As By Fire

[Soldier4Christ]

As By Fire
by Kelly L. Segraves

I found myself in a large room filled to capacity with people. We were waiting for something. I knew what it was, but for some unknown reason I didn't remember at the time. It's not that I forgot, really, but I was so fascinated with the people and the room that the reason for my presence seemed secondary to my surroundings.

The room itself was enormous. I could hardly see the other end. In fact, I couldn't be sure there was another end.

But there was an end on this side which was visible to me. Yet the walls were transparent and there was nothing beyond them, nothing at all.

The floor was soft like down and fluffy like clouds giving a feeling of walking on air.

The ceiling was completely absent as it disappeared into nothingness. In reality the room did not seem like a room and yet it was... a room for waiting.

[Soldier4Christ]

As I waited, I met several people and even found a few that I had known before and still know for that matter, for some of them were friends. Yet most of them were strangers, but all of them were friendly and none of them were strange. There was a common bond and a single purpose that was felt by all. Yet each person was still an individual with his own personality and his own thoughts and his own distinct characteristics and attributes. We were alive in every aspect of life and yet, I knew we were all dead physically.

It was not the final death man dreaded but transient death as we were waiting for something to come that would change us and make us whole, yet I lacked nothing. I could walk and talk. I could see and hear. I could do all the things that life had offered for I was alive in death.

I was there in that room alive and I wasn't afraid, yet I knew that I was not where I was used to being. I was no longer an inhabitant of earth for I had been taken above. I knew I was to meet God because this place of waiting was His and His alone. I was waiting, watching and willing for my time to come. I knew it would come, for I welcomed it and wanted it. I had no apprehension for I was sure there was nothing to fear.

One by one those who were waiting left the room as their names were called, not audibly, and yet not silently, for in their minds they knew it was their turn. I knew it was their turn just as I knew it would soon be my turn to go before my Maker. I would be called in a moment or an hour or a day or a week, and I would go when I was called as if I had been the only one there and the only one called, for time was meaningless and time was not, for we had all the time in the world.

So I spent my time talking with friends, both old and new. For everyone was friendly and new acquaintances were so easy to make, especially since we were all here for the same purpose.

Of course, my old friend Johnny was there in his new body. On earth John was paralyzed in a car accident and couldn't walk, but now he was fine. There was no hint of pain and no trace of anguish in his face or body. He was a new man. Together we walked throughout the room and talked and laughed with those who were waiting.

It wasn't even amazing that John could walk, in fact, we realized that everyone here was in perfect shape physically. Those who were blind could see, the deaf could hear.

Even the extra 20 pounds I always seemed to carry was gone, my waist was slim again. I was in great shape.

Then again, I had my glorified body, as did everyone else in the room, so even this was a natural occurrence to be expected in these natural surroundings. Death was simply marvelous.

Then I saw him.

He was standing near the wall, alone in the midst of this crowd. He was quiet mannered and powerfully built, yet through that peaceful expression his rugged face clearly indicated the years he spent on earth. There were no scars and no pain and no tears in the eyes of the greatest man ever born of woman.

His name was also John. John the Baptist they called him, for he was the one who baptized the Lord and prepared the way for His coming.

We walked toward him and introduced ourselves and heard his voice. The same voice that cried out in the wilderness, that spread the news that repentance was necessary if one was to see the kingdom of heaven.

I was at the entrance to heaven, waiting to be ushered in. I was here and John was here and we were talking to a man who had lived nearly two thousand years before we were even born.

When my turn came, I heard my name clearly spoken in my mind and I turned toward a large door in the middle of the room, but on the far side. It seemed unreachable with myriad's of people between me and the exit.

I was there, however, in a few steps. It was as if all you needed to do in this land was to think about that which you wanted to accomplish and you had accomplished it.

There was an angel waiting for me. His name was Lael.

[Soldier4Christ]

I walked down a narrow corridor without any sides or ceiling. I know it's impossible to be in a corridor without walls, but I could feel them and knew they were there without being able to see them.

As we walked, I could sense openings in the non-existent sides of this tunnel and soon my curiosity got the best of me, so I asked Lael about the rooms off to the side.

"Where?" he replied.

"There," I said, sensing one to my right.

"That's quite perceptive of you to notice. Most people aren't aware of them."

"Oh!"

"Yes. In fact, you're the first to notice. At least the first to my knowledge. Assuredly there must be others who have felt their presence."

"But what are they for?"

"Entrances to the storage area for the masterworks."

"The masterworks?"

"Yes. The central monitoring complex for all the activities for humans on earth."

"What do you mean by monitoring?"

"Just what I said. The masterworks records every deed, action, and thought from birth until death of every individual who ever lived on the planet from the beginning of creation to the end of time."

"Everyone?"

"Yes, everyone."

"Wow! That must be quite a complex."

"Perhaps. I have nothing else with which to compare it. There is nothing else like it, nor will there ever be a need for its kind again."

"Has it shut down?"

"No, it is still functioning and will continue to function until the end."

"Isn't this the end?"

"For those who believe, yes. But for those who remained behind, no. Their end has not yet come."

"So the masterworks is still in operation?"

"Yes."

"May I see it?"

"I don't see why not, although I've never shown anyone before," he said questioningly. "Yes, it's all right, you may see it. Come this way," he then stated in a positively assured manner.

"Did you just check with someone?"

"Yes, with Michael.

