Laughter - Good Medicine

[airIam2worship]

Nope, you are in 18th still, sister.

check the stat and you see I am coming up on 16th if you take out the other in active number 3 not PR you know which one then instead of going to17th place I will be going into 16th place. in a few more posts

[airIam2worship]

which I might do today

[airIam2worship]

just  to get them over with and get them outta the way

[airIam2worship]

now its only 23

[Soldier4Christ]

check the stat and you see I am coming up on 16th if you take out the other in active number 3 not PR you know which one then instead of going to17th place I will be going into 16th place. in a few more posts

With the other third place holder not there you are in the 19th place headed for 18th.

Click on "Members List" at the bottom of the main forum page then click on "posts" at the top of the posts column you will get the current standing without that other person in third.

[Soldier4Christ]

which I might do today

Just 21 more posts.   

[Shammu]

Just 21 more posts.   

Go Pastor Go!

[nChrist]

Clinton's Indian Name:

American Indians have nicknamed Bill Clinton as "Walking Eagle" because he is so full of bull he can't fly.      

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Politically Correct:

Serial Killer:
Person with difficult-to-meet needs.

Lazy:
Motivationally deficient.

Fat:
Horizontally challenged.

Fail:
Achieve a deficiency.

Dishonest:
Ethically disoriented.

Bald:
Follicularly challenged.

Clumsy:
Uniquely coordinated.

Body Odor:
Nondiscretionary fragrance.   

Alive:
Temporarily metabolically abled.

Worst:
Least best.

Wrong:
Differently logical.

Ugly:
Cosmetically different.

Unemployed:
Involuntarily leisured.   

Short:
Vertically challenged.

Dead:
Living impaired.

Vagrant:
Nonspecifically destinationed individual.   

Spendthrift:
Negative saver.

Drunk:
Chemically inconvenienced.   

Pregnant:
Parasitically oppressed.

Ignorant:
Knowledge-based non-possessor.

[nChrist]

Do You Have Any Polish Sausage?

Man walks into a store and asks the clerk "Do you have any polish sausage."

The clerk replies "Are you Polish?"

The man says "Yes, but why do you ask. If I asked for Italian Sausage would you ask if I was Italian, or if I asked for German Sausage would you ask if I was German, or if I asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican.

The clerk simply answered "No."

The man asked him why he asked then he asked if he was Polish.

The clerk replied "Because this is a hardware store."

[nChrist]

Dead Politicians:

A busload of politicians were driving down a country road when, all of a
sudden, the bus ran off the road and crashed into a tree in an old farmer's
field.

The old farmer, after seeing what happened, went over to investigate. He
then proceeded to dig a hole and bury the politicians. A few days later,
the local sheriff came out, saw the crashed bus and asked the old farmer
where all the politicians had gone.

The old farmer said he had buried them.

The sheriff asked the old farmer, "Were they ALL dead?"

The old farmer replied, "Well, some of them said they weren't, but you know
how them politicians lie."

[nChrist]

Thirsty?:

An Arab diplomat visiting the US for the first time was being wined and dined by the State Department. The Grand Emir was unused to the salt in American foods (french fries, cheeses, salami, anchovies etc.) and was constantly sending his man-servant Abdul to fetch him a glass of water.


Time and again, Abdul would scamper off and return with a glass of water, but then came the time when he returned empty-handed. "Abdul, you son of an ugly camel, where is my water??" demanded the Grand Emir.

"A thousand pardons, O Illustrious One," stammered the wretched Abdul, "white man sit on well."              

[nChrist]

Heros?:

One day Bill Clinton was out jogging -- and accidentally fell from a bridge into a very cold river.

Three boys, playing along the river, saw the accident. Without a second thought, they jumped in the water and dragged the wet president out of the river.

After cleaning up he said, "Boys, you saved the President of the United States today. You deserve a reward. You name it, I'll give it to you."

The first boy said, "Please, I'd like a ticket to Disneyland!"

"I'll personally hand it to you," said Mr. Clinton.

"I'd like a pair of Nike Air Turbos," the second boy said.

"I'll buy them myself and give them to you," said the grateful defender of the Western Hemisphere.

"And I'd like a wheelchair with a stereo in it," said the third boy.

"I'll personally ... wait a second, son, you're not handicapped!"

"No -- but I will be when my father finds out whom I saved from drowning."   

[nChrist]

How to Choose a Political Party:

During a neighborhood party, Joe got into an argument with his neighbor, about presidential politics. Finally, the neighbor asked me why Joe was such a dedicated Republican.

Joe told him that his father and grandfather were both Republicans and he was carrying on the family tradition.

"That's it?" said the exasperated neighbor. "What if your father and grandfather had been horse thieves?"

"Well..." Joe replied, "I suppose then I'd be a Democrat like you."

[nChrist]

NYPD FBI and CIA:

The NYPD, The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at apprehending criminals. The President decides to give them a test.He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.

The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist.

The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming.

The NYPD goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling: "Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!"                 

[nChrist]

Iraqi Bingo:

Q. How do you play Iraqi bingo?

A. B-52...F-16...B-2

=======================================


Term Limits?:

Q: Do you think the terms of congressmen should be limited?

A: No, I think they should stay in jail as long as anyone else should.