I would like to share how I came to the Lord.
I have been a christian for 16 years. I was brought up as a catholic, I knew who Jesus was but never had a personel relationship with him. I left the church at 15 for I felt that it had nothing to offer me and what was being taught was not what I felt true.
My life has been a succussion of tradgies which broke me. I had a family who physicaly abused me and I never felt loved, I was put into a children home from the age of nine till I was eighteen. I made many bad choices looking for love and felt that I would never find it. Through these bad choices I was raped on a few occasions and sexually assulted. I married at nineteen and had my first child, by the time I was twenty nine I had four children. I was abused physicaly and sexually by my first husband. I believed that this was my lot in life, I felt that in some way I was being punished. By the time my oldest daughter was 14 I found out that she and two other my older daughters were being sexually abused by my husbands father and it had been going on for many years. Needless to say our marriage came to an end due to this and having a special needs daughter.
I was left on my own, fearfull and heartbroken. I carried guilt and shame, I felt a failure as a mother and a wife. Again I went in blindly into another relationship which was full of emotional and verbal abuse, you might say why did you stay, I had nowhere to go with four children. I had a further two children, I was working and trying to support the whole family. I was the breadwinner. By the time my youngest was two my father in - law of my second husband died. He became depressed and took his anger and guilt out on me even more. I came to breaking point. I wanted to die, life had become to much for me to bear.
This is were Jesus comes in, I met him in 1989 at a Billy Graham crusade. I gave my life to him that evening. I was scared but I knew that Jesus was calling me. I did not feel anything that evening just a sense of peace.
The next ,morning I went to church and I was prayed for to recieve the Holy Spirit. This was my special encounter with Jesus. He filled me with his love, a love that I had yearned for, he filled me to overflowing. He took my fears, shame and guilt and replaced them with his truth. I have had allot of healing and restoration, God has restored my relationship with my mother and before she died she had accepted Jesus, he restored my girls innoncance and they are his and are working for his kingdom. He has restored my second marriage. He has given me life instead of the sentance of death. He has replaced joy instead of sorrow. He given me all that I need and desire. He has equiped me to fight for others. There is so much more that Jesus has done for me. When I was weak he made me strong, when I felt at times I could not go on he has taken my hand and walked beside me. I am learning as the years go on who I am, I am a child of the living God a princess. What a honour.
Battle Maiden
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