"The archangel?"

"Yes. We are able to communicate instantly whenever necessary. That's the way we are made."

"Fascinating."

"Yes, but you, too, will learn soon enough. Come."

[Soldier4Christ]

He led me down the corridor until we came to a large opening in the side. An opening much larger than any I had felt before. I still could not see anything, nor was there anything unusual to look at. It was all nothingness and it was the same nothingness one noticed when looking at the nonexistent walls.

Lael noticed my expression and said simply, "Strange, isn't it?"

"Yes."

"You'll get used to it and understand soon enough. Come, follow me."

With that he stepped through a nonexistent section of what must have been a door, and part of him disappeared.

Not wanting to be left alone, I followed him and somehow knew I was walking through a wall. It really wasn't hard to do at all.

Lael was waiting for me inside a large room that actually looked like a room and had walls, a ceiling, and a solid floor. I was much relieved to say the least, and the smile on my host's face indicated that he was amused.

"Having fun?" he asked.

"I'm not quite sure."

"There's no need to concern yourself, you're in good care. There's nothing to worry about. It takes getting used to, that's all."

"And will I get used to it?"

"Most definitely. There's no need to doubt it."

"Thank you," I said, and we began our tour.

The room contained more machines and gadgets I didn't recognize than any room I had ever seen, or that one could imagine. There were countless angels everywhere, checking things and working with the various computations. I found, however, that the machines themselves actually did all the work, retrieving and storing the information.

In a way it was like a giant computer room, although it was far more advanced than anything man could or would for that matter, ever conceive. There were different functions for every machine and yet they were all linked together into a singleness of purpose and were controlled by the hands of God.

That's what amazed me. The complete simplicity of all this complexity. It was true, every life was known from the beginning to the end, everyone and everything. That's how complete the system was.

When a child was conceived, a record was created and a template established. At birth the masterworks began to record everything that happened to that child, and was done by that child. Every thought and every action and every notion were all recorded, even from infancy.
Lael told me that every child conceived of man and born of woman was born with a bent to wrong doing and sinful acts. Each child would also show evidence of his sinful nature so early in life that we humans could not even imagine it taking place at such an age. "These are truly the descendants of Adam," he would say. "Only the Son of God who was conceived of the Holy Ghost was born without sin. Only the Son of God," he said.

I knew what he said was true, but I hadn't realized the depths to which the Lord had gone to establish that fact and to keep records of the existence of sin in the world. But that's not all.
God also monitored the thoughts and deeds for all of a man's life, as a baby, child, youth, and adult. Every event was known and God could easily see and demonstrate, if asked, whether a man or woman ever accepted the salvation He so clearly offered through His Son, the Lord Jesus Christ.

When a person accepted the Lord as his personal Savior, repented of his sin and realized that Jesus Christ died on the cross as payment for the sins of mankind and rose again from the grave to prove He was God, so as to provide man with hope by His demonstration of a life to come after death, his life was changed and the monitoring system was altered. All because of Christ.

A person who accepted Christ began again with a clean slate, so to speak. All the thoughts and deeds and notions he had from birth up until the time he asked Christ into his heart were completely erased and removed from his record. In fact, his name was written in the Book of Life and was recorded as a new birth with a new entry and a new system for monitoring.
Now the Holy Spirit had entered the life and the power was there for living for the Lord without sin as God had intended man to live. Of course, there was the provision for confessing one's sins if sin entered the life and disrupted the fellowship God had wanted and planned. Thus, the new system recorded all the thoughts and deeds and notions and also took into account the attitudes and motives involved.

When a person became a new creature in Christ and experienced this new birth, the Holy Spirit entered and the life and heart were cleansed from sin. In this case, the life was perfect and all deeds and thoughts and actions were in tune with what God had intended for man and thus, they earned special rewards. When the attitude was wrong or the motives out of perspective, sin was back in the life and the Holy Spirit was no longer in control.

With self in control of a man's life, sin ruled and the actions, deeds, and thoughts were not in accord with God's plan. As long as sin ruled, no rewards could be earned, and the system monitored the sins that were destroying fellowship with God. For some, this state of being lasted for the rest of the Christian's life, and no attempt was made by the believer to confess his sin. Thus, no rewards were earned and the child of God remained out of fellowship until he met God as I was about to do. When he confessed his sins, each one confessed was compared with the record and then was forgiven. This meant that the slate was wiped clean and the sin was forgotten, as if it had never occurred. When all sins were confessed, the Spirit was back in control of the person's life and he was back in fellowship with God.

Again, there was a wide variance in individuals' tracks. Some would confess their sin daily or as they occurred and remained in fellowship. Others would wait weeks, or even months, quenching the Spirit. Obviously it was best to remain in fellowship and constantly beware of the old sin nature. This fellowship allows the Lord to reveal unconfessed sins to oneself through His Spirit in order that they might be confessed and eliminated.

Great things can be accomplished through the Christian who has confessed his sins and is walking in the Spirit in full fellowship with God the Father through the Lord Jesus Christ.

Obviously this is what should take place and what should be.

The great majority of the logs revealed, however, that confession didn't take place regularly. An even greater majority indicated that there was no belief in Jesus Christ at all in the lives of those being monitored.

Both the saved and the unsaved, the believer and the unbeliever, the Christian and the non-Christian, had their very lives and thoughts monitored constantly by the masterworks system. It was a staggering thought and one that concerned me greatly, for I now wondered how I would fare in what was to come.

