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Clothing Our Children

I was raised in a climate where the winters were cold and the summers were hot. My mother always reminded us to dress according to weather. I clearly remember her telling us kids to "Put on a coat. I don't want you getting sick." With 8 kids in the family that was pretty important as once one of us got sick it was a sure thing that everyone else would soon be sick also. My mother had a big enough job on her hands trying to take care of all of us when we were healthy. It became a really big job when we were all sick especially if she was sick also. My mother never complained though, taking care of us under any circumstances to the best of her ability. Most good parents don't want to see their children sick, not because of the extra work it might cause them. They don't want to see their children needlessly suffering when it could have been avoided by dressing according to the weather.

 God is much like this also. He provides us a way to "dress" to avoid spiritual sickness. The "weather" today is very cold. Our children are exposed to a lot of this "cold" in everyday things all around them. It is becoming more and more difficult to keep them clothed to protect them against this cold.

There are many influences in this world that will make our children spiritually sick. We see many people that are touted by the media as role models for our children that are far from being a good example for them to follow. Many of these people are claimed to be heroes for "being themselves" and standing up for their decadent lifestyles. With the advent of computers and the internet this media is even more readily available to our children.

We need to insure that we are clothing our children in appropriate clothing to prepare them and to protect them from these moral illnesses. It is more important than ever for Christians to take a stand against these illnesses. We must join together in prayer and in actions of a Godly nature to insure the safety and future well-being of our children.

We at Christians Unite attempt to make all of Christians Unite a safe place for children. We also make it a point to join together in support of each other in prayer and discussions to further the word of God. To help strengthen each other to face the problems that we and our children must face in this increasingly evil world.

We would like to extend an invitation to all, adults and children alike, to join us on the forum in this endeavor.

Eph 6:11  Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.
Eph 6:12  For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
Eph 6:13  Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

2Co 10:3  For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh:
2Co 10:4  (For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;)
2Co 10:5  Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;
2Co 10:6  And having in a readiness to revenge all disobedience, when your obedience is fulfilled.
2Co 10:7  Do ye look on things after the outward appearance? ....

1Th 5:8  But let us, who are of the day, be sober, putting on the breastplate of faith and love; and for an helmet, the hope of salvation.
1Th 5:9  For God hath not appointed us to wrath, but to obtain salvation by our Lord Jesus Christ,
1Th 5:10  Who died for us, that, whether we wake or sleep, we should live together with him.
1Th 5:11  Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do.

2Co 4:4  In whom the god of this world hath blinded the minds of them which believe not, lest the light of the glorious gospel of Christ, who is the image of God, should shine unto them.

Eph 2:2  Wherein in time past ye walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience:

AMEN Pastor Roger - AMEN!

Brother, I hope and pray that all Christians read this, do an expanded study on the Scriptures listed, and pray that GOD helps us in our struggles day by day.

As mature Christians, many of us know how GOD prepares us to walk through, around, or over evil without it attaching itself to us and starting a malignancy that will consume us. We also know about the power of evil and don't play with it. The same can't be true for our children and the babes in Christ. So, we all have a responsibility to prepare our children and strengthen the babes in Christ. Our task becomes easier when we join together, pray for each other, and encourage each other along the way. This is just one of the benefits of assembling together and having fellowship together.

I couldn't do very much during my recent illness, so I had a chance to watch some television. I usually don't watch very much television, so I did a lot of channel flipping trying to find decent programs to watch. It became apparent pretty quickly that the devil is bombarding all of us with filth and garbage around the clock. The stench is in just about every form of media. The devil is a skilled craftsman in catching his prey, and he is even more skilled in devouring his prey after they are snared. As Christians, we must not take the devil lightly, as he is a formidable enemy of GOD, the Cross, morals, and everything we hold dear. It would be naive to think that we are mature and beyond temptation. If we don't walk daily in the strength and power of GOD, the devil can at least temporarily snare us, weaken or destroy our testimony, and cause a setback of our fellowship with GOD. We've been talking about mature Christians, so we can only imagine what the devil can do with the lost or the babes in Christ. We must know that the lost or the babes in Christ might be our own children and grandchildren, so we each have some huge responsibilities.

Brothers and Sisters, I'm hoping this becomes an excellent discussion thread with all kinds of ideas about how we become STRONG in the LORD and how we help others to become STRONG in the LORD. I'm hoping that Christian parents and grandparents share with each other and exchange methods that can be used to prepare our children for an increasingly evil world.

