, if they even started to begin with. I can give you at least 3 Youth Groups I was personally a member of where this is the case, and plenty more in friends churches. Mr. Harris is just too extream for the average 14 year-old. I don't care how much the kid like his stuff, when faced with a beauitful girl who wants to date him, or a cute guy who wants to go out with her, or following the Mantra of Josh, they will date.

[Psalm 119]

Tibby,

The concept of courtship is being put to practice especially within homeschool families. It is attainable! And there are young men and women who are courting, marrying, and raising families.

The world and the church has been so ingrained to the practice of dating, maybe that's why the church members don't fare much better than the world when it comes to marriage, divorce, and remarriage.

Courtship is not a new practice, but rather an old one that is proven to be tried and true.

Psalm 119

[Tibby]

The concept of courtship is being put to practice especially within homeschool families.

Yeah, in HOMESCHOOL families. Families where the parents are able to have some controll the amount of contact there childern has, and WHO they have contact with. But when we talk about the average School kid, it is a different story. For about 7 hours a day, the majority of their waking hours, those Parents have 0 controll over what there child sees, hears, and says. Homeschool kids are NOT like other kids. Studies show they are even LESS adjusted when they leave home. They may be "good kids" but they are "good kids" with issues.

Courtship is not a new practice, but rather an old one that is proven to be tried and true.

I know, I know. That was back when most kids where homeschool, too. And back then, they still had all kinds of sexually behavior. Dating didn't start, nor does to promote any kind of sexually activity. That is our own human nature. If they want to get it, they will. The format by which one finds their mate thru will not effect that.

[sincereheart]

Studies show they are even LESS adjusted when they leave home.

Wow! And what studies are you referring to? You don't even have to give specific links, just enough general information that I can search it out for myself.  

Because the studies I've read definitely show otherwise!

[Tibby]

Ironically enough, you claim to have read studies to the contrary, but do not post a link either.  

Feel free to search the web for socialization and homeschooling. The Pro- sites will blow it off as a myth, but not explaining why. They will throw out facts about Homeschoolers being better students. Being a good Student and a good Citizen are not one and the same.

[Reba]

Homeschool kids are NOT like other kids. Studies show they are even LESS adjusted when they leave home. They may be "good kids" but they are "good kids" with issues.

'Home school kids are not like other kids' Correct and Praise the Lord

Studies show they are even LESS adjusted when they leave home Less adjusted to what? to the world? angain i say Praise the Lord

They may be "good kids" but they are "good kids" with issues. This is stated as if no homeschooled kids dont have issues


With in my family i have seen good home schooling and extremly poor home  schooling.

[Tibby]

Homeschool kids are NOT like other kids. Studies show they are even LESS adjusted when they leave home. They may be "good kids" but they are "good kids" with issues.

'Home school kids are not like other kids' Correct and Praise the Lord

There you go.

Studies show they are even LESS adjusted when they leave home Less adjusted to what? to the world? angain i say Praise the Lord

A bit Gnostic, don't you think?

They may be "good kids" but they are "good kids" with issues. This is stated as if no homeschooled kids dont have issues

With in my family i have seen good home schooling and extremly poor home  schooling.

I've seen good Homeschooling and poor homeschooling, aswell. But with both, in general, the childern it produces are worse off for it.

[sincereheart]

Since you made this statement:
Studies show they are even LESS adjusted when they leave home.

I'm asking you to back it up....   YOU made the statement; YOU prove it!
What studies? Who did the studies? When were the studies done? Where did you read them? Who told you about them?

Have you ever heard about citing your sources?


Feel free to search the web for socialization and homeschooling.

I have. But thanks for the permission!  


Ironically enough, you claim to have read studies to the contrary, but do not post a link either.

You expect me to disprove what you haven't proven? Now that's an interesting take! ROFL!
Not so ironic, though, when you realize that you proved nothing that needed to be refuted..... The true irony would be making a statement and not being able to back it up. Hmmmm.... But I'll assume you actually know what you're talking about.   So with that in mind, let's go back to the original question: What studies?

By the way, if you can't prove it, just say so and we can move on....

[sincereheart]

And my apologies to Ragamuffin for the derailment of this thread.  

So I've posted some 'proof' for Tibby here:
http://forums.christiansunite.com/index.php?board=10;action=display;threadid=2763;start=msg41519#msg41519

Back on topic....
I think the books listed can be beneficial!  

[Tibby]

Since you made this statement:
Studies show they are even LESS adjusted when they leave home.

I'm asking you to back it up....   YOU made the statement; YOU prove it!
What studies? Who did the studies? When were the studies done? Where did you read them? Who told you about them?

Have you ever heard about citing your sources?


Feel free to search the web for socialization and homeschooling.

I have. But thanks for the permission!  


Ironically enough, you claim to have read studies to the contrary, but do not post a link either.

You expect me to disprove what you haven't proven? Now that's an interesting take! ROFL!
Not so ironic, though, when you realize that you proved nothing that needed to be refuted..... The true irony would be making a statement and not being able to back it up. Hmmmm.... But I'll assume you actually know what you're talking about.   So with that in mind, let's go back to the original question: What studies?

By the way, if you can't prove it, just say so and we can move on....

Very good, I’m glad you can grasp my irony. The fact that I didn’t give in studies, and that neither did you: irony. That was the WHOLE point behind it all.  

[sincereheart]

Tibby, I can't decide whether you amuse or irritate me most.  

Is it really so hard to say that you just spouted off and don't really have any basis for your statement (except for anecdotal)?  

And in case you overlooked what I thought was obvious; I DID refute your statement... anecdotally, of course!   So there was no irony for you!  

[Tibby]

Tibby, I can't decide whether you amuse or irritate me most.  

Is it really so hard to say that you just spouted off and don't really have any basis for your statement (except for anecdotal)?  

I figure, you will bash me either way, so I might as well have some fun with you. Besides, I'm a conservative, and as our motto goes: Who needs basis with you have a strong bias?

And in case you overlooked what I thought was obvious; I DID refute your statement... anecdotally, of course!   So there was no irony for you!  

As the Bronse rule says: Prove unto others as you would have them prove unto you. Why are you the only one who gets to be anecdotal? I DID post in this thread first