Kicked out of church!

[sincereheart]

I'm confused....

You were asked to not even come to that particular church building?  

I can understand if they were talking about you not becoming members of that church building/denomination....

But I don't understand them not wanting you to come and hear The Word.  

Yes we were asked not to come through the doors. We never asked or tried to become members of the church. So, to answer your question, we are not permitted in the building at all, and that includes our 8 year old daughter too!

Reminds me of the saying:
God, save us from your children!  

I'm sorry for the treatment! I don't understand why a pastor can't share God's Word and then let God handle it from there!

But I would suggest reading the Bible at home and talking to God! He may just lead you to others who also hunger for more and before long you can have a home Bible study!

I'm most especially sorry that an 8 yr old is being led AWAY from Christ!  

Now what was that bit in the Bible about Jesus and the woman at the well?

[His_child]

allamedo-
I'm totally confused on two issues.

1- If you know fornication is wrong, why do you continue to live together?
(Is the fact that your girlfriend's ex won't give her a divorce a good reason to sin?)

2- If you two have only been together for 3 years, how do you have an 8 year old daughter together?

1 - We have no other options at this time, no one has offered to help, and we cannot afford it.

2 - She is from a previous marriage, her father died, she considers me her dad and I consider her my daughter.

Thank you for clearing up about the 8 year old.

As far as the first question- are you saying that it's ok to sin in certain situations?

You do have another option. You don't have to fornicate. You're using the fact that she can't get a divorce as a means to justify living in sin.
I'm sorry that she can't get a divorce right now. However, you're both teaching that 8 year old that it's ok to sin.

I don't condone what the pastor said.
However, you are just a guilty for leading this little girl astray as the church is. Perhaps moreso since you are a parental figure to her.
She needs you to set a role model for her by doing what is right in God's eyes.
At this time, you can't marry and that is unfortunate. Also, at this time you can't live together and that is unfortunate too. However, if you start following God's Word, you'll set a good role model and your life will be a blessing to you and others. It won't be easy. The right thing seldom is easy.

[sincereheart]

When my husband and I first came to the Lord, we were living together. We had a whole bunch of reasons why we should live together without marrying.
Those reasons seemed justified to us.
Our pastor pulled no punches about our lifestyle, but he did not ask us to leave the church. We were not allowed to be in leadership with any of the ministries, but we were encouraged to participate in all ministries in the church that applied to us.

We were not allowed to go to a marriage seminar because we weren't married and weren't planning on getting married, but we were allowed to partake in Bible studies, care groups, etc.

Don't you think this pastor chose well?

And how is asking them to go away helping?

[His_child]

When my husband and I first came to the Lord, we were living together. We had a whole bunch of reasons why we should live together without marrying.
Those reasons seemed justified to us.
Our pastor pulled no punches about our lifestyle, but he did not ask us to leave the church. We were not allowed to be in leadership with any of the ministries, but we were encouraged to participate in all ministries in the church that applied to us.

We were not allowed to go to a marriage seminar because we weren't married and weren't planning on getting married, but we were allowed to partake in Bible studies, care groups, etc.

Don't you think this pastor chose well?

And how is asking them to go away helping?

Yes, I think my pastor handled our situation correctly.
I don't recall saying that allamedo's pastor handled things correctly.

Someone pointed out that the pastor also kicked the 8 year old little girl out of the church which keeps her from hearing the Gospel.
I have two problems with this:
1- She should be hearing the Gospel at church and at home, therefore not going to church should not keep her from hearing the Gospel.
2- People who are committed Christians should not be intentionally sinning. This little girl is also being hurt because her parents are teaching her that this sin is ok.

Why are Christians on a Christian board having a hard time calling fornication a sin?!

I'm not saying this because I want to upset allamedo. I've prayed about this situation since I saw the first post. I'm saying this because I truly do care.
allamedo and his girlfriend have justified their sin.
Sin is sin no matter how much you try to justify it.

[sincereheart]

Yes, I think my pastor handled our situation correctly.

And I agree..... Yet the pastor mentioned here handled in a way that I don't agree with:

... and said that we were a black eye to God every time we walked through the door of the church. After this he told us that we were no longer welcome at the church.

Someone pointed out that the pastor also kicked the 8 year old little girl out of the church which keeps her from hearing the Gospel.
I have two problems with this:
1- She should be hearing the Gospel at church and at home, therefore not going to church should not keep her from hearing the Gospel.
2- People who are committed Christians should not be intentionally sinning. This little girl is also being hurt because her parents are teaching her that this sin is ok.

But she's now NOT allowed to hear God's Word in a place that is supposed to be God's House. At eight, what message will this send her?