[Soldier4Christ]

I realized that I was to face God soon and answer to Him for what I had done with my life. I wasn't sure how I stood, but I realized that there was nothing that I could do now to change the record. My life was there as well and all my thoughts were known by God. My actions were bad enough at times, but my thoughts...

I knew it was going to be hard. I wasn't sure, and in fact, I was concerned that I hadn't taken the time to confess all to God. What had I left out? Could there be any part of my life that had earned rewards? Or was my life all for naught and for my own gain and selfish reasons?

Lael noticed my concern and told me that my record was there. Soon I would have the answers to my questions. He also said I was right in my assumption that it was too late, for indeed it was.

If I had only thought about it on earth and realized the seriousness of every thought and deed. I would have done differently, I know I would have. Now my life was gone and I had to live with the results of my actions. I had to live with them forever.

A life that should be full of adventure and achievements for God, a full record so to speak, might only have a few brief excerpts that were acceptable. Sin in my life could have and maybe had, for that matter, marred my eternal well-being. There were so many short logs. So many lives with little left to show their Maker. What was mine like? I would have to give that some thought. I definitely wanted to know before I came before God.

"What will be will be," said Lael. "There is no changing it now."

"I know."

"Then at least relax and be thankful that you are here in this eternal place. So few people have made the right decision, as you can see from their tapes."

"Yes, that's true. Thank you, Lael."

"There's no need for thanks. I was merely pointing out the obvious. There is no room for self-pity here."

"I understand."

"Do you?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Good. Shall we continue?"

"You mean there's more?"

"Yes."

"Then let's go on."

I was still quite reserved and very concerned, but what Lael showed me next was a large bank of additional recorders which were linked into the masterworks.

"What are these for, Lael?"

"Prayer."

"Prayer?"

"Yes, prayer. When a request is made it is logged into the memory, checked against the log of the one requesting and then answered if the criteria are met."

"What criteria?"

"No unconfessed sin and no lack of belief."

"That's all?"

"Yes. But isn't that enough?"

"I don't understand."

"Well, God wants you to have whatever you want. Remember He promised to give you the desires of your heart."

"But I always thought that there was a catch to it. Certain requirements. Something like His will or something."

"And what is the will of God?"

"I don't really know."

"Don't You?"

" I'm not sure."

"Think about it. What does the Word say?"

"That every Christian should go to Africa and be a missionary or become a pastor?"

"No. That's not what it says, nor is that necessarily the will of God, although most people think so."

"Then what is it, Lael? Tell me."

"Well, first of all it's not God's will that any should perish, but He wants every man to be saved."

"OK, I remember that, but all men won't be saved, they just won't believe."

"True, but that doesn't alter God's will. He still wants all men to come to Him. Like I said, that's what the general will of God is, that no one should perish, but that all should come to repentance"

"All right. But what about the Christian, the one who has accepted Jesus Christ?"

"The will of God is the same. That he live his life in fellowship with God and be available to accomplish the greater goal of bringing men and women to repentance."

"Then they have to be missionaries or preachers to be in His will."

"No. Every Christian is already a missionary or a bearer of the Good News. What he does with the gospel and how he shares it is the criterion for reward for faithful service. And again, unconfessed sin is the key. If you are living your life in fellowship with God, you are in His will and available to His service because you are attuned to His desire and are thus in His will."

"And how does this relate to prayer?"

"It's simple, really. For one who is in fellowship with God can have that which he wants, simply by asking God for it and believing that God will give it to him."

"Anything?"

"Yes, anything. If you believe it, it's yours."

"Then why didn't I have..."

"Did you ask?"

"Yes."

"But did you believe?"

"I don't know."

"Well, did you ask for the same thing every day?"

"In a way, yes."

"Didn't you realize that every time you asked for the same thing again and again you were admitting to God that you didn't believe the first time. You see, your repetition only showed your unbelief. Had you prayed to God believing, you would have thanked Him and praised Him for the answer you knew He was sending."

"You really mean that?"

"Yes. I see it in action constantly. You see, when a prayer comes to God, He hears it. He knows the heart of the individual and whether it is pure or not. Also He knows the mind of the individual and his attitudes. He can tell if you believe or are just reciting words or wishes. If you believe, and ask He will answer you. This is His promise. When you ask, He hears it and sends the answer."

"Then I could have had anything if only I believed and asked."

"Yes. That was His promise."

"But so many people say that God answers prayers by saying yes, no, or wait."

"Did you notice you said, `people say'?"

"Yes."

"Well, that's the problem. People say a lot of things, but it's only what God says that matters. He says ask believing and you shall receive that which you have asked for. That's all there is to it."

"It all sounds so simple."

"It is. Only man makes things difficult. Somehow he can't bring himself to trust God and believe what God says."

These last words of Lael's really struck home with me. I realized how much I had listened to man and failed to believe that God would and could supply all my needs, had I only taken the time to seek Him. It was sad to find out that God had the power and that all His power, might and resources were at my disposal if I had only believed.

Now that I was here, I could easily see what I had missed, because I had limited God and listened to man. I would love to try again, have a second chance knowing what I know now. But, it was too late.

Even Lael knew that since he had reminded me once before. Still I couldn't help wondering what my life could have been like if I had only known before. Lael's next comment really shook me.

"You could have known," he said as if he knew my thoughts.

