I haven't spoke to my wife in years...
I didn't want to interrupt her!

Man I was poor growing up..
(how poor were you)
I was so poor growing up that the rainbows were in black and white!

~Rodeny Dangerfeild

"Drugs are bad M'kay, Drugs are bad."
"Mr. Mackey"

I don't have kids of my own yet (lord willing) someday I hope to have a quiver full. I have been a "Big brother" though (Big brothers of america) kinda like a mentoring program for boys with out dads.. and was asked to give the speach to my "little" He was about 11 years old at the time, and I know this wasn't his first experence.. I think his mom drew concern from over hearing a phone conversation he was having with one of his friends.. and tried to talk with him and it turned out to be a disaster so she asked me... and well it took acouple of weeks of planning. I found out what he was interested in that could be used as an Ice breaker.. his point of interest lay in Anime (Japaneese animation) Started with poke mon then yugi-o then it went into several other types... I'm not completely familiar with all the various shows, but I do know that the "Evil one" uses this innocent intrest in this unique format to introduce mild pornorghaphic Ideas, and intrest. So we started a everyday conversation about his weekly shows and then moved to a couple what do you think questions about a couple of shows in his viewing routine (I sat down and watched them and took notes) most of them on cable have strong sexual unspoken tension.. or what the child may be able to Identify as a crush or a strong attraction with caracters not much older than themselves. I think this is the appeal.. to be able to explore these new emotions and feelings without shame or embarssment... So long story short (Too late right) This is an excellent oppertunity to take back our kids from unrestrained "Explortation"...So...

1) find common ground and do some homework cause they can easily tell when your making some half hearted attempt to connect.
2)Try to stay in control don't be nervous of fearful it inspires, even more uneasyness and embarassment for the child.
3) Not only tell them about the act the god has ordaind between a man and his wife but maybe even start with fanatsy and the things that his friends maybe engauged in.. because it is far more likly that he will have to fight those battles long before engauging into any relationships.
4) once he's this far in your conversation make sure you address the things the world will be telling him and the differences between God's will and Our will Condoms safe sex/ abstanance and long suffering
5)this was the hardest for me but make sure that he know that it's normal to "engauge himself" as he gets older "if he hasn't already" from mt own personal experences I was contplating suicide or cutting off "my hand" and casting it into the fire for it's better to go thru life mamed that it is to lose one's soul.... from the time I was 10 or 11 because a well meaning teacher caught me in the boys bathroom at a "christian school" and that's what he told me... I was an adult  before it was ever discussed seriously again, and I found out that I wasn't the only one that has ever done such a thing.. can you even continplate carring around the magnintude of guilt that was my burden for nearly 10 years?? for what? Even when I was able to show super human self control I would have a speical dream and would be guilt all over again... It was a devestating cycle that thru no fault of my own I couldn't control... make sure you son know what's ahead of him.


No pressure lol, just Pray for strenth and do your homework and know what your going to say. you will do fine! It's not as bad as you think it is..

I'll be praying for you both
~Chili

Generaly speaking women hold a great power over men when it comes to suductive or form fitting clothing. Something that our culture has down played, because of harsh hearts. those of us trying to protect our hearts from the callouses fromed thru objectifing women, are very easily drawn into lustful thoughts and ungodly feelings... Christian or not we are chemically driven and activated physically. and after that our christianity or "morals" keeps us from acting wrongly...
Not to steal from one of the comic cultures major Icons, but with great power comes an awsome responciablity. God has given most women, the power to activate a primal responce in men and with that it is your responcablity to harness and control that aspect of your bodies untill your in a situation where you and your husband can benifit.. Other wise your using a god given gift in a manor not intended by the creator.

example: the goverment doesn't allow the open market sale of plutomium right? why? because in the wrong hands the effects are potentially distructive on a very large scale..
With great power, comes an awsome responcability.

That same physophy should be applied to the female form at all times because look at the destruction and devestation unbridaled female sexuality has had on the family. I know that's not a popular thing to point out, and this will be even less. But look at the places in our socity where female modestity is an endangered or forgotten.. there is another creature living in those neighborhoods that can be considered endangered and/or forgotten, and that's the family as god intended it.. It's just not there anymore, the fathers are gone, and it has alot to do with the menu the men are provided with... why stick out a tough relationship when there's so much to choose from.. Get someone knocked up? Just move on "cause dis new girl ain't go no baby" That was an answer I got from a 16 year old who just recently broke up with his considerably younger girlfriend that our program was sponcering...
 I'm not saying that men are blameless here, cause we arn't, but neither are the women.. You gals HAVE TO DO YOUR PART!! and WE HAVE TO DO OURS!!
Godbless and remember to pray for those of us that still have a hormonal drive that seems to lead us down the wrong path, every chance it gets!

so to answer your questions:
1) Yes
2) yes
3) I'm ok with what she wears.
4) Yes

I know the feeling of sadness you speak of, how do we make change happen in our churches, in ourselves?

Salvation from what???
Hell?
Ourselves?
If from hell do you really want to goto heaven?
Why?
Or are you just stirring the pot?

I had some run with masions recently and let me tell you there was nothing free about it! It cost 3600.00 to repair NOT replace a section of wall I accedently knock down with my truck.. And you can totaly tell they did a shotty patch job.. Does anyone know who we report to?

As you can no doubt see their is alot of scripture on the matter, and I'm sure that if your thread stays up long enough someone will cut'n paste the other half of the bible up there.

just from personal experience...

 You can cry now cause you lost "him/Her" Or Cry for the rest of the marriage, cause you got him/her.. And depending on Where you are in your relationship With God, this will bring you closer to God or Drive you Away..
The real scarry thing about it is, you won't know where you'll be standing with God till your there... Some of us are lucky and we Suffer and endure with god, and the rest Suffer with out..