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I find witnessing to my family very hard and I need advice from you who have witnessed before.

Problem is that I know them and it's not that I couldn't tell them to repent but it's that I don't know what is the right abroach.

First there is mom who says that she believe in God but she is not living her life for Jesus. She did not even know Jesus is the word of God that became flesh and is part of God and therefore God Him self.
She just says that she believes in God and that she has prayed sometimes but when I asked from her what is the reason for our lifes she said that we should live good live taking care of our self and so since we are the image of God...
So I really don't know what to say to her. I think she belives Jesus is the only way to heaven but I am not entirely sure.

Then there is my half sister, she doesn't believe in God because it's something you can't touch - she says. And I really hate the way she lives, sinful life, cussing saying God's name in vain (is vain the right word?). And I have told her to stop and she is like "oh, sorry" every time.
I was thinking of asking about her purpose in life but I don't know if that leads to anywhere. What do you think..? How do you make atheist think about meaning of life?

Next there is my little brother, he is 16. I remember how kind he was  when he was just a kid, always thinking about the others but now he's completely different, he has become selfish and mean due to the influence of bad people like me. Because before Christ called me I was selfish and mean towards him. Now the situation is exact opposite.
But don't get me wrong he is not all bad, he is just leaning more towards evil in he's actions and behaviour.
Well maybe that was pointless to say but it was from top of my heart.
He does not believe in God and he has not probably thought about it much since when ever I try to talk about God to him he is not interested to hear. But he does listen he just doesn't seem to have much interest in God.
I have told him how Jesus told us to love one another and that is most important and that Jesus has died for our sin because we are all sinners and he seems to accept this but I don't know if gave it a thought or not. He did try to read Bible once.
I know I should talk to him more but I don't have words to say... My own faith is quite new too and God simply opened my eyes too see so I don't know how to witness to some one who's eyes are not open.

Lastly there is my dad who doesn't know should he believe or not. I actually must thank Jesus at this point because I think I have made progress with him because I have talked about my faith to him and he used to say that he doesn't believe but now I think he does.
But how do I tell him that he must repent and believe in Jesus so that he may be saved? I don't know, I quess I don't have the courage for that because I am afraid that God's word does not have room in him and I feel sorry for him because he is just kid lost in the lust of life.


So I can talk to these people but I am not sure how much to say at a time. When is time to change from milk to wine?
I don't know because I went straight to wine my self, at least it feels that way.

Thanks for reading, I hope my post was clear enough, english is not my native language.

Jari, don't feel so alone, it is very hard to witness to your own family members. Even Jesus was rejecte by His own. You are doing the right thing in loving them and talking to them, but you must also pray for the Lord of the Harvest to send the perfect laborer across their paths. Sometimes family memers will listen to a friend, a fellow employee, or even a stranger before they will listen to someone in their own household. It is satan's way he blinds the minds and eyes of the lost and especially our loved ones so they won't listen. Don't doubt yourself, every little seed (word) you plant into family members will grow. But just talking to them is not all, more important than talking to them is praying for them, and also show them how much you have changed. Keep in mind that now thwy will be watching everything you say and do and how you react to things. God has wonderful things in store for all who love Him. I am going to keep you and all your family in my prayers.  :)

Thank you for your reply :)
You made good point about Jesus and people who knew Jesus did not take Him seriously.
And I'm having the same problem, they don't take me seriously as they should...

Hi Jari,

Welcome to the forum.

As airIam2worship said, Jesus told us that it would be the hardest to witness to our own. Jesus did however make believers of at least some of His earthly family.

The best way is through the way that we live our lives. Being the best role model that we possibly can be is a wonderful witnessing tool. Letting them see how Jesus has worked in our own lives. Then we must not forget to pray for them daily, that Jesus will open their eyes and hearts to His word. Ask for Gods guidance, that He will give you the right words at the right time.

I will also add you and your family to my prayer list.

Thank you Roger.
You both give good advice. I must pray for them more often, daily.

I just want to praize the Lord for giving me His spirit to do the talking! I have witnessed to people in my family today and thank God for that!