We must not be naive and be fooled. The devil, demons, and fallen angels are all completely real. They are just as real as we are, and they are among us fighting GOD for the souls of men. This isn't a horror show on television, rather it is completely real and happening all around us every day. Some Christians might say that the devil can't get them because their heart is already Sealed with the Holy Spirit of GOD. That would be a true statement, but the devil could ruin your influence, impact, and testimony as a Christian. In fact, disarming you as a strong and influential Christian would be a worthy goal for the devil. Maybe the devil can spoil the work you were prepared to do and wanted to do. How many others can be impacted if the devil is allowed to ruin your testimony for Christ?

Brothers and Sisters, whether you believe it or not, there is Spiritual Warfare going on around us 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The powers of darkness are busy, and part of this evil effort might be escalating because the end of this age is in view. Let's not dwell on an argument about whether these are the end days of this age or not. Instead, let us concentrate on how to prepare ourselves and our children for Spiritual Warfare. GOD will be with us if we pray and ask HIM to be. Our desire to do GOD'S Will and please HIM will obviously have much to do with how much GOD helps us in our day to day struggles.

I really think this subject has the potential to be one of the most important discussions we've had on Christians Unite in a long time. This is also a subject that will probably not involve any disagreement, so it's the perfect thread to become involved in. Who's going to disagree that we struggle against increasing evil in our daily lives? I really can't imagine any Christian believing that this world is becoming better and more moral. In fact, the moral decay is accelerating by the day, and all of us should be able to easily see this. Christians are not of this world, but we must abide here during this short life. Our real citizenship is in Heaven, but we can't go home yet. So, what do we do for ourselves and our children. A better way to put this would be, "What do we ask GOD to do in us, through us, and for us and our children?" What portions of the Bible apply to the warfare that is SURE to await us and our children?

Brothers and Sisters, if you've been looking for a good and worthy discussion to jump into, THIS IS IT!

Hi!  I've been a security guard for ten years.  For the past few months, the carbon monoxide in the parking garage at my job has been giving me problems with my lungs.  I was baby sitting with a three week old boy, that belongs to a friend of mine.  I was watching the news about a woman who dressed up in scrubs and took an infant out of a hospital.  I don't have any children, but while I was holding that little fellow, I could only imagine how it would feel to have him taken away.  My heart was so touched that I'm going out tomorrow to a hospital to see if I can get a job there as a security officer at their infant's ward.  Pray for me!  Children are precious, and they should be kept safe.  God works in mysterious ways!  I wasn't sure
what I should do about my next move until God put me in the right place, at the right time.  Amen!!!

Hello Regina,

You sound very serious about wanting to physically protect children, and I will pray that GOD'S Will be done in the work you are considering. We didn't think a lot about the physical protection of our children when we were talking about this thread, but physical protection would certainly be a very important priority.

Our primary thinking regarded spiritual training, and raising our children in a way that they would be prepared to resist the devil. There are examples all around us these days where the devil completely devoured our young people with dope, gangs, sex, violence, crime, and just about anything bad you can think of. These are increasingly hard and evil times for children to grow up. This world is a hard and evil place for Christians to live in. Kidnapping and other bad things done to children are definitely examples of things were must guard against. We could have thought about this area and many more, but our primary thoughts regarded raising a child in the ways of the LORD and preparing him or her for spiritual warfare. Being strong in the LORD is obviously one of our highest priorities with our children. The interesting discussions pertain to how Christian parents accomplish this task. We can't just sit back, relax, and think that GOD will take care of everything for us. Prayer for our children is part of our work, but we should all know that properly raising children requires a lot of work on our part.

The ultimate responsibility for raising children rests with the parents - not schools, daycare centers, and babysitters. We were hoping that this thread would concentrate on many things that parents can do and should do in raising their children in the LORD. As an example, if a child learns how to curse from television before they learn how to recite a Bible Verse, the child is already on a dangerous path. A good question to ask might be when do we start telling our children about JESUS and reading Bible Stories to them? Their little minds are like sponges, and they soak up much more than what we think. Do we want them to soak up good things or bad things?

It's sure that a million questions will come up that have to be answered, and parents will bear the ultimate responsibility of answering those questions. Examples will always involve sex, violence, and all kinds of inappropriate media. I hate to compare a child to a computer, but it makes for a good illustration. A computer is only as good as the material put into it - garbage in will always equal garbage out. Our children are much the same way. The opposite is also true - good input equals good output. Most Christian parents already know this, but there might be some confusion about when to start and how to do various things. That, I hope, is going to be the nuts and bolts of this thread - Christian parents and grandparents sharing with each other.

