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Our Lord Jesus Christ loves you.
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Author Topic: WOMANHOOD  (Read 6942 times)
Forrest
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« on: June 11, 2004, 01:03:57 PM »

                        WOMANHOOD


       Women over 50 don't have babies because they would put them down and forget

       where they left them.

         (Isn't that the TRUTH!!! )

 

       One of life's mysteries is how a 2 pound  box of candy can make a woman gain 5 lbs.

   

       The nice part about living in a small town is that when you don't know what

       you're doing, someone else does.

 

       The older you get, the tougher it is to lose

       weight because by then, your body and your fat

       are really good friends.

         

       Amazing! You hang something in your closet

       for awhile and it shrinks two sizes!

 

      Skinny people irritate me! Especially when

       they say things like, "You know, sometimes I just

       forget to eat." Now I've forgotten my address,

       my mother's maiden name, and my keys. But I've

       never forgotten to eat. You have to be

       a special kind of stupid to forget to eat.

 

 

       The trouble with some women is that they get all

       excited about nothing and then they marry him.

 


       I read this article that said the typical

     symptoms of stress are: eating too much, impulse buying,

      and driving too fast. Are they kidding?

      That is my idea of a perfect day.


 

       I know what Victoria's Secret is. The secret is that

       nobody older than 30 can fit into their stuff.
 
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          Forrest              
ROM 12:5 So we, [being] many, are one body in Christ, and every one members one of another.
sincereheart
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« Reply #1 on: June 13, 2004, 06:40:21 AM »

LOL!  Grin
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Shammu
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« Reply #2 on: June 15, 2004, 02:13:51 AM »

Thats rich, Forrest.

Runs as fast as I can outta this thread
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Shylynne
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« Reply #3 on: October 27, 2004, 07:34:39 PM »

Another one of life's mysteries is... how we can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto our legs, rip the hair out by the roots, and still be afraid of a spider.  Lips Sealed

  Grin
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There is no force on earth as powerful as one human soul set ablaze with the Spirit of God -  Shylynne
Brother Love
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« Reply #4 on: October 28, 2004, 05:25:16 AM »

                      WOMANHOOD


      Women over 50 don't have babies because they would put them down and forget where they left them.

        (Isn't that the TRUTH!!! )

 

      One of life's mysteries is how a 2 pound  box of candy can make a woman gain 5 lbs.

   

       The nice part about living in a small town is that when you don't know what you're doing, someone else does.

 

       The older you get, the tougher it is to lose

       weight because by then, your body and your fat

       are really good friends.

         

       Amazing! You hang something in your closet

       for awhile and it shrinks two sizes!

 

      Skinny people irritate me! Especially when

       they say things like, "You know, sometimes I just

       forget to eat." Now I've forgotten my address,

       my mother's maiden name, and my keys. But I've

       never forgotten to eat. You have to be

       a special kind of stupid to forget to eat.

 

 

       The trouble with some women is that they get all

       excited about nothing and then they marry him.

 


       I read this article that said the typical

     symptoms of stress are: eating too much, impulse buying,

      and driving too fast. Are they kidding?

      That is my idea of a perfect day.
[/size]  

      I know what Victoria's Secret is. The secret is that nobody older than 30 can fit into their stuff.
 




LOVE IT!!!!!




« Last Edit: October 28, 2004, 05:29:02 AM by Brother Love » Logged


THINGS THAT DIFFER By C.R. Stam
Read it on line for "FREE"

http://www.geocities.com/protestantscot/ttd/ttd_chap1.html

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sincereheart
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« Reply #5 on: October 28, 2004, 07:48:34 AM »

Quote
You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat.
ROFL!  Grin
 Lips Sealed


Quote
You hang something in your closet for awhile and it shrinks two sizes!
And all this time I thought it was the dryer!  Wink
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Brother Love
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« Reply #6 on: October 29, 2004, 05:53:21 AM »

Quote
You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat.
ROFL!  Grin
 Lips Sealed


Quote
You hang something in your closet for awhile and it shrinks two sizes!
And all this time I thought it was the dryer!  Wink


