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I just speak the truth with force and very bluntly! Christians are becoming too nice and lukewarm!

Jesus didn't say that we can have our own beliefs, he said that there is only one belief!

I was on another site and said that Halloween is evil and should not be playing the Halloween games they had made. However even Christians said I was pushing! Am I not allowed to speak the truth?

Finally, my ex friend sissy, supports Halloween and made alot of the games! What a hypocrit! I don't love her anymore and won't let her hurt me again! 

There definitely is nothing wrong with telling the truth. Sometimes though once we have given the truth we then need to leave those alone that refuse to hear the truth and move on to those that are willing to listen. I am sorry that things turned out the way it did with your friend, sissy. Praise God we have a friend in Jesus and He will not lead us wrong.

David please remember you have quite a few friends here on C.U. Yes you are allowed to speak the truth brother, and I also agree with P.R. Some times you have to back away, after you have told them the truth.

I understand but I think we back away too quickly and easily sometimes  :(

It is difficult to discern when we should back away and when we shouldn't. If we spend too much time with those that refuse to listen after we have tried numerous times then we are wasting time that could be spent with those that do want to hear. Brother Bob said something that is very true also. Sometimes it is necessary for us to back off, not to give up altogether but just to back off for awhile. It is not easy to convince a person that something is a sin when they don't really know Jesus or are a babe in Christ. We need to plant the seed and then let God work on them.

There are somethings that we need to be pushy in. One of these things is our freedom to speak and tell others of Christ. If we back down on that then we will end up not being able to speak even to those that are willing to listen. Pushing on those that refuse to hear the truth does not get us anywhere. Even Jesus did not do that. Those that refused to listen to Him He let go their own way.

David:

While I agree we as Christians often times don't stand firm when we need to, sometimes we don't move on when we ought either.  As Mark 6:11 says, "And whosoever shall not receive you, nor hear you, when ye depart thence, shake off the dust under your feet for a testimony against them. Verily I say unto you, It shall be more tolerable for Sodom and Gomorrah in the day of judgment, than for that city."

As Pastor Roger pointed out it is difficult to discern when to do either.  Also agree wwith hat he said about seed sowing.  You may be the one to plant the seed, while someone else might come along and harvest the seed. 

I will pray for us all that we act with right motives and walk in the Spirit of discernment.

Love you and God Bless, Eva

Thank you brothers and sister eva.

It has not been my experience that Christians are all that nice. I was condemned in two churches because of being divorced. My wife committed adultery many times over--including with my relatives, and then told me, "I WON'T change!" Yet, I was condemned.

I've seen churches split over silly things like not being able to agree on the color of the new carpet, or because the pastor and deacons made a decision without consulting the members. It was a minor decision to fill in some windows for security's sake.

As for whether or not to celebrate Halloween, I don't and don't think Christian's should. However, I don't reject those who do. They don't have to answer to me but to God. To stop loving someone because they believe differently isn't very Christian in my opinion.

Those two churches are wrong and I would question if they really are Christians. You getting divorced was indeed right.

Now about sissy. She would say one thing and do another. She said she would never steer me wrong, yet almost took me off God's path. I loved and trusted her but no more.

Hi Jon-Marc,

I am sure that the love you had for your wife must have changed somewhat after those incidents. Sure there should be a love for her still but I am sure that it must have changed somewhat. This is what David was talking about in concerns with Sissy. Perhaps this is the same thing that you experienced with those churches that condemned you? Should he be yoked with an unbeliever?

Yes, there are those that claim to be Christian that harbor hate and will hate over the most ridiculous things. It is a difficult thing for people to learn to love in the manner that Jesus has taught us to. People tend to want to take it to one extreme or the other. I could be reading your post wrong as well as other posts you have made (after all I cannot see what is in your heart) but they seem to indicate some bitterness being harbored there against those that condemned you?

Jon Marc:

I can really relate. I experienced the same thing at my old Church.  As long as I was playing the loving, forgiving wife role all was well.  That all changed when I finally stood up for myself.

God does say love and forgive. And oh how long I suffered, walking this lopsided teaching.   I have since learned that loving means letting someone go to pursue their own happiness.

The Bible also says not to be unequally yoked, adultery is grounds for divorce, if the non-believer wants to depart..., He came to give me life and give it more abundantly and many other things.

Forgiveness is freeing though, keeps the bitterness and resentment from building up and poisoning the soul.

We all need to learn to love and accept others.

I will be praying for you brother we all need prayer.

Thanks and God Bless, Eva

My misunderstanding from what he wrote was that he quit loving her because she believes in Halloween. I can certainly understand losing ones love for someone under the right conditions. My second wife after two weeks of marriage started sleeping on the sofa and criticized EVERYTHING I said and did. I couldn't say or do anything right. I continued to love her despite the constant criticism. The more she criticized, the more i tried to please her. After nearly 8 months of constant criticism I gave up. We parted and she divorced me because I wasn't perfect like she was. ::) I have no love left for either of them.