Amen Jari, Hallelujah. I will keep praying for you and your family

Jari, I don't know if your out there or not but, do you have any up-date on your family?  I've been praying for you, witnessing to them.

Great questions, and great answers!


(http://www.rr-bb.com/images/smilies/hug.gif)  I sense your frustration Jari, but hang in there.     I echo what someone in a previous post said.   You are already going about this the right way.  Talking with them about things and sharing.  Don't get discouraged.  Scripture says that Gods word does not return to Him void.   Just live for Christ and let your life be a mirror that reflects Christ to them.  He will take care of the heart changes and heavy lifting, your just simply the messenger.    I also will keep this in prayer.

Blessings!

Jari,

I agree with others here that witnessing to family members and friends is the hardest. Usually because they knew us before we were saved and they might think that we are being judgmental (even though we are not – our motivation is for their eternal destination).  This makes your ‘Christian Walk’ so important for them to see.
1st – Pray, pray, pray, pray & never stop praying for them.
-The biggest problem with people, that I have witnessed to, is that they don’t fear God. Why should they fear God, they’ve been taught that God is Love and God saves peoples souls, and God forgives sins. The problem is that the Bible tells us that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom (Ps 111:10). Heb 10:31 Why is it that we fear the Lord? See Heb 9:27, it is destined for man to die once and after this the judgment. It is the Judgment of God that we fear. Why do we fear his judgment? It is the second death that we fear, Hell and the eventual Lake of Fire destination – see Rev 2:11, 20:14, 20:6, 21:8.  Your family members need to be awakened to the path that they are on. I would advise that you talk to your family members with Love & concern, one on one with nobody else around. Reason with them, explaining everything you can, if a question comes up you can’t answer immediately – don’t get nervous and think you’ve blown it, just calmly tell them you’ll need to do some research to answer that question (don’t stop though). Show them the tears in your eye and the compassion in your voice for their souls – this is serious stuff.
Prov. 20:6 says that most men will proclaim their own goodness. 
They need to know that God will not allow sin into Heaven. Show them what sin is; Sin is transgression of The Law (1 John 3:4), at least part of ‘The Law’ is the 10 Commandments (Rom 7:7). Take them thru a couple;
(very important ->don’t be judgmental, do it in a light open give & take discussion – acknowledge that you’ve broken them too but they need to answer verbally so they can see for themselves what your talking about)
9-Have you ever lied? (they answer) Then you say - You would be a liar/just like me I’ve done that.
8-Have you ever stolen anything (regardless of value)? (answer)You would be a thief/I’ve done this too
3-Have you ever used God’s name in vain or as a cuss word? (answer) It’s called blasphemy/I’m guilty also.
7-Have you ever looked at someone with Lust? (answer)You would be an adulterer/just like me.

Tell them – OK here’s the bad news;
9 – see Rev 21:8 all liars will have there place  in the lake of fire.
8 – see 1 Cor 6:10 No thief will inherit the Kingdom of Heaven
3 – Ex 20:7 The Lord will not hold him guiltless that uses his name in vain.
7 – Matt 5:28 Jesus in the sermon on the mount equates looking with lust to adultery.

This is heavy stuff and the Holy Spirit will bring the conviction of sin upon their heart. I believe this is why our enemy is trying to get rid of the 10 Commandments from all public places (starting with schools and courthouses-that’s for another thread).

