Thank you all for your kind advices. I feel more encouraged than before to hear from you guys that my mistakes do not mean that I can have nobody else but him. I am now working hard to make myself believe that. Though it is still work in progress, but I ask for your help in prayers to help me go through this. I talked to him. I told him that I wish to go back to the way our relationship first started (I told him there would be no sex when we first started going out). He agreed, reluctantly. Although I know I should trust in God, there is still a part of me who doesnt want to let go of the wheel and let God take control of my soul mate. Again, thank you all for being here.

I totally feel you My bf is crazy about final fantasy xi. I always feel second to ffxi although he keeps insisting that it is not true. I am not sure if this would make you feel better, but 4 hrs a wk would be something I am grateful for because right now, my bf plays 4 hrs a day!  He is working 8 hrs a day 7 days a wk. I am lucky if we get to see each other 3 times a week for 1-2 hrs each time.

I personally don't understand why my bf would spend so much time earning fake money and fake items in a fantasy world either. If anyone can find a solution to your problem, she/he's surely answering my prayer too

Hi everyone,
   I was browsing the net and came across this wonderful site this morning. A lot of the topics you all discussed here really hit close to home. I couldn't miss out becoming part of this forum. I am sorry for greeting you all with my problem. Yet I feel compelled to ask for help.
   I have been going to church for years. I am ashamed to admit that I have been really backsliding pretty much eversince I was baptized. Especially for the past 2 years, eversince I started dating a non-Christian guy. I am not blaming him for what'd happened to me. I only have myself to blame.
   It started out really casually. We were classmates. We did homework and study together. We grew to like each other more than just friends. A close friend from church warned me not to play with the fire. Yet, I assured him that I wouldn't fall in love with him, and I would only test the water because I never dated anyone before.  
  To make the long story short, I'd drifted farther from God. I've even given myself to him, needless to say, to much of my own disappointment, grief, regret, and shame. I hide none of those feelings from him. He knew how I felt like a failure, hypocrite, and not worthy of His mercy.
  When I recently told my friend (who knows the sin we committed) about him marrying me in the future, he told me not to marry because I felt that he owed me. He told me not to look at the marriage as a way of reimbursement of what I've lost.
  My boyfriend is not a bad guy. He is sweet and lovable. I do enjoy being with him. However, I want us to marry based on love, not because I felt like no other guy would marry me because I've been tainted, a feeling that keeps on haunting me.
  I hope my experience would be a lesson to learn from, instead of a stumbling block for any of you. I thank you for your advices and supports in prayers.