Love In Christ,
Tom

Romans 6:10-14 NASB  For the death that He died, He died to sin once for all; but the life that He lives, He lives to God. Even so consider yourselves to be dead to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus. Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its lusts, and do not go on presenting the members of your body to sin as instruments of unrighteousness; but present yourselves to God as those alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness to God. For sin shall not be master over you, for you are not under law but under grace.

Brothers and Sisters,

Please see a poll titled "When should we tell our children about JESUS?" in this same area. Maybe this first question will help us get on track and give us a good start in this discussion.

The training of children certainly should begin at the earliest opportunity. I'm afraid I'm not one who knows a lot about speaking and singing to them in the womb so I won't comment on that but, I hope to show you by example How important it is for us as Christian parents to take responsibility ofr our children's education at the earliest moment possible. Don't be hoodwinked by others who tell you your children will be disadvantaged.

First of all I would like to say how important it is for dad to be involved in a child's life. Dad, you're their first hero. Don't let them down. I was 21 when my first son was born and I was busy. I left home 6.45 am 6 days a week and got home around 6.50. The advantage Paul had was when I left work to attend Bible College fully funded by my local church. Because of this, between the age of 1 and 3 (when we came to Australia) he had me at home and I spent considerable time with him. However, by the time he was 6 I was back working terribly long hours. From the age of 9 he worked with me just so he could be with me. Fortunately my employer didn't mind.

Daniel was born 16 years later and it is through him that I learned a lesson I wish I knew when Paul was born. My employment had changed meaning I could spend most days with Daniel and we played, learned and grew together. I was working 7 days a week without annual holidays but I was working early in the morning (usually home by 10 am) and only for about 3 - 4 hours.

Daniel never went to preschool, something most said would work against him when he started school. He is 10 now and, a couple of months ago one of his school friends asked him, "How come you're so clever if you didn't go to preschool?" So don't let the world force you into a mould you don't need to be in.

Because Daniel and I spent so much time together I had control of his learning and that meant I could teach him my faith - something noone else would do. We had fun together. If I could write you some of the silly rhymes I wrote about our experiences together I'm sure you would agree. I read to Daniel every night. When he was 3 Daniel threw me a challenge I wasn't sure I would cope with. He said, "Dad, instead of reading me a story tonight, how about telling me your own story - something you made up?" Who can say no to a wonderful son? So, with trepidation I began the story of Aussie Dan and his battle with Pollution (I will admit I kinda borrowed the plot from rpg's I had played on game consoles [see! They're not good for nothing.]). Aussie Dan left home to fight pollution and, to be successful he had to collect the armour of Ephesians 6 and six other companions so that he could see pollution defeated. On the way he learned to collect vials of prayer (for recovery); memory verses (for stamina); and praises to aid him in the battle (sort of like magic potions but not quite). Having travelled all over Australia discovering the weapons of our warfare and gaining the necessary companions he learned that, when the 7 friends released 7 different colour praises Creator (that's Jesus) came down and defeated the enemy for him and that is how they defeated Pollution in Sydney Australia. Can you see how much I was able to teach him in just one story? Mind you, that story continued for the next 3 years. After this Aussie Dan became Danyellow Goodfellow who had granny's adventure Bible through which he was drawn into the Bible and experienced the adventures first hand. This created a love for God's word. He still reads his Bible every night before he goes to bed.

Dan gave his heart to the Lord through one of granny's stories (that's my mum). We just love Granny Thalia's stories. I recorded tham onto a cd and, not only Daniel but his cousins Joshua and Jared as well. So granny (mum) had plenty of input too.

I fully realise that my time as Daniel's instructor is limited and I chose the best years - while he was only little. Today I still have more influence over him than any other parent in our community has over their child. Why? I believe it is because I was there for him when it counted.

I encourage you to downsize your dreams. That big house or large pension is not as important as that little soul God wants in heaven. I tell people my father led me to Jesus and, when he did he lost a son for this life and gained a brother for eternity. I am overjoyed to say both Paul and Daniel are my son - my brother. I let Paul down a little because other things were more important till too much time had been lost. I determined it would not be so with Daniel.

Love,

Kerry

AMEN Kerry - AMEN!

Thank you sincerely for the beautiful story and illustrations. It's a wonderful example about how our children love attention and really do enjoy listening to us. They really do understand much more than we think that they do when they are still unable to talk. They usually learn to start talking by copying some of the things that we say. Those stories and examples we set for them last their entire lives.

