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Entertainment => Laughter (Good Medicine) => Topic started by: John 3:16 on February 20, 2006, 11:12:21 AM



Title: Christian One-liners
Post by: John 3:16 on February 20, 2006, 11:12:21 AM
Christian One-liners
>>
>>"Don't let your worries get the
>>best of you.  Remember, Moses
>>started out as a basket case"
>>
>>Some people are kind, polite,
>>and sweet-spirited - until you
>>try to sit in their pews.
>>
>>Some minds are like concrete,
>>thoroughly mixed up and
>>permanently set.
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>Many folks want to serve God,
>>but only as advisers
>>
>>It is easier to preach ten
>>sermons than it is to live one.
>>
>>The good Lord didn't create
>>anything without a purpose,
>>but mosquitoes and
>>sand gnats come close.
>>
>>When you get to your wit's
>>end, you'll find God lives there.
>>
>>People are funny, they want
>>the front of the bus, the middle
>>of the road, and the back of
>>the church.
>>
>>Opportunity may knock once,
>>but temptation bangs on your
>>front door forever.
>>
>>Quit griping about your church;
>>if it was perfect, you couldn't belong.
>>
>>
>>If the church wants a better
>>pastor, it only needs to pray
>>for the one it has.
>>
>>God Himself does not propose
>>to judge a man until he is dead.
>>So why should you?
>>
>>Peace starts with a smile.
>>
>>I don't know why some people
>>change churches; what
>>difference does it make which
>>one you stay home from?
>>
>>A lot of church members
>>who are singing "Standing
>>on the Promises" are just
>>sitting on the premises.
>>
>>We were called to be witnesses,
>>not lawyers or judges
>>
>>Be ye fishers of men.
>>You catch them - He'll clean them.
>>
>>Coincidence is when God
>>chooses to remain anonymous.
>>
>>Don't put a question mark
>>where God put a period.
>>
>>Don't wait for 6 strong men
>>to take you to church.
>>
>>Forbidden fruits create many jams
>>
>>God doesn't call the qualified,
>>He qualifies the called
>>
>>God grades on the cross,
>>not the curve.
>>
>>God loves everyone, but
>>probably prefers "fruits of the spirit"
>>over "religious nuts!"
>>
>>God promises a safe landing,
>>not a calm passage.
>>
>>He who angers you, controls you!
>>
>>If God is your Co-pilot - swap seats!
>>
>>Prayer: Don't give God
>>instructions -- just report for duty!
>>
>>The task ahead of us is never
>>as great as the Power behind us.
>>
>>The Will of God will never
>>take you to where the Grace
>>of God will not protect you
>>
>>We don't change the message,
>>the message changes us.
>>
>>You can tell how big a person
>>is by what it takes to
>>discourage him.
>>
>>The best mathematical
>>equation I have ever seen:
>>1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.