"What?"

"I said, you could have known, for all I have told you was in His Word all the time. All you had to do was listen, accept what you read, and apply it."

"Yes, but..."

"That was your problem. There are no `buts' with the Bible. You are simply to accept what God said and live as if you believed His every word. I'm sure you've heard preachers preach about belief, but I'm afraid even many of them have a head belief only. They never truly took the words of God to heart and applied them to themselves."

I had to admit that what Lael had just said was true. Very true indeed. I had heard the words, I had even read them, but I never really applied them to my life or felt that they were intended for me.

I never felt I was good enough to have God bless me. It was all right to hear of God performing miracles for someone else, but I never applied what I heard to my own life. It was always for someone else. I never applied the knowledge I had of God to my own situation. I somehow thought I could make it on my own.

I knew now how wrong I was and what a terrible fool I had been to refuse to use that which God intended for me to use, and have.

As I pondered these things and considered my folly, Lael motioned for me to follow him, and so I did.

[Soldier4Christ]

"This last area," he said, "is the comparison department of the masterworks. It is here that all life records are compared to the memory logs of the Father."

"What memory logs?"

"The thoughts and deeds and notions of every individual ever born and yet to be born were recorded by God Himself and left for comparison long before the world was ever made."

"You mean that God knew what I would do before the creation of the world?"

"Yes."

"But how can that be?"

"God simply looked into the future, and foresaw the life, minds, thoughts and notions of the individual. Thus He was able to know who would accept His Son as Saviour and who would reject."

"But why would He want to know?"

"In order to plan for the future I suppose. How else would He be able to determine the size of heaven and the space requirements of hell. Besides, such an exercise demonstrates His power and only further substantiates the fact that He alone is God."

"What is done with the records that God has made?"

"They are compared with the actual events and thoughts of each individual life."

"And?"

"They always match up in every way with no deviation or changes whatever."

"Always?"

"Always. There has never been a change. The records are always identical."

"Fascinating."

"Yes, that it is."

"Then it was known that I would accept Christ personally before Adam came into existence, before the earth was even formed?"

"Exactly. That's why you were chosen to be here as one of God's elect."

"What do you mean?"

"Exactly what I said. That God chose those who He knew would accept and placed them in His book as the elect ones, one of the chosen ones of God."

"Imagine that!"

"And everyone that He knew would be here is here. He has always been right. I have no doubt that He will always continue to be right as long as time exists, now and in eternity forever."

"It certainly demonstrates who He is, doesn't it?"

"Yes, it does that. But did you ever have cause to doubt who He is?"

"Well, no. But I never applied all that I knew."

"I'm sorry to hear that."

"I was sorry to learn it myself."

And I was. The more I saw here the more I realized how I had neglected to apply the fact of God and who He was to my life. The fact that He chose me before the foundation of the earth and knew my very thoughts and actions, yet that He allowed me the choice over what I did and how I used His Word and His power was an amazing concept. Yet this concept was so simple and so logical once you realized that God was truly God.

Lael and I talked a while longer and then he led me again into that long narrow corridor which led to God and to His Son. This time I wasn't as confident as I had been before and I feared that all would not go as well as I would have liked. I already knew my life fell short of what it could have or even should have been. I didn't know what to expect. I'm not sure I was really afraid, but I knew I was definitely apprehensive.

I knew now that judgment was coming and I was to be judged for what I had done for my Lord. The final purpose for which I was here had finally hit me and I knew I wasn't prepared. Somehow I had always felt that the Christian didn't have to worry after death, that all would be rosy for him and there would be no need for fear or for concern. However, after viewing the masterworks and seeing first-hand the great care in which all this data on my life was accumulated and evaluated, I realized that the only reason for such a system would be for my own accountability for what I had done on earth. The day of accountability was at hand. Lael led me from the corridor into a great and mighty hall that was definitely a hall but had no sides and no feeling of closeness in any way.

There were many people lining the walls, where walls would be expected, and there was a great host of people off to the side and near the front. I couldn't see the front clearly, but I was almost certain that there were steps leading to a throne.

A moment later I was sure of it. There definitely was a throne in front and I could see that the Lord was sitting there upon it. The hour had come.

[Soldier4Christ]

In majestic splendor, with gold and silver hues surrounding the throne, the Lord sat in judgment of this heavenly host of believers.

I was surprised at the attitudes of those around me. Most were unconcerned as the tone of the fellow who approached me would indicate.

"Hey, how's it going?"

"Fine, I guess."

"This is something else, isn't it?"

"Well, I..."

"I mean, look at all the fantastic sights, will ya'?"

"Aren't you concerned about the judgment?"

"What's to be concerned about. We're Christians so it's going to be all right. There's nothing to fear."

"But what about your deeds..."

"What's with you, fellow? This is heaven. All that's behind us now."

"But..."

"No buts, we're in glory and there's nothing to fear so enjoy it."

"Still, there's the judgment."

"Just a formal ceremony for passing out rewards, that's all. Nothing to worry about."

"But I've seen the masterworks..."

"So you've seen it. What's the big deal? This is simply the beginning to our bright and glorious future in heaven. So relax, kid. Take it easy. I'll see you around."

Relax, he said. That's probably why this judgment is necessary. Guys like him who feel that everything's a gravy train. Surely everyone didn't feel that way, yet there was so little concern on the faces of each of the ones who were present, that I had to wonder if I was overwrought and overly concerned.

