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i need some advise, i attend college and this past fall semester i prayed to God to send a nisce my way one week later this guy shows up in my life and everywhere i was at on campus this was their too, do you Think God is trying to tell me something. this guy went out of his way for me to notice him and now that i did i like him now and i know he likes me. were both shy but we give out hints we like each other he's really nice a real gentlemen. right befoe the semester ended i gave him card / letter with my number he has not called i understand we just barely know each other.by him telling how wonderful and sweet he is. i saw him later after he read the card/ letter and he really was happy and had a very big smile and wink to me. i 'm very confused on what to do about this guy i feel he's afraid to open up like he's been hurt but he also works late and travels alot to see his family. this guy also knows i'm shy around him cause i would never go up and talk to him i always let him approach me first i guess i was afraid i would scare him away but i would let him though know i was interested.

I think it's great you found a guy you like. And he sounds really nice. You mentioned you bump into each other a lot, but to determine whether it is is God giving you a nudge or not, I'd pray about it and look carefully into the character of the guy. If He's very godly and a good spiritual leader, it may be.

What I would do if I were in your shoes, is to go ahead and meet other people, wait on the Lord and pray about it, and if this guy comes around, great! If not, you'll have made some new friends and kept the door open for Mr. Right.

Blessings,
Whitehorse

Quote from: prsawyer on December 30, 2003, 07:37:14 PM

Let him know you care.

i did pray about it on what to do about this guy. i asked God if i should give this guy a card/ letter by telling him how sweet and wonderful also if i need to ask this guy to lunch seeing he always hinted for me to lunch. something gave me the strength and courage i'm not saying God made me do this but i feel like God was with me cause, i have never asked a guy out and never gave them a card/letter expressing how i feel, i've always let the guy make the first move cause, this guy never would never would ask me for my name i had to make the first move on that. now deterimine this guy has a godly character i feel like yes he does.

i beleive he's intrested why else would he ask if i'm married or have a boyfriend and be so curious on my life but i want to start slow with this guy. i beleive he's afraid and he's really busy with work and school and besides i will see him next semester.

Thanks, Sincereheart! I enjoy your posts, too! :)

Pr, maybe this is an issue of needing to take things slowly. I wouldn't let him know how you feel too soon, because guys can be kind of commitment-shy at the beginning, and if they get any sense that a woman is trying to lock them in, it can scare them away. Maybe the best thing to do now is to just lay low for awhile. If you see him around, maybe offer a casual smile without really even saying hi. Friendly, but not particular.

You may feel tempted to do the opposite, especially when you really like him. But it might be an expensive way to go; if he's just looking to meet people as friends until he knows them better, friendly-but-not-particular is a better way to adapt to his personality

By all means; if you think he's afraid, I'd give him room. This way you won't miss out on an opportunity to meet a really great guy.
;)

thanks for the advise i do want to take things slow but i did not just come out and say i like you. all i did in the card/ letter was an appreciation of him being nice and making me feel special also what a wonderful/ sweet person he is. by me doing this it did not scare him away what a mean is when i saw him at school after given him the letter/ card he spoke to me and smiled i really impressed him. i will give him room just like i think he feels that i need room to after all we just met and we barely know each other but their is some interest he's showing my way to get me to notice him.

I start back at school on jan 15th. i will see what happens between me and him and beleive you me i want to take it slow and not mess things up. with me being shy and him somewhat shy around each other and thanks for praying for me and this guy i will see whatever God's will is but i feel like their is a reason why God put this guy in my life cause, he came in my life after i prayed to God to send somebody my way i guess i will see.

