Clothing Our Children

[nChrist]

Hello Pastor Roger,

Brother, I thought that I might give some of our readers and users some ideas about where I hoped this discussion would eventually go:

1 - What kind of an example should we set before our children in what we do and what we say? Are our children really going to be greatly impacted with what we do and say in front of them?

2 - What more specific things should we be interested in teaching our children and when?

3 - Generally, what's more important - being buddies with our children or being parents to our children?

4 - What do we allow into our homes, and what do we kick out of our homes?

5 - Do we all have a need to evaluate public education and think very seriously about other alternatives?

6 - Does the list of worthy questions get larger and larger as our children grow older?

7 - Is real love by a parent letting a child have and do whatever they want to?

8 - Is a lot of money required for Christians to obtain various kinds of wholesome materials for their children?

I would like to partially answer the last question right now. There are tons of free materials for Christians to use. Christians Unite is an excellent example, both on the forum and in other areas of Christians Unite. All kinds of materials for various age groups are completely free for the taking.

Please take a look at ChristiansUnite KIDS at:

http://kids.christiansunite.com/

This is just a small example of what's freely available on just Christians Unite. I'm also happy to note that we have sermons and devotions for children of various ages on the forum for Christian parents to take and use. The sources and types of FREE Christian materials are almost without limit, so having a lot of money isn't an issue. Making the time to use the materials with your children is the issue, and this should be a priority for all Christian parents. It does involve some work on our part, but the work is fun and satisfying. In fact, is is part of our obligation to our children.

Love In Christ,
Tom

Romans 11:33 NASB  Oh, the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments and unfathomable His ways!

[Soldier4Christ]

Amen Brother Tom, these are all very important things and are what we as parents need to consider very seriously.

[airIam2worship]

Amen.

Another thing parents ought to do is pray over their children everyday, and as their children leave for school they should speak words of wisdom and blessings over their children.

In my country it is a custom for children to ask their parents for their blessing as they leave the house and before going to bed. All of us grew up saying "Bendicion" which is Spanish for bless me. To this day, even as an adult when I speak to my aunts and uncles who are in their 80's and 90's I always say "Bendicion" when ever I see them or talk to them on the phone. The response is always may God bless you and be with you, may His face shine upon you. That is something that even my grandchildren have learned since they were babies and it will more than likely continue on through further generations.
We were taught not to be afraid to ask our parents and our elders for a blessing.

[nChrist]

Hello Sister Maria,

I also pray for my children and grandchildren every day, but we have also taught them to pray. I was just thinking back to many of the prayers we got to listen to when they were very little. The blunt honesty of small children makes some of the prayers pretty funny, so you just have to bite your lip and laugh later. 

We also prayed with them and gave them examples of how to pray and what to pray for. This involved teaching them how to pray for others and why. Most of their prayers are quite genuine, and we know that GOD loves to listen to the little ones. We do also.

Love In Christ,
Tom

Psalms 36:7 NASB  How precious is Your lovingkindness, O God! And the children of men take refuge in the shadow of Your wings.

[airIam2worship]

Amen Brother Tom some of the prayers children say are quite humoruos, yet they are so innocent and filled with love and honesty that we know for sure God hears our children pray. Yes indeed it is very important for children to know that they have a God who care for them and about them, and loves them beyond measure. If our children are taught to pray from a very young age they will do so all their lives. Even toddlers follow the examples shown to them by their parents and do as they see their siblings do. It is one of the most precious gifts a parent can give their children. Teach them to pray.

[Faithin1]

I haven't  been online for the past few days (severe allergic reaction to penicillin) so I am just now rejoining this discussion.  My son's biological father has never really been a dad to him.  Praise God, there have been other Christian male role models for him, such as my dad,  2 of my 3 brothers, and other relatives and friends who show him love and spend time with him.  Being a single mother of a teenager is not easy, and I  constantly seek guidance from God.

In addition to raising him in a Christian environment, I feel it is imperative to raise him to respect women.  I firmly believe respect for women begins with a boy's respect for his mother.  If he does not respect his mother, he will not respect other women when he becomes a man.  I have never given my son a reason to disrespect me, and I have told him many times that he does not have to like me, but he will respect me.   Although I often joke around with him, I have made it very clear that I am not one of his buddies, I am his mother. 

[Soldier4Christ]

Amen,sister. Parents and their children can have fun together and still have the parents being the authority figure. We can teach them how to be fair, polite and much more while we are having fun. When to have fun and when to be serious and to be responsible for ones actions at all times.

[nChrist]

Hello Faithin1,

I was just thinking back to when I was growing up. Respect for Mother was a high priority in our home. Disrespect, especially to Mother, always resulted in the board of education being applied to the seat of learning.   