Then I saw clearly what was taking place. Fear grabbed my mind and held it in a vice-like grip. I knew now that I wasn't wrong. I was sure of it and because of that sureness I was afraid of what was to come.

At the head of the line each individual was handed a bundle which contained the sum of all that his life had accomplished for his Lord and Master, Jesus Christ.

The record of his life was played and all that had occurred before he was a Christian was naturally missing, and all that he had done while out of fellowship with the Lord was also gone from the record. All that was left was the time that individual had spent while in fellowship and under the control of the Holy Spirit.

What he had done out of fellowship counted only toward rewards in his earthly life. What he thought he accomplished for his Master often produced only wood, hay, stubble and other building materials. However, the times the individual lived under the control of the Holy Spirit were reflected in the gold, silver, gems and other precious metals contained in the bundles.

No one knew what his bundle contained. Now I knew how its contents were determined and knew the length that God had gone to clearly to determine the worth of each individual life.

The fairness and totality of His evaluation was amply displayed to me in the masterworks and every life was completely known. All that was left was this day of reckoning.

In reality, that's what this day was. It was a day of reckoning where each life, each Christian life, was placed in the balance and every thought, action, deed, and motive was known for what it actually was and not for what it may have seemed on earth.

Judgment by a fair and righteous Judge, but judgment also in a fair and righteous manner. For there was no margin for error, no human frailty or partiality on the part of the Judge. No favoritism. All was clearly known and seen. The results had already been determined on earth by each of us as we lived each day. What we lived was what we got. How we lived determined our fate. Even as Christians we were accountable for what we had done on earth.

Tragic as that seemed, I knew that it was only right that I be accountable for my life. After all, there had been a world to win. There had been treasures in heaven to be gained. There was eternity hanging in the balance and I again had chosen my direction and my future destiny.

Oh, I was already a Christian. I already knew the Lord, but each day I had a new choice to make, even each hour. I either followed my Lord to His glory or my own self to my own frustration. Each day I had chosen and now I would receive my just reward and pay the toll for what I had sown. The reaping and the Reaper were at hand.

When a bundle was received one couldn't see what it contained. With weary, trembling hands, a man or a woman would carry that package into the fire of His great power. Some bundles were large, others small, some nearly non-existent, but all could be carried.

With slow deliberate steps, the bundle was carried toward the steps of the throne and into the truth of His almighty flame.

The fire proceeded out of the mouth of judgment and the flames engulfed the life and the package of life's accomplishments. All were consumed by the flame, but the person was always unharmed. Only the bundle changed.

The wood and hay would be burned forever, the stubble would dissolve in the fervent heat. They were no more.

The gold and silver, however, were forged into precious crowns covered with what gems were available. Each crown was individualistic in its style and design, for it comprised the net worth of a life lived for Christ. All that was left was all that mattered.

Forged by the flames, there was now an eternal soul, clothed in His righteousness. There was now an eternal soul cleansed forever by His perfect sacrifice on the cross. There was now an eternal soul standing before His throne and holding the sum total of his earthly life for presentation to his Lord.

Each life and each reward were different, but all were placed before the feet of the Lord Jesus Christ. All entered into His love and rest forever. Eternity awaited them and with their gifts to Him came their eternal reward.

None knew what to expect from this time on, but each realized the difference that came over one who had stepped through the fire into the eternal beyond. It was a solemn occasion. As I came closer to receiving the results of my own life, I began to hear conversations from within the fire. Conversations between God and man, between the Master and the servant, between the Lord and the one who stood before Him.

"But, Lord, I have served you. I've always tried to do what you required."

"And what did I require?"

"I didn't drink or smoke or swear. I didn't run with the wrong crowd. I never attended wild parties or sexual orgies."

"Yes, but those are things you did to ease your own conscience. Things you said you gave up in order to please Me. Yet I required none of that. My Spirit lived within you and would have guided you along the proper way had you only allowed Him control. Your desires would have changed, your wants would have been different.

"You should have sought Me and My power to help others around you. Your life could have been used to bring others to Me that they might have been spared the horrors of hell. Instead you were too concerned with what you gave up and with your sacrifice, to realize that what I offered you was a gain and not a millstone.

"You see, I came to give you peace and joy, not to make you miserable. Your concern over what you gave up, over your sacrifice and your duties blinded you to the real issues involved. Didn't I purchase you with a price?"

"Yes."

"Was not my blood sufficient sacrifice to purchase your soul?"

"Yes."

"Then why didn't you freely give to Me that which I paid for on the cross? Why didn't you believe and trust and give Me all? Why only token service and false sacrifice?"

"I don't know, Lord. I felt that I was doing the right thing."

"So many who come here, stand as you do now. They come feeling they have done well because they gave up so much. Don't you remember the words of Paul?"

"Which words?"

"That to truly live is to live for Me, in My strength and power, and that even death is a gain."

"Yes, I remember those words."

"Then why didn't you apply them to your own life. Nothing you gave up compared to what you had within you had you only applied the power. Nothing would have been a loss, but you would have gained all.

"Do you remember when you asked me to come into your life and cleanse you from your sin?"

"Yes."

"And do you remember sharing with your mother that which happened to change your life and the total joy and peace that was yours when she, too, called on Me to forgive her sins and make her whole?"

"Yes, Lord. I remember."

