My Son

[Shammu]

My prayers will be with you sister.

[nChrist]

Thanks Pastor Roger!  We are going to need all the prayers we can get.  I will let you guys know how everything goes.  Also tomorrow, I am calling the christian school in the town where I work.  My son is wanting to go there.  I am going to set up an appointment to go meet with them and let my son tour the school.  Pray that goes well also.  That appointment will probably not be until Wed or Thurs.  Tomorrow is my BIG DAY.  I feel at peace about things, but still nervous (if that makes sense).  You will never know how much all of your prayers and words of encouragement have meant to me. 

Hello Sister Tami,

My prayers will be with you and your family. My computer has been up and down the last several days, so I'm glad to be able to read this. Many things are sounding good and better. I have no doubt that GOD will be at the center of any progress, so we need to continue prayer and give HIM Thanks! ALL GLORY TO GOD!

Love In Christ,
Tom

Favorite Bible Quotes 387 - Psalms 121:2 My help cometh from the LORD,
which made heaven and earth.

[sctami]

Well, my first meeting is over.  IT WAS ROUGH!!!  Mitchell pretty much told me and his dad that we had kind of abandoned him to be by himself when he was little, and he always felt that he was a lone.  That we never tried to talk or communicate with him.  And then when we found out he had thought about suicide and that he is gay, then we wanted to communicate but he does not want us to communicate with him.  Of course, none of this is true, but I guess to him it is.  We didn't argue with him we just listened.  He said that he is a christian but still likes guys, that he is still gay.  I held back the tears as I sat there and listened. 

I did note that when he was talking about his friend that he had a crush on, he said that it wasn't the physical attraction, but the emotional attraction. 

He told me yesterday that he wanted me to set up an appointment to go check out the private christian school in the town where I work.  So, I did.  I set it up for 1:00 on Wednesday.  I even asked him 5 minutes before we went into therapy if he still wanted to do that, and he said yes.  Then after the meeting, while eating supper, he told me that he would go look at the school, then tell them he had changed his mind and wanted to stay at the school he now attends.  I asked him why, and he said that it would not be right to go to a christian school knowing he is gay.  Again, I held back my tears well. 

Of course, after getting home and thinking a little more, he has now decided once again he wants to check out the school.  He informed me of this as I started to write this e-mail. 

So, I guess what I am wondering is "is this progress"?  Is this all sounding like it is heading in the right direction?  And, by the way, I did cry all the way home, which was about a 30 minute drive.  I called my brother and talked with him, and he encouraged me some.  It is so difficult on him because I know that his daughter is causing him problems.  Please continue to pray that this is the path that God has chosen and that things will work together for his good.  I am a littled depressed and down right now but am looking for things to get better.  Hopefully, Mitch will like the school tomorrow. 

Mitch has another meeting with the therapist by himself next Tuesday, and then the next week we have another family session.  Please continue to pray that I can leave this with god and not try to take it back.  It looks like I have already made a mess out of it to start with, I need him to do a lot of fixing.  Thanks guys!!!!

[Soldier4Christ]

It looks like I have already made a mess out of it to start with

Sister, don't take this blame on your own shoulders. It won't do you or your son any good to look at it in that angle. Pointing fingers and laying blame is not a solution but rather a road block that will only get in the way of the solution.

A person that knows they are wrong will lay the blame anywhere they can in an attempt to make it seem right. It is the old saying "It is your fault that I am this way." A lack of taking responsibility for ones own actions. The whole entire truth of the matter is that homosexuality is a choice and it is one that apparently your son has made. Your son is responsible for the choices he has made. Yes, you as the parent can guide him, teach him in the right ways but in the end it is his choice and therefore his responsibility.

Your son seems to know this but is not willing to admit it. At least not yet. This is most likely the reason for the indecisiveness in going to the Christian school. There does seem to be some progress in this situation but it is a long way from reaching a conclusion. At least he is being a little more open in talking about it even though he may not be making sense to you or for that matter to himself either.

Continue in the strength of the Lord, sister. Do not backtrack.

[sctami]

I am trying hard to keep up the faith Pastor Roger.  I feel like that song that Karen Peck sings, "Will you hold me while I cry".  I know I have to keep pressing forward and that God will move when it is time and when he does it will bring honor and glory to him.  Keep me in your prayers that I can fight this battle know God is my armor, my shield, my sword and my victory.

[Soldier4Christ]

Sister, without a doubt you and your son will continue in my prayers.

[nChrist]

Hello Sister Tami,

First, I want to say that I agree 100% with what Pastor Roger told you.

The back and forth - and conscience issues - tells me that you have tried to properly raise your son. The absence of conscience and knowing right from wrong is an indication that the parents failed miserably. The fact that you're having these conversations and trying so hard is also commendable. As parents, we can only do so much, and then we have to pray. There comes a point in every person's life when they have to take responsibility for their own actions. That point isn't far off for your son.