Ask them – if God judges you by the 10 Commandments will you be innocent? They will have already confessed guilt (9,8,3,7).
Ask them, what are you going to say/do on the Day of Judgment? (there’s nothing that We can do/say)
When you see conviction come upon them – tell them that God knew we couldn’t keep his perfect moral Laws, so he made a way, only 1 way.
Then share the Gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ. We broke the Law and Jesus paid our fine – but there’s 2 requirements to have your account paid in full by Jesus.
If we repent and put our complete trust in Jesus’ work on the cross & his resurrection, we can be saved through him.
Many people don’t fear God because they don’t have a Biblical understanding of Hell.
 Shame and everlasting contempt” (Dan 12:2)
“Everlasting punishment” (Matt 25:46)
“Weeping and gnashing of teeth” (Matt 24:51)
“Fire unquenchable” (Lk 3:17)
“Indignation and wrath, tribulation and anguish” (Rom 2:8,9)
“Everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord” (2 Thes 1:9)
“Eternal fire...the blackness of darkness for ever” (Jude 7:13)
Rev 14:10-11 tells us the final, eternal destiny of the sinner: “He shall be tormented with fire and brimstone...the smoke of their torment ascended up for ever and ever: and they have no rest day or night."
Show your Mom James 2:19 – Even the demons believe & tremble (but they won’t repent)
This method is called Law to the Proud & Grace to the humble. It is based on Jesus’ personal witnessing to the woman at the well (Jn 4) and the rich young man (Mk 10). It might seem harsh, but sinners need to be awakened to their destiny with God’s judgment. It’s like this, a father grabs his young son from running across the road. The son cries and says his dad is mean and won’t let him cross the road. However, the father saw the semi-truck barreling towards his son and out of his love for his son he snatched his son from a certain death.  Sinners are on a path that leads to certain death & the lake of fire. It’s our job to snatch as many as we can from certain & eternal death.

Thank you all for the replies!
And also thank you for the prayers, I have not read this forum for a while but thank God I read your posts now so I may tell some good news.
The situation has improved in a way that I have grown in Christ and I am able to witness much better to them today, so thank Jesus for that! I am also hopeful that my mom would come to church with me some time, she says she has been there before - which I dont doupt - but I can only imagine why she stopped going (she still says she believes - but is not reborn). It's the same church where Jesus lead me just half year a go and I was recently babtized! So like I said thanks to Jesus that I have grown because even God doesnt need me He can use me (I do not wish to say "use better" or more efficently).
So I just need to keep witnessing to them love of God and show them how I am not building upon earth anymore because there is better - and now I really need to do this every day and not go with the flow of this world.

But of course need to keep in mind that only Holy spirit can soften their hard hearts.

Pk, what you said "Show them the tears in your eye and the compassion in your voice for their souls – this is serious stuff. " was a good advice, I need to show them how it hurts when they are in the darkness.

I thank God for you all and your prayers.

God bless.

Jari, thank you for the update, I am still praying for you and your family. Don't give up!

I wont. :)

God bless.

Thanks for the update Jari. Praying for you & your family.

Thank you.
My mom is difficult because she says she believes but have no assurance of salvation because according to her own words she cannot possibly know. And even I tried to tell her that God does give the faith and assurance of salvation she did not seem to care about this because she seems to be satisfied on her life... I think she is afraid to find out the truth because not many people (including her friends) believe and of course she has her own thoughts of what will happen to them (what she hopes) but she must understand that Jesus is the only way to Heaven. I have spoken a few times that we should tell people about Christ so that they too might be saved but I don't know... she said she has spoken with people about god.
Well I don't know about God's plan of salvation in her case - how it will go and when will she see - but she must come to understanding Jesus gives peace unlike anything in this world.
My little bro said to me when I asked that he simply is not interested and I understand this because he is living a good life right now. So I imagine it takes some time.

I thought you might want to know little bit about them so that's why I said that.

God bless.

Jari,

I know how it must pain you to see your family walk in the ways of this world.  There has been some good advice given to you on this thread.  I would echo much (but not all) of what has already been said by some of the others. 

If you have been born again, you are a new creation and your life will reflect Christ  to those who know you best (especially those who knew you before your conversion).

Living your life for Christ will obviously be the most grueling aspect of your witness to your family because your life will be scrutinized and criticized at every moment by them. ( I speak from experience on that one).  However, living your life is NOT enough!  This is a point in which I respectfully disagree with some of my brothers on this thread.  Your family must be presented with the Gospel.  The Gospel is the power of God unto salvation.  Living a good clean, moral life is not going to get it done.  If living a good life was all it took, then your family may end up joining one the cults like the Mormon church.  Mormons live some of the most morally upright lives of any people I have ever encountered  yet they are in total darkness spiritually.