I taught my children the same way, and my grandchildren are being taught the same way. We have a breakdown of our homes and society when there is disrespect for the first authority figures in the home. If there is disrespect at home, how can we expect our children to treat teachers, other authority figures, and the law of the land. I must mention here that SOME parents don't deserve or earn respect from their children, and the parents themselves actually program their children to lose in many different ways. I can think of many examples, but I'll just mention the parents being doped up, daddy being a thief and dope dealer, and momma being a prostitute. What can we really expect from children growing up in an environment like this? Overcoming a beginning like this is a huge challenge for the children, and many never do. The only thing worthy of respect that they might learn could involve guns, knives, fists, and fear. They really don't understand the term "respect", and how could we expect them to?

In the hard cases, we can begin to understand the value of churches, Christians who serve in youth activities, the Boy Scouts, Christian Youth Programs from the YMCA and the Salvation Army, sports programs with Godly coaches, and many other worthy activities that Christians are known to volunteer for in large numbers. Drugs and many other of the devil's devices have robbed millions of children of decent parents. It's a true statement that our own neighborhoods and cities are NOW an important mission field for Christians. The devil has been very busy in our so-called civilized societies, and he is devouring homes on every block in our part of the world. There is a huge amount of work for every Christian to do.

May we all yield to GOD'S Will and do the work he has planned for all of us. May GOD give all of us the strength and guidance to do HIS Will until JESUS comes to take us home.

Love In Christ,
Tom

Ephesians 6:1-4 NASB  Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. HONOR YOUR FATHER AND MOTHER (which is the first commandment with a promise), SO THAT IT MAY BE WELL WITH YOU, AND THAT YOU MAY LIVE LONG ON THE EARTH. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

[airIam2worship]

Hello Faithin1, I pray you are feeling better now, I am sorry to hear your were ill. Please don't take penicillin again.

You know my youngest daughter is allergic to 7 different types of antibiotics, penicillin is one of them. Because of this the doctor had to give her an allergy test before prescribing any antibiotics.

This is another way that parent clothe their children, by the time my daughter was 8 years old she could name each of the antibiotics she is allergic to, that is because I taught them early in life important facts they needed to know about themselves and the family. They all knew what medicines they could or could not take, they also knew their blood type as well as each others blood type and my blood type. Little things like these were not neglected when my children and I gathered around the dinner table, because I was a single parent and most of the time my 2 older ones had to baby sit the 2 younger ones they were prepared on how to deal with almost anything. I taught them how to do CPR on infants and on adults, I also taught them how to do the Heimlich maneuver on each other and on themselves. I was going to school for LPN and I worked at a nursing home as a licensed NA so I was able to teach them these things.

It is important for parents to teach their children many thing without alarming them, but teach them and teach them well, this way they learn early in life that they are important not just to me but to their maker, Jesus Christ. I also taught my children not to fear, I taught them that Jesus was always by their side and all they had to do was call on Him. One night I heard my son calling loudly "Jesus, Jesus", I woke up and ran to his room he told me he was having a bad dream, and he remembered I told him to call on Jesus whenever he was afraid. It is a blessing to be able to teach your children when they are still young and willing to listen to their parents trusting in them fully.

When children are not taught while they are still young, they get to their adolescent years where they think that they and their friends know everything.

[kerrylou1]

I believe in being honest with our children. I was told, having told my children if I did anything wrong that they were to tell me I had done wrong that I was making a rod for my back and that my children would be disrespectful. What I said to them was, "If its wrong for you, it's wrong for me."

I have not found it to be arduous, neither have my children been disrespectful. In fact, I have the respect of both my sons and Paul, my oldest, when going through the lowest moment of his life [I had taught him not to drink alcohol and avoid cavorting in worldly pleasures but, others: "leaders in the Church" had instructed him otherwise so that he disobeyed me] would contend with others, "My dad is right!"

I think the greater risk is when we have one rule for them and another for ourselves. This encourages rebellion and disrespect so I always encourage, "Take the same risk I did, its worth it."

Love,

Kerry.

[nChrist]

Hello Brother Kerry,

Sadly, our children are surrounded with conflict every day. It's a confusing world for them, and we can either reduce that confusion or add to it. You made some excellent points. Obvious hypocrisy on our part is a bad mistake. We should simply own our errors and tell our children that we were wrong. I know that all loving parents make mistakes, regardless of how hard we try. We must be willing to admit our mistakes before we can expect them to. Regarding my church teaching my children to drink and carouse, that would only happen once and we would be attending a different church.