"Then why didn't you continue to share that new-found faith and continue in My joy and peace? Why did you heed the words of the evil one who told you that you had done enough, that you had given up so much and done your part?

"You were Mine, but you refused to allow Me to work in your life. How I ached for you and craved to be your Master that I might have given you the desires of your heart. That I might have given you the joy and peace you wanted and showed you beyond a shadow of a doubt that I came to give, not to take. For you see, I knew your heart and your desires, wants and needs. I wanted to give you all, but you stood in the way. Your attitude of self-sacrifice kept you from receiving that which I longed to give you.

"You could have done much for you had much to offer, but you have made it into the kingdom of eternity and you are welcome. I accept what you have to offer, the sum of your life of service.

"Come now and enter - eternity awaits you. You are truly welcome. Come and enter as a child of My Father's."

"Thank you, Lord. I'm sorry."

"Enter and find peace."

cont'd

[Soldier4Christ]

It is true that we had made it and were bound for eternity here with our Lord in heaven. The next event would be the grand feast where the Bride and the Bridegroom unite in joy and happiness forever. That would be later. The time before us was hard and as I've said, I was totally unprepared for what was taking place. From what I heard from the fire, the others were unprepared as well.

"Lord, I have served you well."

"Yes, but there is one thing that you lack."

"What is it, Lord?"

"That one besetting sin which has hindered your service and kept you from Me all these years."

"What sin is that, Lord?"

"You know what it is. I don't need to say it."

"But, Lord, I've kept it under control."

"True, but you kept it in and that is the problem. I promised to take all your sins to the depths of the deepest ocean, to separate them from you as far as the east is from the west, but you kept this sin. You've held on to it and played with it and it has separated you from My love."

"But, Lord, it was such a small thing. Look what I have done for You in Your name."

"You have done much, and much glory would I give if I could, but that small sin you talk about has eaten away your reward, for you love that one sin more than you love Me.

"Your insistence at harboring that one sin and caressing it and bringing it out in the open when you were alone and felt it was safe, only shows your lack of total trust and belief in Me. Thus, it negates much of what you have done and has separated us on many occasions. For I see the heart and know your thoughts and even when no man knows, I know. That has been your downfall."

"Yet I have confessed that sin to you, Lord. I have turned it over to you many times."

"Yes, but you openly and flagrantly sinned, knowing it was wrong and knowing you would confess. You had your pleasure deliberately and then tried to appease your conscience by asking forgiveness knowing full well that you would continue to sin. In fact, in some cases you were planning your next lustful episode at the same time you were confessing your guilt.

"Didn't you realize that your motives, even in confession, were known to Me and I could see that your heart wasn't pure? That this sin meant more to you than the cleansing of your eternal soul?"

"Yes, Lord. I see that now."

"It's sad that you failed to recognize the fact that the pleasure of sin lasts only for a season, but the contentment of eternal satisfaction lasts forever."

"Nevertheless, you have accepted the grace of My Father and there is a place prepared for you in His glory. Enter and find His peace."

Again, this life, this soul that had tried so hard, failed to recognize the folly of sin. I too, had my hidden sins and was aware that the same fate awaited me.

There were still other voices from the fire, other lives to be evaluated by the eternal Lamb of God.

"All this I have done in your name, Lord. I have held great meetings and preached Thy Word that others might know who You are."

"Yes, and you have preached well. Many have come because of the strength of your message."

"Then why is my bundle so small? Why the hay and stubble? I'm a preacher. Your servant."

"Yes, you are a preacher and a successful one. Successful in the sight of men but in My sight you have failed the test."

"But where Lord? Where did I fail?"

"You failed to apply that which you preached to your own life. You preached because you liked to preach, as if the sound of your own voice gave meaning to your life. You preached with strong conviction in your voice but your heart was weak and empty.

"Knowing what to say and how to say it is not enough. Being able to stand apart from the crowd and point out the flaws and weaknesses of men and point them to God is of no value to your immortal soul unless you apply to yourself that which you proclaim. For preachers also are men and as men they, too, need the Word of God etched into their lives.

"The mere words of truth you proclaimed have reaped much fruit, for your words were sound and your message pure, but you yourself were afraid that I might fail if you put Me to the test. To you, being a preacher was more important than being a servant of God. You put your position ahead of your faith. I alone can heal. I alone can perform miracles and save lives. I have all power, but I gave you a full measure of it and you were afraid. Afraid to try, afraid to use it least you fail.

"For the preacher that you are, you were afraid to put Me to the test. To you it was words, a holy book, an ancient message and a God who was too small.

"You preached well and for that I am glad, but you heeded not the reality of that which you proclaimed and you neglected to apply the truth that came out of your mouth.

"You have accomplished much, but you could have done so much more. For the world has yet to see all My power and to experience all that there is. I have searched for a man who will accept all I have and proclaim believing that which I would have him preach and you could have been that man had you fully believed yourself.

cont'd

[Soldier4Christ]

"My heart goes out to you and yet you have brought even this upon yourself. If only you had been willing to put Me to the test - to trust in Me and to lean not on your own understanding."

"Lord, I..."

"Enough has been said. Your tears indicate your sorrow and your choked voice your grief, but there is no second chance. I wish there were, for you could have been My joy.

"Enter now and find My rest. There is room for you. You will find many whom you have led here. Enter and have peace."

