Hypothetical Questions

[Tibby]

A little “Hypothetical” for us to chat about:

Adam, PJ, and Jarrissa are all part of a large clump of friends. Adam and PJ have known each other for 4 years about. They have been in the clump for that long, too. They argue a lot, and disagree, and annoy each other, like all male friends do. Well, PJ meet Jarrissa in September, and Jarrissa joined the clump. They have been don’t the on again, off again, ever since. 2 weeks ago, PJ official “dismissed” Jerrissa. They are both still in the clump. All they did was fight in that relationship, but it was their relationship, and they loved it while it lasted. And we think PJ still like Jarrissa,

Well, Adam and Jarrissa have started the Average American mate ritual. In other words, they are at the stage where it is clear to everyone but the 2 of them that they like each other.

The problems: Is it wrong for Adam to date his friends ex? Is it wrong for Jarrissa to date her ex’s friend? Does PJ have a right to be angery? Should he give them his blessing? Should they date or not? And if so, should they keep the relationship from PJ for a while?

And what about the rest of the clump? What should they do? Stay away, or get involved? What about the people who brought Jarrissa into the clump, should they get involved?

We (as in the clump) all run a big Youth rally every month as you know, do you think their personal problems would get in the way of ministry?

Well, guys, what would you do? What do you guys think?

[JudgeNot]

Okay, Tibby.  You're in love and want us to point you in the right direction, right?  Are you PJ or Adam?  

Yes - if you don't keep your focus on Christ, it can get in the way of your ministry.  If everyone involved knows that Christ is the focus when you walk in the door, and everyone can keep that focus, well...  But that takes a LOT of strength.

("Clump"?  We used to call them cliques!)  

[Whitehorse]

JN said it well.

[OnGodspath]

 
I do think it is wrong to date ex's friends.  Too convenient. too hurtful, especially if everybody hangs out together.

I guess it depends on the individuals though.  How serious was the ex relationship.  How does everyone involved feel about it.  I don't think anyone's feelings should ever be disregarded.  

[JudgeNot]

OnGodspath;
Welcome to C-Unite!

Your post gives us something to think about...

[Whitehorse]

This I can say-when two friends like the same person, that will be the end of the friendship. Even if the girl doesn't want to date the first guy anymore, if he still likes her, then he isn't happy about that breakup. Emotionally, he's still with her in his heart. If the second guy steps in, that friendship is over. If the group gets involved, that's the end of the group because everyone will take sides and every bit of hidden group politics, whether it relates to that situation or not, will come into play and it will explode like an atomic bomb. Seen it happen.

[Tibby]

Okay, Tibby.  You're in love and want us to point you in the right direction, right?  Are you PJ or Adam?  

I'd rather not say just yet ;-) You will find out when you get invited to a Wedding or an excuction. Either way, it auta be a lot of fun!

("Clump"?  We used to call them cliques!)  

I clique implies we have things in common, such as musical taste, or clothing style. We are far from a uniform group.


Thanks for the advice guys. Situations like this never turn out good. I guess praying is the best way. Jarrissa has flat out said PJ broke her heart, and for Adam to move in, while it might help Jarrissa, will hurt Adam. And PJ is going to hurt if they go out, too, it hurts even when YOU break up with them for some reason.

You know, I assumed now that we have aged to the point where "teen" is no longer a suffix of our age, this kind of silliness would stop. Turns out it just followed us into adulthood

[Sapphire W34P0N]

Haha. "Clump." Hehe.

[Tibby]

Ah, Sapph ,I see you finally to a respectable band on your sig, eh? Great job, bro. It is a step in the right direction (the direction toward folk).  

[OnGodspath]

OnGodspath;
Welcome to C-Unite!

Your post gives us something to think about...

Thanks for the welcome.  I love to make people think.  Like to think I can help sometimes too.

[Willowbirch]

Thanks for the welcome.  I love to make people think.  Like to think I can help sometimes too.

Good to have you here, OnGodsPath!

Tibby - ouch! What a dilema! I'm glad I'm an outcast!  

[Tibby]

Thanks for the welcome.  I love to make people think.  Like to think I can help sometimes too.

Good to have you here, OnGodsPath!

Tibby - ouch! What a dilema! I'm glad I'm an outcast!  

Who likes the dissect people...

You could be in our clump if you want Like a long distance member.  

[Willowbirch]

You could be in our clump if you want Like a long distance member.  

What rates do you charge?

[Tibby]

2 cents a minute if you promises not to dissect any of us (that is an extra monthly change).

For an extra 5 dollors a month, you get unlimited blog visits to stay down on the lasts news in the clump.

We also have extra charges for contacting our girl and boy friends who are outside of the clump, untill they are admitted in as full fledged members (after the 3rd date).

Just sign on the dotted line, and we can get started  


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[sincereheart]

A little “Hypothetical” for us to chat about:

Adam, PJ, and Jarrissa are all part of a large clump of friends. Adam and PJ have known each other for 4 years about. They have been in the clump for that long, too. They argue a lot, and disagree, and annoy each other, like all male friends do. Well, PJ meet Jarrissa in September, and Jarrissa joined the clump. They have been don’t the on again, off again, ever since. 2 weeks ago, PJ official “dismissed” Jerrissa. They are both still in the clump. All they did was fight in that relationship, but it was their relationship, and they loved it while it lasted. And we think PJ still like Jarrissa,

Well, Adam and Jarrissa have started the Average American mate ritual. In other words, they are at the stage where it is clear to everyone but the 2 of them that they like each other.

The problems: Is it wrong for Adam to date his friends ex? Is it wrong for Jarrissa to date her ex’s friend? Does PJ have a right to be angery? Should he give them his blessing? Should they date or not? And if so, should they keep the relationship from PJ for a while?

And what about the rest of the clump? What should they do? Stay away, or get involved? What about the people who brought Jarrissa into the clump, should they get involved?

We (as in the clump) all run a big Youth rally every month as you know, do you think their personal problems would get in the way of ministry?

Well, guys, what would you do? What do you guys think?

Adam needs to find another fish in another sea....