As for the churches where I was judged and condemned for being divorced--yes, perhaps there is still some bitterness and anger left over. I have a serious problem with "Christians" who judge and condemn other believers because of divorce, and "Christians" who can't get along because they have minor disagreements. I used to be one of those hypocritical, judgmental people as a new believer, but God taught me that He is the ONLY One who has the right to judge and condemn. I am in no position to throw stones, but that doesn't stop me from being angry about injustice.

Jon-Marc:

No one likes to be criticized, particularly by those those closest to us and those professing to be Christians. I know both from experience. You had a great point about God being the Judge and we have no right to cast the first stone-Amen to that.  I remind myself of that often.

It also helps me to remember that we are all at different levels of maturity regrading our walks with God. But, He is completing a work on all of us, until the day Christ returns.

It also helps me to remember that going to Church does not a Christian make.  Bearing fruit is the evidence of our relationship with Christ.

I will pray for you as you walk with God, may He bless you beyond your wildest dreams.

Love in Christ, Eva

Rejecting a person or putting them down because of a divorce is not right. I can see a church not allowing a divorced person in any major position of leadership. That is simply scriptural nothing more or less to it. I dislike using the "do not judge" verse too often as it is being hi-jacked and abused by those that wish to substantiate their continuing in a life of sin and use it as a safeguard to keep others from preaching on sin. There is a fine line to be drawn between judging others and in judging sin, between condemning an individual and condemning a sin. There is also a problem in making such judgments without having all of the facts known and it is not always our place to know all of the facts in regards to others.

What have I done? I did push and now I have lost my friend sissy. :'( I am an idiot.  :'( I couldn't stop my pushing and now have lost my friend sissy  :'(

Brother David, Think on this a minute did you lose a friend? Or did you lose an acquaintance? A friend would not so easily get upset and leave over this.

AMEN!!

A true friend will stick with you, through thick and thin no matter what.

we will see shortly

Hey David:

I agree that if Sissy is a true friend she will be with you through thick and thin.

Don't forget making amends and forgiveness go hand in hand.

Will be praying over you and your friendship.

Love in Christ, Eva 

I was looking back at what I said and it isn't pushing she is mad at, I judged and called her religion false. She has every right not to be friend anymore and hate me  :'(

Brother David, you wouldn't be much of a friend if you didn't tell her the truth of the Gospel.

but we are to love and respect each other. I HURT HER ALOT! Now I have to live with this guilt until she talks to me

Hello Brother David,

Eternity is at stake so this is much more important than temporary hurt feelings, but I still understand. Salvation conversations get pretty hot even within someone's own family. I'm glad that I don't have the burden of thinking that someone in my family is lost. This is something I give thanks for every day because I love them, care for them, and want to spend eternity together with them in Heaven. What could be more important than this?

Brother David, I do know Christians who struggle with the burden of a lost friend or family member every day of their lives. There obviously isn't any desire to hurt them - just the opposite. It might or might not help to explain why it's so important that you share JESUS CHRIST and the CROSS with them. You don't want them to spend eternity in Hell. You're not trying to hurt them or make them mad, rather you want CHRIST to rescue them from the horrible wrath to come. Witnessing with friends and family members is many times a very difficult and unpleasant task. Things are really the opposite of what the WORLD considers on this subject. It really boils down to do we care enough to try and keep trying. We should always pray and ask GOD to help us, but that still doesn't mean that it will be easy.

Love In Christ,
Tom

Romans 4:22-25 NASB
Therefore IT WAS ALSO CREDITED TO HIM AS RIGHTEOUSNESS. Now not for his sake only was it written that it was credited to him, but for our sake also, to whom it will be credited, as those who believe in Him who raised Jesus our Lord from the dead, He who was delivered over because of our transgressions, and was raised because of our justification. "BLESSED ARE THOSE WHOSE LAWLESS DEEDS HAVE BEEN FORGIVEN, AND WHOSE SINS HAVE BEEN COVERED.  "BLESSED IS THE MAN WHOSE SIN THE LORD WILL NOT TAKE INTO ACCOUNT."

Brother, thank you but that isn't what I was doing. You would need alot of information to understand what exactly is going on.

I am indeed in the wrong. Please understand that much. I lost a great friend

Good Morning Brother David!

Brother, I'll just pray for you. Let me know if there is something I can do to help you, and I'll do my best.

Love In Christ,
Tom

However, we are told to "speak the truth in love." Too often people try to justify criticism by saying, "I'm only saying it because I care." I'm afraid I've been guilty more times than I care to count of criticizing and NOT doing it in love.

Amen. Exactly what I did to hurt sissy