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Our Lord Jesus Christ loves you.
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Author Topic: [Insert Sarcasm Here]  (Read 4125 times)
Shammu
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B(asic) I(nstructions) B(efore) L(eaving) E(arth)


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« on: September 13, 2005, 04:21:38 PM »

THE LAW IS THE LAW


So if the US government determines that it is against the law for the words "under God" to be on our money,

Then, so be it.

And if that same government decides that the "Ten Commandments" are not to be used in or on a government installation, then, so be it.

And since they already have prohibited any prayer in the schools, on which they deem their authority, then so be it.

I say, "so be it," because I would like to be a law abiding US citizen.

I say, "so be it," because I would like to think that smarter people than I are in positions to make good decisions.

I would like to think that those people have the American Publics' best interests at heart.

BUT, YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE I'D LIKE?

Since we can't pray to God, can't Trust in God and cannot Post His Commandments in Government buildings, I don't believe the Government and it's employees should participate in the Easter and Christmas celebrations which honor the God that our government is eliminating from many facets of American life.

I'd like my mail delivered on Christmas, Good Friday, Thanksgiving    &  Easter.

After all, it's just another day. I'd like the US Supreme Court to be in session on Christmas, Good Friday, Thanksgiving & Easter as well as Sundays.

After all, it's just another day.

I'd like the Senate and the House of Representatives to not have to worry about getting home for the "Christmas Break."
After all ~ it's just another day.

I'm thinking that a lot of my taxpayer dollars could be saved, if all government offices & services would work on Christmas, Good Friday &  Easter.

It shouldn't cost any overtime since those would be just like any other day of the week to a government that is trying to be "politically correct".

In fact....

I think that our government should work on Sundays (initially set aside for worshiping God...) because, after all, our government says that it should be just another day....

What do you all think?Huh

If this idea gets to enough people, maybe our elected officials will stop giving in to the minority opinions and begin, once again, to represent the ' majority' of ALL of the American people.

SO BE IT...........

Please Dear Lord, give us the help needed to keep you in our country!
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nChrist
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« Reply #1 on: September 14, 2005, 06:12:23 AM »

 Grin   Angry   Cool   Huh

Maybe the following dictionary will help the Federal and Supreme Courts. It makes as much sense as some of their rulings.
---------------------------------

Fractured Dictionary

Arbitrator - \ar'-bi-tray-ter\:
A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonald's.

Avoidable - \uh-voy'-duh-buhl\:
What a bullfighter tries to do.

Baloney - \buh-lo'-nee\:
Where some hemlines fall.

Bernadette - \burn'-a-det\:
The act of torching a mortgage.

Burglarize - \bur'-gler-ize\:
What a crook sees with.

Control - \kon-trol'\:
A short, ugly inmate.

Counterfeiters - \kown-ter-fit-ers\:
Workers who put together kitchen cabinets.

Eclipse - \i-klips'\:
what an English barber does for a living.

Eyedropper - \i'-drop-ur\:
a clumsy ophthalmologist.

Heroes - \hee'-rhos\:
what a guy in a boat does.

Left Bank - \left' bangk'\:
what the robber did when his bag was full of loot.

Misty - \mis'-tee\:
How some golfers create divots.

Paradox - \par'-uh-doks\:
two physicians.

Parasites - \par'-uh-sites\:
what you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower.

Pharmacist - \farm'-uh-sist\:
a helper on the farm.

Polarize - \po'-lur-ize\:
what penguins see with.

Primate - \pri'-mat\:
removing your spouse from in front of the TV.

Relief - \ree-leef'\:
what trees do in the spring.

Rubberneck - \rub'-er-nek\:
what you do to relax your wife.

Seamstress - \seem'-stres\:
describes 250 pounds in a size six.

Selfish - \sel'-fish\:
what the owner of a seafood store does.

Subdued - \sub-dood'\:
like, a guy, like, works on one of those, like, submarines, man.

Sudafed - \sood'-a-fed\:
bringing litigation against a government.
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Shammu
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« Reply #2 on: September 14, 2005, 09:05:13 AM »

Well I had a mess to clean up, after your Fractured Dictionary brother! My was water is all over, the computer desk! Cheesy

I got to admit though, yes I laughed hard. Thanks for the funnies today, brother Tom. Cheesy

Your friend and brother in Christ.
Bob

Psalm 2:4 He that sitteth in the heavens shall laugh: the LORD shall have them in derision.
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Soldier4Christ
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« Reply #3 on: September 14, 2005, 02:02:06 PM »

LOL ....  I think that the Federal and Supreme Courts have already been using that dictionary right along with the ACLU.

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Joh 9:4  I must work the works of him that sent me, while it is day: the night cometh, when no man can work.
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« Reply #4 on: September 15, 2005, 12:50:06 AM »

i agree PR i just look for the Lord To Come Any Day now Real Soon i Can See IT Comeing so be ready to go
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Reba
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« Reply #5 on: September 15, 2005, 12:55:42 AM »

Sarcasm being asked for at CU....