Love In Christ,
Tom

2 Corinthians 9:8 NASB  And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed;

[kerrylou1]

Hello, Tom,

I hope you don't mind, I prefer to avoid titles altogether although I think that 'brother' is best since it puts us on equal footing.

Thank you for the encouragement. It was not the church I attend that made this error but, as we live in a small country town we were trying to work together with the other churches in reaching the youth. It was their leaders who caused the confusion and is one reason I don't get involved in ecumenical outreaches any more. They asked for my youngest son to go to their kids club and I said, "No."

It is sad that we have to divide ourselves from those who are unruly but it is absolutely necessary for our children.

Love,

Kerry.

[nChrist]

Hello, Tom,

I hope you don't mind, I prefer to avoid titles altogether although I think that 'brother' is best since it puts us on equal footing.

Thank you for the encouragement. It was not the church I attend that made this error but, as we live in a small country town we were trying to work together with the other churches in reaching the youth. It was their leaders who caused the confusion and is one reason I don't get involved in ecumenical outreaches any more. They asked for my youngest son to go to their kids club and I said, "No."

It is sad that we have to divide ourselves from those who are unruly but it is absolutely necessary for our children.

Love,

Kerry.

Hello Kerry,

Whatever you prefer in terms of "Brother" is fine with me. I was a police officer for 25 years and called every name in the book. Just for the record, I don't use the terms "Brother or Sister" as titles, rather as positional relationships in JESUS CHRIST, but I understand completely. Please forgive me if I slip and forget from time to time.

Reference the actions of the church organization you spoke of, they would be out of business where I live. Most would consider where I live to be medium sized. We are tied directly to an Army Base and have an overall population of probably 140 to 150 thousand people. It does go up and down with various training cycles and deployments from the base. Our area would be considered to be pretty conservative, but we do have bars and clubs in our city. I would also say that most of our churches are pretty old fashioned and fundamental. I'm not hinting that we don't have our share of problems.

Love In Christ,
Tom

Psalms 51:10 NASB  Create in me a clean heart, O God, And renew a steadfast spirit within me.

[airIam2worship]

Brothers and Sisters, it is sometimes hard for us to call each other Brothers or Sisters especially since we have never even seen each other, but we know in our hearts that our Father in Heaven loves each one of us with  the deepest love any one of us could ever imagine. I know that since I have been a member of CU I have grown to love those Brothers and Sisters in Christ that I have constant fellowship on the forum with even if I have never seen them. That is truly God's Love upon us, as Jesus said we shall be known by the love we have for each other.

My own carnal brothers and sister call each other my brother or my sister, I think this really shows so much love.

A very good way to teach our children is to love our own siblings, and to put them before ourselves, that is one thing I thank my mom and dad for, now that they are both in heaven, I thank God that my parents taught us very young to  have respect for one another and to continue to stay together and care for each other.

They too were very close to my aunts and uncles, whom we now look up to as our guides, I know that I can go to my aunts and uncles at anytime and ask for their advice and I know that they love me they have been a sort of substitute for my parents. My aunts and uncles are very old they are in the 80's and 90's, the love I have for them and they have for me has spilled over to my husband and my step daughters, whom they don't even consider step  to my aunts and uncle they are my children and they have adopted them as their own nieces, this is another way our children learn, they see the love and respect that we have for our elders and they follow in our footsteps. Children learn by example.

What a wonderful way to teach them. 
By our actions!!

[ravenloche]

This week I got a rapid reminder about proper clothing in the natural. I have
lived in Arkansas for the last 25 years, but my home state is Ohio.  It has been
my sad duty this week to return to Ohio and settle the estate of my father.

The weather conditions in Ohio are far different than those of Arkansas, and I
must consistantly be the "over protective " father with my 10 yr. old son.

On the bright side of this story, as soon as we arrived here in Ohio, one of the
first questions out of my son's mouth was: "where will we go to church?"
To me, both as a father, and as a minister, those were encouraging words.
There was a time in the not too distant past when I had to insist that his
siblings attend services.  My comment to them was to tell their friends they
had a drug problem!!!! Every time the doors were opened I drug them in!

I know that I have not always been the perfect father, or the perfect example
to my children, but proverbs has been proven true in my family at least.
"train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart
from it" Of the 9 children I have raised, only 1 is not saved.
I am waiting on him to return to the truth of the word . The bible promises that
our families will be saved. I know the word is true, thus my son will step into the
truth of that word.

I digress(surprize, surprize). Seeing that we meet the physical needs of our
children, and if possible, the children in our lives, is vital. Seeing that these
same children learn to cloth themselves in the righteousness of God is not only
vital...it is everything.  They are our future church--what are we teaching them.

yours in Jesus

ravenloche