The consoling words of the Lord in judgment may have eased the pain. I know not for sure as my time had not yet come. Still, I could feel the horror of a Christian life torn apart by the piercing eyes of the almighty Judge, tested by the flames of truth.

Yet I know that each of us had brought this upon himself. I had always heard that my sins would find me out, but I felt that I might be able to get away with them. Of course, when my time on earth was over I felt I was free. After all, death meant eternal life, which is a joy, peace, and happiness in heaven. After all, I was a Christian.

I hadn't reckoned on this accounting. Sin unconfessed is the devil's tool which, like a cancer, voids the benefits of the Spirit and quenches His effectiveness. The real tragedy lies in the fact that we allow it and rationalize it and even harbor it and enjoy it. Yet sin is sin.

It can be brazen or it can be subtle, but every sin destroys and leads away from God. If I could only try again, I know my life could be different. Everyone's life could be, but for now they all seemed the same. Their lives were tried by the fire and found wanting. Soon I would join them. For now I waited and listened.

"Lord, You know my heart. I've always wanted to serve You."

"Yes, but there is more to do than just merely wanting. There's more than just getting ready."

"But I've been preparing to serve you ever since I was a Christian."

"True, but what have you actually done? What have you accomplished?"

"Well..."

"Yes?"

"Well, I studied a lot and attended church and went to Bible studies twice a week and prayer meetings. I've read almost every book on living the Christian life that's ever been written. Why, I've read..."

"Yes, you have and it is good to read, but have you ever applied what you learned in all those books."

"Well, I've evaluated them and studied the Scriptures and the principles involved, and I've compared the statements in each and can argue the do's and the don'ts of them. I tell everyone to read this and to read that. I'm always bringing books for friends and telling them what they need."

"But have you ever thought about your own needs?"

"Well, of course. Why do you think I read all those books?"

"Why did you?"

"To be prepared, of course. Why, I have to get rid of the old sin nature and to be filled with the Spirit and know my Bible so I can witness to others. Boy, the job of witnessing I'm going to do!"

"But it's too late now."

"Well, it wouldn't have been. I was almost ready."

"So you almost accomplished something. My dear woman, your desires were fine, but you never fulfilled them. There was always some new book or some new problem to solve, some hang-up that you felt you had to master or gain control over. There was always something.

"Had you only realized that dependence on Me and My Spirit was the answer, you could have been such a witness to your friends and neighbors, not to mention your own family.

"But instead, you looked at their faults and bought them a book and told them this would solve their problems."

"What's wrong with that?"

"Nothing, if they hadn't been able to see the same problems in you. For you hadn't learned and the books didn't help because you depended on them rather than on Me.

"Books are good and serve a great purpose, but they only point to the solution which is total dependence on Me and My Spirit.

Each author may have found a way to help you see that truth, but you need not read every book and argue every difference and debate every issue. You need instead to yield yourself to Me and be available to My service. This constant soul searching and inward looking glass that you have used to make yourself ready has been your crutch and thus you never were ready, never were available to serve or to be of service.

"Since people watched your life and saw no change, since they knew of your craving for these good worthwhile books, but recognized the fact that you weren't helped, they weren't helped. That's the tragedy of all tragedies, for you knew the truth but failed to use it.

"Your knowledge is commendable but your use of it absurd, for you never used it. You must depend on Me and be yielded to Me. You must. What you learn from Me and glean from books must also be used for some purpose. You must apply it, but you must also depend on My Spirit and be available to my service.

"In this you have failed, but still you are welcome for you did accept Me as your Saviour. I know My words are harsh, but you could have done so much. Instead you have done very little."

Here was another life examined and found lacking. There was so much study and so much training, but with few results. Here truly was another tragedy.

Obviously, there was nothing wrong with study, but even this could become an obsession which kept one from serving the Lord. I knew from my own life that often I felt inadequate and would read, study, brood, worry, feel inadequate and helpless. Yet, had I turned that problem over to the Lord, He would have solved it. This was especially true in my marriage. I can think of all kinds of problems this new-found truth would have solved. Had I only turned it over to the Lord, things would have been different. Books alone weren't the answer, nor were the gimmicks or special programs. Only the Lord, He alone was the answer.

If only I could have my life to live over it would be different. I knew now what I lacked, and I had seen enough to know what was in store for me. That, of course, is impossible for I'm next in line, only one to go.

[Soldier4Christ]

The woman in front of me picked up her bundle, which wasn't very large as bundles go. She smiled and thanked the angel in attendance and stepped happily toward the fire.

There was joy on her face and in her soul as she stood before the Lord in judgment.

Her bundle, though small, was pure. There was no hay or stubble, no wood or perishable items. Her life was a gem and her record gave every indication of a rich full life worthy of great reward.

There were gaps and breaks which I knew indicated sin, but this kindly woman had searched her heart and confessed those sins to stay close in fellowship with her Lord. Her prayers indicated she asked the Spirit to reveal to her even hidden sins so as to keep her heart holy and pure for her Master's service.

There were many who found the Lord through her prayers and her faithful witness for the Saviour. She was concerned only with reaching others. It's true, she read a lot and studied. However, she always asked the Lord to teach her from her study and reading that she might truly apply what she learned, in order to be a more effective witness.

She was attuned and available to the Lord's leading. This is what it truly means to be a Christian, to be available, in fellowship and ready to do what God desires.