 Grin


I know what Victoria's Secret is. The secret is that nobody older than 30 can fit into their stuff.  Grin








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THINGS THAT DIFFER By C.R. Stam
Read it on line for "FREE"

http://www.geocities.com/protestantscot/ttd/ttd_chap1.html

<Smiley))><
Willowbirch
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« Reply #7 on: October 30, 2004, 12:01:13 PM »

Another one of life's mysteries is... how we can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto our legs, rip the hair out by the roots, and still be afraid of a spider.  Lips Sealed

  Grin
Grin My aunt is terrified of crickets...and she is over six feet tall.
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sincereheart
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"and with His stripes we are healed." Isaiah 53:5


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« Reply #8 on: October 31, 2004, 07:20:20 AM »

Quote
You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat.
ROFL!  Grin
 Lips Sealed


Quote
You hang something in your closet for awhile and it shrinks two sizes!
And all this time I thought it was the dryer!  Wink


 Grin


I know what Victoria's Secret is. The secret is that nobody older than 30 can fit into their stuff.  Grin

The other part of the secret is that no one with children can afford the stuff!  Wink
« Last Edit: October 31, 2004, 07:24:32 AM by sincereheart » Logged



Shylynne
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« Reply #9 on: October 31, 2004, 04:34:55 PM »

Another one of life's mysteries is... how we can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto our legs, rip the hair out by the roots, and still be afraid of a spider.  Lips Sealed

  Grin
Grin My aunt is terrified of crickets...and she is over six feet tall.

I`m terrified of anything that resembles a bug, and i`m no shrimp  Lips Sealed
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“Christianity isn't all that complicated … it's Jesus.”   — Joni Eareckson Tada

There is no force on earth as powerful as one human soul set ablaze with the Spirit of God -  Shylynne
Brother Love
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« Reply #10 on: November 01, 2004, 04:29:06 AM »

Quote
You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat.
ROFL!  Grin
 Lips Sealed


Quote
You hang something in your closet for awhile and it shrinks two sizes!
And all this time I thought it was the dryer!  Wink


 Grin


I know what Victoria's Secret is. The secret is that nobody older than 30 can fit into their stuff.  Grin

The other part of the secret is that no one with children can afford the stuff!  Wink


 Grin sure  Grin


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THINGS THAT DIFFER By C.R. Stam
Read it on line for "FREE"

http://www.geocities.com/protestantscot/ttd/ttd_chap1.html

<Smiley))><
Kalthzar
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« Reply #11 on: November 16, 2004, 03:46:35 PM »

Just thought you ladies should be aware of this quote

Nancy Astor (1879-1964)
American Born British Conservative politician
"I married Beneath me, all woman do"
'in Dictionary of National Biography 1961-1970' (1981)



Does this make me a gender traitor?   Cheesy
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"Men speak of killing time when time slowly killing them"
"We make war that we may live in peace"
"Practical politics consists in ignoring the facts"
"Everyone's quick to blame the Alien"
"Multiplication vexes me, Division is as bad, The ru
sincereheart
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"and with His stripes we are healed." Isaiah 53:5


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« Reply #12 on: November 17, 2004, 09:04:06 AM »

Just thought you ladies should be aware of this quote

Nancy Astor (1879-1964)
American Born British Conservative politician
"I married Beneath me, all woman do"
'in Dictionary of National Biography 1961-1970' (1981)



Does this make me a gender traitor?   Cheesy

Probably! But it was amusing!  Grin
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Kalthzar
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« Reply #13 on: November 17, 2004, 01:41:16 PM »

*hides*

*wonders when he can come back*

*sits in a corner contemplating*
*decides woman are better conversationilists anyway*

*whistle*

 Wink
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"Men speak of killing time when time slowly killing them"
"We make war that we may live in peace"
"Practical politics consists in ignoring the facts"
"Everyone's quick to blame the Alien"
"Multiplication vexes me, Division is as bad, The ru
Melody
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« Reply #14 on: December 15, 2004, 02:07:36 PM »

                       WOMANHOOD


       Women over 50 don't have babies because they would put them down and forget

       where they left them.

But at least my glasses, car keys and shoes would have company!
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