Say it isn't so......


Judgenot will find this thread soon
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Shammu
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« Reply #6 on: September 15, 2005, 01:48:01 AM »

Sarcasm being asked for at CU....


Say it isn't so......


Judgenot will find this thread soon
I know, thats who I am waiting for...... Grin

Resting in the hands, of Jesus.
Bob

Genesis 24:27 And he said, Blessed be the LORD God of my master Abraham, who hath not left destitute my master of his mercy and his truth: I being in the way, the LORD led me to the house of my master's brethren.
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« Reply #7 on: September 15, 2005, 01:03:45 PM »

 Grin Cheesy Grin There you go. What's good for the goose is good for the gander.  I agree with you 100%.
Those are the same people who are double minded. We need to always make sure that our voice as Christians is heard that is why it is important for all Christians to vote. After all God is the Creator, not the created. And just in case some people forgot, HE alone is King of Kings. He will remove them and establish HIS kingdom right here on the earth He created.
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PS 91:2 I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in Him will I trust
nChrist
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« Reply #8 on: September 15, 2005, 09:36:25 PM »

Brothers and Sisters,

I was just reading this thread again and thinking that 50 years ago I would never have dreamed how far this country would erode over such a short period of time.

I can't remember where I heard or read this term, but I think that it explains nearly everything. It's an abbreviation, and I plan to start using it. Maybe this will help JudgeNot and others find this thread.

"LLL"

Loopy Liberal Left

Grin  Cheesy

Love In Christ,
Tom

Job 8:20-22 NASB  "Lo, God will not reject a man of integrity, Nor will He support the evildoers. "He will yet fill your mouth with laughter And your lips with shouting. "Those who hate you will be clothed with shame, And the tent of the wicked will be no longer."
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JudgeNot
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« Reply #9 on: September 16, 2005, 09:23:25 PM »

Sarcasm being asked for at CU....


Say it isn't so......


Judgenot will find this thread soon

Who???  ME???!!!!!  Wink
Sarcasm, like the ability to spread cold butter on warm bread, is not simply an art; its a gift.  

Now did that sound sarcastic?   Grin
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Shammu
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« Reply #10 on: September 17, 2005, 12:22:29 AM »

Sarcasm being asked for at CU....


Say it isn't so......


Judgenot will find this thread soon

Who???  ME???!!!!!  Wink
Sarcasm, like the ability to spread cold butter on warm bread, is not simply an art; its a gift.  

Now did that sound sarcastic?   Grin

You have refined it, to a high art form! Cheesy
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Reba
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« Reply #11 on: September 17, 2005, 09:24:10 PM »

Wow Judge are you always this correct?
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JudgeNot
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« Reply #12 on: September 17, 2005, 11:52:36 PM »

From the reigning queen of sarcasm:
Wow Judge are you always this correct?
Cheesy  Cheesy  Cheesy  Cheesy
You see?  How can anyone compete with that?   Cheesy  Cheesy
I've learned a lot from you, Reba.  Your mentorship has been instrumental.
 Grin

Uhhummmm....
Back on subject...
DW - I understand what your point is.  

You know, if government insists on completely removing Christianity from it's ranks, then that also means removal Christian employees and their traditions.

That's okay - they can refill the ranks with illegal immigrants.  Roll Eyes  
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« Reply #13 on: September 19, 2005, 04:37:55 PM »

So if the government wants to get rid of Christians, and the folks south of the border want to come up here weather they are allowed or not, I have a solution!
 We can move south of the border, have our own little Christian country in the warm weather and they can take our places up here!  Grin
I'm sure any one who dreads to see winter come will agree with me quickly!
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Jason
Romans 5:6  For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly.
JudgeNot
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« Reply #14 on: September 30, 2005, 07:49:01 PM »

So if the government wants to get rid of Christians, and the folks south of the border want to come up here weather they are allowed or not, I have a solution!
 We can move south of the border, have our own little Christian country in the warm weather and they can take our places up here!  Grin
I'm sure any one who dreads to see winter come will agree with me quickly!

Hey!  You know you're right!  Patriotism is an ideal.  Does it matter where it's practiced?

But...But...But... can I come back to the purple mountains' majesty during the summer??  I guess those amber waves of grain in the fall would be missed, also...

Let me think about this a minute....


Okay - minutes up...
I say we build a wall and protect what we have.  I know a few good engineers.  Hey - we could enclose a natural gas pipeline in the foundation and make the oil companies pay for it!  Grin   The Oil companies would even pay for security to protect their investment.  

Who says old fashioned capitolism won't work?  Oh - yea - liberals...
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Covering your tracks is futile; God knows where you're going and where you've been.
JPD
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