Whoever welcomes in my name one of these children, welcomes me, and whoever welcomes me, welcomes not only me but also the one who sent me.
- Mark 9:37
God Speaks Bible
Some people think of God only as the Red Sea-parting, raising-the-dead power behind the universe. That certainly is a big part of who He is. But God also revealed Himself in the form of a helpless baby born in a Bethlehem manger two thousand years ago. The next time you hold a baby in your arms, imagine the Ruler of the universe crying with hunger or shivering from the cold.
God could have come to earth as a full-grown man or an invincible super-human hero. But He deliberately chose to begin His life as a child. He knows, from real experience, what it's like to be a kid. God the Son probably endured His share of skinned knees, nightmares, and bullies. No wonder the Bible is full of passages about how much God loves children. He knows how hard it is to be one.

One of the best ways to please the heavenly Father is to show love to His kids... regardless of their color, size, and shape. Physically or mentally challenged. Rich or poor. It's difficult for kids to believe that God cares for them if the adults they encounter don't reflect His heavenly love.

Next time you see one of God's little ones, be sure and pass along His love. He's depending on you.
Copyright (C) GodSpeaks, (TM) Inc. 2004
All Rights Reserved

Why are Christians on a Christian board having a hard time calling fornication a sin?!

Where did anyone say that what they're doing is right?   Even allamedo said: "We realize that the way we are living is not acceptable to God..."

 What people tried to do was answer the questions asked:

I don't think that what was done to us was right, nor Biblical. What do you think?

[Willowbirch]

I think Tibby is a  Catholic.  That whole idea of "throwing people out to Satan"   is something establishments of men misinterpret so that they can manipulate and control people.

Yes, men like Paul.

Tibby, re-read your scripture and this time start from the very beginning of the chapter way before the scripture so you can gather the correct flow of what is being said.  And then you will see that someone interpreted it just the way they wanted it to give power to man-made establishments.

I don't think you even know what verses I'm referring to, do you? You may dislike authority, but it is a bible principle. Pastor, Priests, Deacons, Elders. There is no such thing as a “man-made” establishment in True Christianity. God places our leaders in Authority over us. Hebrews is rather clear about that.

Amen, Tibby.

allamedo and his girlfriend have justified their sin.
Sin is sin no matter how much you try to justify it. Amen again...

I'm speaking from a human perspective here (dangerous...) Would someone PLEASE stop saying that all Christians are sinners, and if you kick one sinner out you might as well get rid of them all???   A Christian can easily fall into sin; but he or she is NOT a sinner unless they are allowing that sin to thrive and become their master. Christ has ransomed us from the power of sin, and therefore we are free to obey God instead of the world and our own lusts. This doesn't mean we are perfect yet, and it doesn't mean we can boast in ourselves. But we are no longer "sinners", even if I don't agree with the decision of allamedo's pastor.  

[allamedo]

I just wanted to update everyone on our situation. Some of the other Christians in the community that we have Bible study with contacted the Pastor at the Assemblies of God church in Spray, a community about 25 miles away. He came to our Bible study last night and talked with all of us about our Pastor. He basically said that there is nothing we could do if he will not listen to us, his recommendation was to let go and let God, sounds a little cliche. But he's right, God will deal with the Pastor in God's time not ours.

After the discussion with the group, he came over to our house to talk personally with us. He said, I don't have to repeat the Scriptures to you, because you already know them. He explained that he felt that the Pastor hadn't handled it the best way that he could have, but the Scriptures were clear on the situation. In his opinion, he said that he should have been helping us solve the situation and guiding us instead of condemning us.

Well, to make a long story short, the Pastor from Spray has made a committment to us to help us get this divorce done, and to make sure that we get to the church every Sunday, by either a ride from someone nearby or he'll send the church van to pick us up. We also made a committment to him and God, which he told us was foundational, in order for God to bless this undertaking. We made a committment to sleep in separate rooms, and to remain sexually pure until the day that he marries us, we made this committment to him, to God, and have to make it publicly to the congregation. He said that if we do this, he will counsel us on marriage, help us in any way that he can, and get the whole congregation behind us in prayer.

I realize that this is not going to be easy, but I know that it's what God wants us to do.

Thank you all for your responses and advice, I hope that God blesses you all in abundance,

Al & Debie

[Tibby]

I think Tibby is a  Catholic.  That whole idea of "throwing people out to Satan"   is something establishments of men misinterpret so that they can manipulate and control people.

Yes, men like Paul.

Tibby, re-read your scripture and this time start from the very beginning of the chapter way before the scripture so you can gather the correct flow of what is being said.  And then you will see that someone interpreted it just the way they wanted it to give power to man-made establishments.

I don't think you even know what verses I'm referring to, do you? You may dislike authority, but it is a bible principle. Pastor, Priests, Deacons, Elders. There is no such thing as a “man-made” establishment in True Christianity. God places our leaders in Authority over us. Hebrews is rather clear about that.