She wasn't rich on earth, but God supplied all her needs and she received all that she asked for. If she had any fault it was not asking enough, but I could see she was content. Her bundle was small, but even so, it produced a crown made from pure gold. Her hands were barely able to contain what her life had produced. The crown itself had seven points and was jeweled with sapphires, diamonds, rubies, and emeralds of the finest quality.

There were few words exchanged, for the Lord had paid for her sins and she had cast all her cares on Him. This could be easily determined from watching.

The joyful tears and loving smile on the Lord's face as she laid her trophy before Him were something I'll always cherish and remember. He said simply, "Well done, my good and faithful servant. Welcome home."

With that He stepped down and embraced her with the warmest welcome I have ever witnessed. He then led her up the stairs to the same entrance which the others had used when their time in the fire was over. The Lord, however, walked with this dear lady and told her about the place He had prepared for her. It sounded like a very special place indeed.

[Soldier4Christ]

Now it was my turn to meet my Maker. I was quite pleased at the bundle that was handed to me for it was of great size as bundles go. I felt quite satisfied. However, there was little joy on my face and great apprehension in my heart as I entered the flames.

I knew the fire was hot, but there was no harm to my body or soul. It was only life which was affected. There was little hay and only a few fragments of wood. Each burned quickly in the fire and were consumed by the flames.

The bulk of my life seemed to have become blocks which at first glowed with the hue of gold but soon melted and revealed the stubble of which they were made. Fool's gold, that's what it was. Truly in life I was a fool.

I had trusted God and believed in His Son Jesus Christ, but I never applied what He had said to me personally. Yes, it's true, I always thought about others and how they needed God and His power. Yet I felt I could do it by myself. In fact, I thought I was helping God out by not bothering Him. After all, I could do it and I did.

There were many I had led to the Lord and many accomplishments, but the Lord showed me where I was wrong. He showed me why I had failed. It's strange how our motives differ and how varied and ingenious are the ways man has of robbing himself of God's blessings. Pride is a foolish thing, and I was the king of fools. I knew it but refused to recognize it while there was still time.

The Lord just said to me gently and lovingly, "You already know, don't you?"

"Yes, Lord. I know. I've been a fool and tried to do it all myself and for my own reasons. I know already."

"I'm sorry. You meant so much to Me and I wanted to help you, but you wouldn't have it."

"If only I had my life to live again it would be different."

"I know. I would that I could grant that request, but it's impossible. You yourself realize that."

"Yes, I know that too."

"Then come, it is time."

As I stood there alone I recognized His power but like the others before me, I also felt His deep love. I saw Him as my Lord, my Saviour and my Judge, yet He was the same. No man could say anything before such a one. No one in heaven or earth had any control over what was now taking place.

I had already determined what was to take place and I had condemned myself by my actions on earth. Now I had to live with the results of that which my life had wrought.

I stood before Him alone as every other Christian must stand. No one could speak out in my behalf, no man could help me. If I had wronged anyone, he couldn't even accuse me, for all was already re-corded. The Lord knew what had taken place, both how and why. He knew my heart, my mind, and my soul.

My bundle which had been large, melted before my eyes. The coating of gold that covered the stubble, which was my life, formed a small crown that fit into the palm of my hand. There were no jewels and no precious stones. Even the points of the crown were barely visible.

The opening of the crown that would normally go on the head was so small that none of my fingers could wear it as a ring. I was ashamed, yet I was a believer. I had made it to heaven and I did have eternal life. I had been tried but made it to Heaven as by fire.

All my life was wasted and my Christian walk a shambles, for I accomplished nothing. It was all for naught. Only what was done for Christ would last and all I had was a tiny crown that I could hold in my fist. A tiny crown.

Slowly I walked and placed it where all other rewards were placed, at the feet of my Lord. He had given His all for me. He had died for my sins. He had suffered and bled and faced the shame of crucifixion by mortals. This was all I had for Him.

I tried to look up into His face, but I couldn't, I couldn't.

I just knelt beneath Him with tears, my heart wailing in sorrow. This small crown was all I had for my Lord.

When I opened my eyes and they focused from the tears, the room was gone. The judgment was over. The throne was no more.

Instead, I saw myself asleep and I knew I had not yet died. I was still on earth and all this had been a dream. Not a bad dream, but a worthwhile glimpse of where I was headed.

I got it. I received a second chance. I received a chance to live my life as that precious woman had lived hers. I received a chance to yield myself to the Lord and live as He intended me to live. I could depend on Him, confess my sin to Him and have fellowship with Him daily. No...hourly...constantly. I could have fellowship constantly with my Lord and Saviour. I now had another chance to live my life perfect before Him, without spot, blameless, to sin not, as He said.

A new leaf...a second chance...and it was mine. I knew that all I had seen was true. I knew that if I had died then or if the rapture came, my life would have that same end. I knew now that Christians must beware of the judgment to come.
Slowly I drifted back inside myself and became a part of the dream and a part of myself. I had only to wake and begin again. I had only to repent and live for Christ while there's still time.

I awoke and found myself in a large room filled to capacity with people. We were waiting for something.

I knew what it was.

For other foundation can no man lay than that is laid, which is Jesus Christ. Now if any man build upon this foundation gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, stubble; Every man's work shall be made manifest; for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man's work of what sort it is. If any man's work abide which he hath built thereupon, he shall receive a reward. If any man's work shall be burned, he shall suffer loss: but he himself shall be saved; yet so as by fire.

I Corinthians 3:11-15.