PK is absolutely right.  Your family obviously has no fear of the Lord in them.  Hebrews 10 says that it is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the Living God.  They don’t fear Him probably because they have been surrounded by a “man-centered” form of Christianity (which is not true Christianity)  I strongly advise you against trying to  sell your family all the benefits of Christianity.  If you try to “sell” them on Christianity with words like peace, purpose, fulfillment, joy, happiness,  etc.,  you are giving your family a false sense of Christianity.  These things are by-products of the faith but should never be used as “fish bait” trying to lure potential converts to the faith.  If they bite on the “happy” gospel that you sell them I guarantee you that in a few years, they will completely walk away from their false faith as soon as tribulation hits  (See the thorny ground hearer in the parable of the sower Mark 4).  This type of conversion is called a false conversion.  We are producing false conversions in America by the millions every year with the “Come to Jesus and be happy” gospel. 

Jesus’ message was always given in love but His message created such a stir in the towns where He preached,  the people attempted to take His life 10 different times before He went to the Cross.  If He had preached a message of purpose and peace, this never would have happened.  In Matthew 10, Jesus said that He did not come to bring peace but a sword.  A sword that will divide families.  I know you love your family.  Love them enough to be completely honest with them.  According to Jesus, you may lose relationships within your family.  Count the cost Jari.  If your family dies only knowing that God is real, they will spend eternity in the flames of Hell.  God forbid!  With tears, Plead with them!!  Do as PK said, show them their sin by laying out the 10 commandments before them.  Show them how filthy they are and then explain that the blood of Christ is the only thing that will cleanse them from their sin. 

If they don’t see the problem, they will never cry out for the solution.  Would a patient let a doctor perform brain surgery on him if he thinks that there is nothing wrong with his brain?  Highly unlikely!  But if the doctor takes the time to show the patient  the tumor that is growing on his brain, then the patient will cry out for the surgery that is necessary to remove the problem.  Sin must become exceedingly sinful for grace to abound.  Let  them see what their sin cost Jesus.  The law (10 commandments) will lead them to the foot of the blood stained cross where they can be reconciled to God.  Where sin abounds grace does much more abound!!  Grace cost our Savior His life, that’s not cheap grace!!!

(Link removed due to advertising.)

May God Bless You Jari,

Neil

Hello Street Preacher,

You must have missed it because there is already a mixture of witnessing, testimony, and prayer in this thread. This is the sum of all that can be done, and it many times doesn't work or it takes a lengthy amount of time to work. This is obviously a big burden for a Christian to carry around when a loved one is lost. Many sweet Christians have tried for years to point a loved one to CHRIST, and this area is mainly for additional methods and ideas about what to do and how to do it. I personally believe that prayer is the most important thing before, during, and after numerous attempts to help someone. After all, it is the Holy Spirit who guides us, and it's the Holy Spirit who softens the hearts of the lost. Without the help of GOD, nothing is going to work.

Love In Christ,
Tom

Titus 3:4-7 NASB  But when the kindness of God our Savior and His love for mankind appeared, He saved us, not on the basis of deeds which we have done in righteousness, but according to His mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewing by the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out upon us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that being justified by His grace we would be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life.

Actually, I read the whole thread and I'm not sure what I missed.

 I apologize if I came across as seeming unloving or uncaring.  I sympathize deeply with Jari.  My extended family is it's own sorted mess but my family is just as lost as hers.  I have been praying and witnessing, and yes,, letting my light shine before men for several years.  So I may have misunderstood the point you were trying to make Tom.

 Of course the work is that of the Holy Spirit.  Of course all the Glory for the salvation of sinners belongs to Jesus Christ.  I wouldn't dare pretend otherwise.  I am in complete agreement with all these points.  I was simply trying to back up pk's points about sharing the Gospel with lost family members.   

I've heard it said that salvation of the lost is much like Jesus calling Lazarus from the dead.  It is our job to roll the stone (aka stony heart) away but it is Jesus that calls dead men to live.  It is His voice that calls them. 

