Bullying at schools, etc.

[Debp]

At another site I read where a woman's son is being bullied (even punched) at a Christian school!!  This is so awful to hear.....it's bad enough this kind of thing goes on at public schools let alone a Christian school.

I wish all parents would teach their children to treat others as they would want to be treated, like the Lord taught us.  Also, it would be wonderful if parents would encourage their children to befriend or at least be nice to a lonely child at school.   I know a young child that always loved school until she got totally shunned at her new school....now she doesn't want to go to school and is very sad.   (Her parents are moving back so she can attend her old school again, hopefully she will recover there.)

I hear bullying is also a big problem on the internet.....so parents please be aware of this situation.

[Forrest]

I have a friend in Richmond VA. that started a Christian school for the intercity children, they had many "rich" try to send there problem children there, many that bring up there children with a total lack of love, care, even GOD, and then where they went wrong, yet GODS Own Word says, PROV 10:13 In the lips of him that hath understanding wisdom is found: but a rod [is] for the back of him that is void of understanding.
 PROV 13:24 He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.
PROV 22:15 Foolishness [is] bound in the heart of a child; [but] the rod of correction shall drive it far from him
PROV 23:13 Withhold not correction from the child: for [if] thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.
PROV 23:14 Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell.
PROV 29:15 The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left [to himself] bringeth his mother to shame. REV 3:19 As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent.  HEB 12:9 Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected [us], and we gave [them] reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live?

                                          YBIC
                                        Forrest

[Soldier4Christ]

Many parents in todays society leave the social amenitites up to others. I have heard the many excuses: "I simply don't have the time", "I want to be a buddy to my child", "I don't want them to hate me", "They need to make their own decisions"  ....

Parents that do this are disobeying our Father, for He has told us to bring them up in the ways of the Lord.

[Forrest]

Many parents in todays society leave the social amenitites up to others. I have heard the many excuses: "I simply don't have the time", "I want to be a buddy to my child", "I don't want them to hate me", "They need to make their own decisions"  ....

Parents that do this are disobeying our Father, for He has told us to bring them up in the ways of the Lord.

 Amen, Pastor Roger. Amen.

[Debp]

I can remember being spanked once (by my mom)....basically, I guess I was a good child.  My mother also would always say she thought I knew the right thing to do...so basically, she was saying I had the judgment to make good decisions and that she trusted me.  But my mother also had faith in the Lord and she also sent me to Sunday School and church. (We also would attend Kathryn Kuhlman meetings together.)  My grandma also believed in the Lord deeply, even for healing.

So I guess the severity of the discipline depends on the temperment and the amount of disobedience by the child.  Even though I think there is nothing wrong with a spanking, we should temper the punishment according to the child.

I know a child who is such a lovely, sweet girl....she has never been spanked and there has never been a reason to do so with her.  She just is a good child and desires to do her best!  (My mom and I have been like grandmas to her since she was a baby and just talked with her about things....never a need to spank her.)  So I think with a child like this, no physical punishment is necessary.

[Soldier4Christ]

I agree with you completely, Debp. Physical punishment is not always the answer. My own daughter, now 21 yrs old with a daughter of her own, never needed spanking. Just being told that she had done wrong would send her into tears. She always tried to do what she thought would please Mom and Dad.

This is what is meant in Proverbs. We see in chapter 29 verse 15 that not only does it mention the rod but it also mentions "reproof", chastisement. This is verbal chastisement not physical. It has been a proven fact that a child whose parent has a quick hand with the rod will turn to violence also in excess or they go in the opposite direction of having no spirit. We are told:

Col 3:21  Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The original Greek word for "discouraged" means:

to be spiritless, that is, disheartened: - be dismayed.

One such child told me that he was going to be in trouble anyway so why shouldn't he go ahead and do it anyway.

There is an old saying: "Let the punishment fit the crime." It is important that we do not become overbearing as parents. To teach our children in understanding, wisdom and without anger. This is not to say that a spanking may be in order. However to spank a child when soft words will accomplish the task will only serve to break the spirit, harden the heart, and turn the child to anger.

[Debp]

I agree with you completely, Debp. Physical punishment is not always the answer. My own daughter, now 21 yrs old with a daughter of her own, never needed spanking. Just being told that she had done wrong would send her into tears. She always tried to do what she thought would please Mom and Dad.

This is what is meant in Proverbs. We see in chapter 29 verse 15 that not only does it mention the rod but it also mentions "reproof", chastisement. This is verbal chastisement not physical. It has been a proven fact that a child whose parent has a quick hand with the rod will turn to violence also in excess or they go in the opposite direction of having no spirit. We are told:

Col 3:21  Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The original Greek word for "discouraged" means:

to be spiritless, that is, disheartened: - be dismayed.

One such child told me that he was going to be in trouble anyway so why shouldn't he go ahead and do it anyway.

There is an old saying: "Let the punishment fit the crime." It is important that we do not become overbearing as parents. To teach our children in understanding, wisdom and without anger. This is not to say that a spanking may be in order. However to spank a child when soft words will accomplish the task will only serve to break the spirit, harden the heart, and turn the child to anger.

Thanks, Pastor Roger, for your further explanation about these verses, and your good counsel.

[Forrest]

Spanking is only a last resort, but there are children that will only listen then, and yes I was one, I have a nephew that was that way, but his brother was just the opposite just look at him sternly and he would brake down crying.

[Debp]

Spanking is only a last resort, but there are children that will only listen then, and yes I was one, I have a nephew that was that way, but his brother was just the opposite just look at him sternly and he would brake down crying.

Yes, isn't that the truth....children (and us, too!) are all so different!!  That's interesting about your nephew and his brother being so different, in the same family.