Amen, Tibby.

allamedo and his girlfriend have justified their sin.
Sin is sin no matter how much you try to justify it. Amen again...

I'm speaking from a human perspective here (dangerous...) Would someone PLEASE stop saying that all Christians are sinners, and if you kick one sinner out you might as well get rid of them all???   A Christian can easily fall into sin; but he or she is NOT a sinner unless they are allowing that sin to thrive and become their master. Christ has ransomed us from the power of sin, and therefore we are free to obey God instead of the world and our own lusts. This doesn't mean we are perfect yet, and it doesn't mean we can boast in ourselves. But we are no longer "sinners", even if I don't agree with the decision of allamedo's pastor.  

Amen, right back at ya, willow.

[His_child]

I just wanted to update everyone on our situation. Some of the other Christians in the community that we have Bible study with contacted the Pastor at the Assemblies of God church in Spray, a community about 25 miles away. He came to our Bible study last night and talked with all of us about our Pastor. He basically said that there is nothing we could do if he will not listen to us, his recommendation was to let go and let God, sounds a little cliche. But he's right, God will deal with the Pastor in God's time not ours.

After the discussion with the group, he came over to our house to talk personally with us. He said, I don't have to repeat the Scriptures to you, because you already know them. He explained that he felt that the Pastor hadn't handled it the best way that he could have, but the Scriptures were clear on the situation. In his opinion, he said that he should have been helping us solve the situation and guiding us instead of condemning us.

Well, to make a long story short, the Pastor from Spray has made a committment to us to help us get this divorce done, and to make sure that we get to the church every Sunday, by either a ride from someone nearby or he'll send the church van to pick us up. We also made a committment to him and God, which he told us was foundational, in order for God to bless this undertaking. We made a committment to sleep in separate rooms, and to remain sexually pure until the day that he marries us, we made this committment to him, to God, and have to make it publicly to the congregation. He said that if we do this, he will counsel us on marriage, help us in any way that he can, and get the whole congregation behind us in prayer.

I realize that this is not going to be easy, but I know that it's what God wants us to do.

Thank you all for your responses and advice, I hope that God blesses you all in abundance,

Al & Debie

Praise God!

You're right, it won't be easy! However, it will be well worth it.

As I said, my husband and I were in this same situation when we were first saved. If you would like some ideas or suggestions, please let me know.

[sincereheart]

I just wanted to update everyone on our situation. Some of the other Christians in the community that we have Bible study with contacted the Pastor at the Assemblies of God church in Spray, a community about 25 miles away. He came to our Bible study last night and talked with all of us about our Pastor. He basically said that there is nothing we could do if he will not listen to us, his recommendation was to let go and let God, sounds a little cliche. But he's right, God will deal with the Pastor in God's time not ours.

After the discussion with the group, he came over to our house to talk personally with us. He said, I don't have to repeat the Scriptures to you, because you already know them. He explained that he felt that the Pastor hadn't handled it the best way that he could have, but the Scriptures were clear on the situation. In his opinion, he said that he should have been helping us solve the situation and guiding us instead of condemning us.

Well, to make a long story short, the Pastor from Spray has made a committment to us to help us get this divorce done, and to make sure that we get to the church every Sunday, by either a ride from someone nearby or he'll send the church van to pick us up. We also made a committment to him and God, which he told us was foundational, in order for God to bless this undertaking. We made a committment to sleep in separate rooms, and to remain sexually pure until the day that he marries us, we made this committment to him, to God, and have to make it publicly to the congregation. He said that if we do this, he will counsel us on marriage, help us in any way that he can, and get the whole congregation behind us in prayer.

I realize that this is not going to be easy, but I know that it's what God wants us to do.

Thank you all for your responses and advice, I hope that God blesses you all in abundance,

Al & Debie

I like that pastor!  

Wonderful!

[Whitehorse]

Allamedo, I'm wondering what you're looking for in a church.

[allamedo]

Allamedo, I'm wondering what you're looking for in a church.

A church that has love in it, and I've found it. The Pastor did not condone the way we're living, as a matter of fact he agreed with the Scriptures quoted to us by or former Pastor. But the difference between them was love! This Pastor gave us an alternative, support, and most of all showed us the love of Christ. He did not call us names or insult us, but in a loving and caring way showed us why the way we lived was wrong, and then made a personal committment to us to help us correct it if we would make a committment to God before him and the congregation. Say whatever you want, but I feel like I'm loved here! Yes we are still living together, but no longer in sin! We are sleeping in separate rooms and not having sexual relations. What more do you want, for one of us to live under a bridge? We are accountable to God, and God only! I believe that He opened this door, and we entered through it and are doing the right thing before Him, and ultimately that's all that counts!
Your brother in Christ,
Al