Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment
community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast
infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly.
He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin.
Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including
Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty
Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch.
The grave site was piled high with flours.
Aunt Jemima sang "You'll Be Going Up" and delivered the eulogy and
lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded.
Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled
with turnovers.
He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his
dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little
flaky at times he still was a crusty old man and was considered a roll model for millions.
Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, two children, John and Jane
Dough, and they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly
father, Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20
minutes.