i started back and i saw him eating lunch but he was eating with people from his class. he did see me but i think he thought i did not see him i did not want to be too obvious my back was to him so all i could do look over my shoulder to see if he notice me and he did by staring at me the whole time and then made sure i saw him when he left by walking by the window. were just both afraid to approach one another in a crowd of people which that is the only time we see each other is in the lunch room so how can two people who are shy get together and know one another. is this possible thru God that two shy people can get together if it's Gods will and with our busy schedule with school and work that me and this guy will be able to get to know each other better thru Gods will. seeing that i prayed to send me a nice guy and this guy came into my life and even though i was apart over a month i still thought about him a lot and prayed each day to God about this guy and my life so how else can me / him start a relationship if were both busy with work/ school even though i can not get him out of my head.

thanks for the advice but this guy is at school all day and does not eat lunch a lot of times. also he wears like the same clothes at school now this does not bother me i do not care if he's rich or poor and i do not want to come out and say this to him cause i care too much for him. i feel like he wants to go out by him mentioning lunch to me. i think he feels like he has no chance with me by being in college and if he's on a tight budget cause he visits his family a lot in WI and him living in Tn. i did talk to him this week at school which made him feel special instead of me waiting for him to talk to me. i just worry about him not eating enough, working and taking a lot of hours in school , visiting his family a lot with no time on his hands.

Thanks, Sincereheart! I enjoy your posts, too! :)

PR, it's a rare guy who does his laundry in college. I hate to tell you this, but it's true-that might be another reason. And that, I think, is why God invented wives to care for them. Left to their own devices, well...let's just say it's a good thing God invented women.

I'm glad you enjoyed talking to him. It sounds like things are going well. And it sounds like he leads a busy life. Also a good sign he spends a lot of time with his family.

yes he does and i'm busy too with school , work and my family. but i do not want him to think i've lost interest.i saw him at school and usually i would let him approach me seeing i'm a shy person but instead i approached him and we were both glad to see each other and we talked for awhile. i will see what God has plan for me and this guy if it's Gods will.

this week at school i have saw him twice and he was really happy to see me. he did not once ignore me even though last semester i gave him a card / letter telling what a sweet, wonderul and nice person he is and how he made me feel special on the things he said and done for me. i 've only had the guts once to walk up to him and say hello cause i'm afraid if i say anything i'll scare him away. he's really the one that does most of the talking while i freeze up and panic which i beleive he knows it because he always speaks to me and tries to get me to talk. i've prayed to God to give me courage and give the guy i like more courage and open to me i've just been hurt a lot in the past and i do not know what to do.

It sounds like you're taking cues from him, which is a good thing, if you feel he's timid. You've expressed interest but haven't left his feelings out of the decision, either. What guy doesn't like that?

Yep-pain is all part of the process. There's no getting through dating or even marriage without it. I do still feel concerned about his spiritual beliefs, though, because that is crucial. I'm concerned that you'll develop an attachment to him, only to find out he isn't devoted to the Lord with his whole lifestyle. I even know of people who were in seminary that I'm certain didn't know the Lord, so this one takes a lot of time to really determine. Maybe if you watch for cues, see whether he invites you to church, see what kind (if any) church he goes to, whether he's involved, and that sort of thing. That is truly a better way to determine whether this really is God's will.

We're rooting for you. :)

he's only hinted to me about lunch and he works full time and takes about 20hrs in school like most college students we have to work on the week-ends. he does know that i have a brother who is a pastor which this guy did not ignore me or look at me funny when i mention that he still talks to me and i do wear a cross necklace and does'nt seem to bother him like most guys i've thought they were great or went out on a date with and does not like the fact i wear a cross necklace or a brother who's in the minstry. not this guy he talks to me more and ask alot of personal questions like if i'm married or have a bf or what is my plans after college where i'm going to live do i want to get married and have children.

Wow-he's asking the big questions. So it sounds like he's looking for compatibility, then. THat's a good sign. I'm thinking this would definitely be the time to start bringing up your faith. Maybe invite him to church. If he's truly God's will, he'd be delighted by that. If he's offended, that would be a sign.

I wouldn't worry about being disappointed if he's offended, though, because it's better to find out now than later if he isn't a Christian.

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Fellowship => Just For Women => Topic started by: prsawyer on December 30, 2003, 07:37:14 PM