That being said, the Bible is clear that He chooses to manifest His word through  preaching (Titus 1:3-emphasis mine)  Being considered "preachy" has such negative connotations. Jari, if you seem to be preaching to your family, then God Bless you because it is how God will manifest His word to your family.  He doesn't choose to save sinners through NY Times best sellers, entertainment, pizza parties,  tickling their ears, or promising them their Best Life Now.  This is all man-made stuff that I was trying to encourage Jari to avoid at all costs.  (I saw her eluding to using the God will give you purpose and joy routhine but didn't see anyone else discouraging it!)

Her family needs to see (individually) that they have violated God's Holy Law and there needs to be Godly Sorrow that works  repentance leading to salvation not to be repented of (2 Cor. 7:10).  If they lack Godly sorrow because they haven' seen themselves in truth (in light of God's law) and how filthy we all are they won't cry out to be made clean.  They have angerd God with their sin.  God is angry with the wicked every day (Ps. 7:11).  And yet He still loves the world enough die for these same wicked people like Jari's family and ME.

Jari, you seem like you may be a pretty young Christian.  Please know that it is very difficult for truth to come acorss as loving on a message board.  My heart truly breaks for you.  I would love for the last post on this thread to be the testimonies of all your family members being saved.

I merely stand to warn you that as a Christian, you will be bombarded with false information about Jesus that is of the Devil.  Many false teachers and teachings according to (2 Peter 2:1) about what is best and what is true but the Bible calls  dangerous heresies.   Bury yourself in God's Holy word to find your answers. I'm sure that the folks on this board are Godly but let God's word be your primary source of advice regading your lost family members.

You will find in His word that God is not so much worried about yours, mine, or anyone's purpose as much as He desires all men to come to repentance (2 Peter 3:9.)  You will hear some say that repentance isn't that important.  (One of those dangerous heresies we just talked about)...If they say that, they are deceived and are certainly not speaking under God's authority (see Luke 13:3)  Your family members, my family members, and this whole world must repent (turn from) their sins and put their faith in Jesus Christ.

Re-Read what  PK said.  He is right on point with what he said.  Continually pray (and potentially fast) for your family.  Continue to shed tears before God and Let your love for them compel you to step outside of your comfort zone and share with them the Gospel even if it costs you the relationship.  Very, very, Very Difficult to do with those you love but God will honor your sacrifice.  He may even honor it by saving your loved ones....God bless you

Neil

street preacher,

I say amen to all you said. I think that you may have misunderstood what others have said in this thread. It is important for a person to insure the word is given to lost family members. For faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God. However it was said that one of the most important tools in this witnessing is by one's actions. As you yourself said, effective witnessing does not come through the ways of this world (entertainment, pizza parties, etc. ). To be an effective witness one must show forth the fruits.

Hi street preacher, I read your first post on this second page and I am glad that you wrote and I am going to reply now before reading on.
I feel like I have already lost most of the relationsship with my family because my brother and sister dont have anything common with me anymore since our lives are so different now. I try to talk with them about anything I can to keep relationship with them but its difficult. However I have told my family that "Jesus saves" "forgives all sin" and I think I have said "Jesus saves from perishing" to all of them. But I dont remember have I spoken about the flames of hell which I of course believe is the rightful judgement to every one not washed clean in the blood of Jesus. But I have said to my brother "give your life to Jesus, its great" because it is great, like you know. But they are all so unterested and fortunately at least I can say that they wont go to any mormonism religion because they are that much, uninterested.
I'm about to get a Bible for my dad (I gave him NT already) because he said he wants to start reading the whole bible but his attidute is maybe some one buys it for me when I get 50 (years) (which is still half a year way). But I will keep telling him that he needs to take the step towards God or turn to God and ask to forgive Him his sins and he will be forgiven. I have said that before to him but I dont know for sure what he thinks about it.
Well I dont want to write too much about the details, just wrote this so that you may know what I have been trying - which should all be of course something else than my own way of witnessing and that is the way Jesus spoke, in love, in truth.

God bless.