I spent most of my life in law enforcement, and I knew many young people who could offer some reasonable excuses, but they were nothing like your son. I'm talking about children who spent most of their young lives with little or NO love, abuse, neglect, molestation, torture, and you name it from people who were supposed to be their parents. It was obvious that they didn't have anyone who cared about them, and their so-called parents actually created monsters for society to deal with. You are obviously the opposite of a "don't care" parent. All of the facts and circumstances indicate that your son had parents who loved him, cared for him, and tried to raise him properly. The trials and heartbreak of what you're going through now are proof that you do care and always have. Otherwise - you would either encourage his wrong choices or simply call him names and kick him out the door without any effort to help him. In this case, I firmly believe it's wrong for him to play the "blame game" with you. In fact, he appears to be the opposite of those who could offer excuses and try to blame their parents.

Stick with it and HANG TOUGH. You are already praying and trying everything. The only thing I know you can do is to continue with patience and firmness - and keep praying. We will also keep praying.

Love in Christ,
Tom

Favorite Bible Quotes 51 - 1 John 2:15-17 Love not the world, neither
the things that are in the world. If any man love the world, the love
of the Father is not in him. 16 For all that is in the world, the lust
of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not
of the Father, but is of the world. 17 And the world passeth away, and
the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever.

[HisDaughter]

I also agree with what has already been said and I will continue to pray for you and your family also.  Sometimes we want God to just hurry up and answer our prayers and not go through the process, which often involves pain, to get there.  God has a purpose in all of this and maybe it is the process and the time that it will take, for your son to find the truth.  I'm praying that he will eventually go to the Christian school because that would be such a wonderful environment for him right now.
Please keep us posted and informed of how we can pray for you.

In Christ,
Grammyluv

[sctami]

Mitchell is starting to his new school tomorrow.  He decided that he wanted to give the private christian school a try.  He seems excited.  The principal asked why he wanted to change, and Mitch told him because the environment at the school he was in now is not good for the direction in which he wants his life to go.  That he wanted to be in a school that had a better environment for him to be in.  I think that was a pretty good answer myself.  It seems the prayers may be working.  He will have a bible class each day and chapel on Wednesday mornings.  He thinks this is "cool".  I will let you know how things go.  Thanks for the prayers!!!  My day today was much, much better than yesterday. 

[Soldier4Christ]

I don't mean to sound negative on this but there is still a long way to go. Even though this is a positive step in the right direction he may still have his ups and downs. Yes, prayer will continue for you both.

[Shammu]

My prayers will also continue for y'all.

[nChrist]

Mitchell is starting to his new school tomorrow.  He decided that he wanted to give the private christian school a try.  He seems excited.  The principal asked why he wanted to change, and Mitch told him because the environment at the school he was in now is not good for the direction in which he wants his life to go.  That he wanted to be in a school that had a better environment for him to be in.  I think that was a pretty good answer myself.  It seems the prayers may be working.  He will have a bible class each day and chapel on Wednesday mornings.  He thinks this is "cool".  I will let you know how things go.  Thanks for the prayers!!!  My day today was much, much better than yesterday. 

AMEN!

I think that the answer your son gave to the Christian school was WONDERFUL! Christian parents around the country are either going in the same direction or homeschooling for the very same reason your son mentioned. I say pat him on the back, give him an extra hug, and tell him that you're proud of him. From everything you've said, you let him make this decision, and you would have let him stay where he is. He might just have made one of the most important decisions of his life. I know that he had help, BUT HE MADE THIS DECISION! YES - we will keep praying for him and your family. I agree completely again with Pastor Roger that it's not time to let your guard down. Regardless of circumstances, this is a rough time for young people in this age group. They need all of the love, encouragement, and prayer we can give them. Even the best, most skilled, and hardest trying parents in the world need help from GOD in raising their children. The prayer and requested HELP FROM GOD should be for the GOOD TIMES also - times where there are no problems. It should go without saying that we also need to be THANKING GOD every day! ALL GOOD THINGS COME FROM HIM!

Love In Christ,
Tom

Favorite Bible Quotes 284 - Luke 2:7-14 And she brought forth her
firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a
manger; because there was no room for them in the inn. 8 And there
were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch
over their flock by night. 9 And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon
them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were
sore afraid. 10 And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I
bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. 11
For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is
Christ the Lord. 12 And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find
the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. 13 And
suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host
praising God, and saying, 14 Glory to God in the highest, and on earth
peace, good will toward men.

[sctami]

My son seemed to have enjoyed his first day of school.  He said that all the other kids were friendly and accepting.  It is an extremely small class.  Only 18, including him.  He said that he wants to go there again tomorrow and that I can turn his books in at his old school.  God is really moving in this situation, and I give him all the praise and glory.  I know that Mitchell has a long ways to go, that this is just the beginning, but I am so thankful for this beginning!!!  I am going to keep fighting and rebuking the devil until my son is completely healed!   

[Soldier4Christ]

Amen! It does sound good indeed.

[Shammu]

AMEN sister AMEN!!

My prayers will also continue for y'all.