Their wonder and understanding increases as they get a little bit older, and we can usually know before they start talking that they understand quite a few things, some causing quite a surprise for us. I can't think of a better subject to start with than JESUS, our LORD and Saviour. We can use simple terms and try to explain things in a very basic way. We might even make a comparison about how daddy has a great Father in Heaven who loves them and watches over them. This is the truth, and it can be incorporated into many of the natural things that happen during childhood. As an example, many children will express fear of certain things - maybe the dark, noises, or any number of things. That's a perfect time to tell them how much you love them and how much their Heavenly Father loves them. It is a matter of wonder when you talk about someone who is much mightier and stronger than you are. They begin to trust you and take it for granted that you will love them, care for them, feed them, and take care of their needs. Again, this is a perfect time to tell them about a Heavenly Father who you trust to do the same thing for you. It is a matter of wonder when you point to the Heavens and tell your children where your Heavenly Father lives and how much He loves you. It sounds like you have done many things like this in the stories that you've told your children. As they learn to trust you, they can learn to trust the MIGHTY ONE that you trust. Just imagine what it means when you tell them the truth about who made the trees, the flowers, and all the things that they like to look at. It becomes natural that this trust grows, and the stories can become more and more elaborate.

It's wonderful if you have some really good Christian books for children that are illustrated. Many completely true stories from the Bible are fascinating, and it helps the children to start learning about the characters of the Bible, what they did, and how GOD helped them. Many people still like to teach children how to read their first words from Christian Story Books and the Bible. I agree and think this is a wonderful way to begin a child's education. Knowing about JESUS and having HIM as a foundation is a start that they will never forget. Children like the fact that there is a MIGHTY GOD who loves them very much. In fact, Love is one of the most important things that a small child can understand. Thankfully, most children are loved and they start their lives knowing that someone cares about them. The ultimate Love is the Love of JESUS, so what better way could we start?

Thanks for a beautiful post. I hope and pray that it encourages other parents and grandparents to share their experiences. We can all learn from each other. Along the way, we can also pray that GOD will help us and guide us in the care and training of a beautiful gift who belongs to GOD - Our Child. GOD has entrusted him or her to our care and nourishment. I'm just thinking about what an awesome responsibility that is. BUT, as you noted, it is also a matter of joy.

Love In Christ,
Tom

2 Corinthians 5:5-8 NASB  Now He who prepared us for this very purpose is God, who gave to us the Spirit as a pledge. Therefore, being always of good courage, and knowing that while we are at home in the body we are absent from the Lord -- for we walk by faith, not by sight -- we are of good courage, I say, and prefer rather to be absent from the body and to be at home with the Lord.

Another Amen Kerry.

It is never too early to start teaching our children and there never seems to be enough time but we do need to insure that we make that time. As was said, our children are a precious gift from God that has been entrusted in our care. God requires it of us to insure that we take care in bringing them up in the ways of the Lord.

 

I just want to add a thought about how parents (mostly moms since they are the ones who spend most time with the children) teach their children patiently and diligently, God too teaches us much in the same way. I am going to use the following illustration.

My 6 year old nephew showed up at my door one winter morning when the temperature was 17 degrees and all he had on besides his clothes was a sweater. I asked him "Anthony why aren't you wearing a coat?" He innocently answered "My mom said it was going to be very cold today and I should wear a sweater." Sometimes parents have to be very specific and mention word for word what it is that they want to tell their children because they don't really understand. Anthony was more than willing to obey my sister, but he did not completely understand. So it is with God He wants to get a message across to us and we have to delve in the Word so we don't miss any of His commands and His leadings.
If we have read the Bible from Genesis to Revelation, we will find that God often repeats the same thing to us in many Scriptures and in many different illustrations. Repetition is one way God teaches us in His Word. An illustration of this is the following: Every morning while getting my five year old son ready for school and my two year old daughter ready, I would tell my son, "Comb your hair," one day I forgot to tell him and he didn't, when we got to school and I took off his hat and coat his hair was a mess, I asked him, "Why didn't you comb your hair today?" He replied, "Because you didn't tell me to".
That is the way God is with us, He loves us so much that He repeats His instructions to us over and over again. But it is up to us to read His Word and follow His instructions.

Amen Sister Maria,

Fortunate children experience the love of their parents countless times in the first few years of their lives. This can be compared to the countless number of times that we experience the love of GOD. The presence and love of parents is made known to children, and so should the presence and love of GOD. I love to watch the eyes of little children light up as they begin to learn about JESUS and HIS Love. It is quite REAL, and they can soon begin to feel it for themselves.

Love In Christ,
Tom

Isaiah 54:13 NASB  "All your sons will be taught of the LORD; And the well-being of your sons will be great.

As I indicated in my posting on the poll for Clothing Our Children, I dedicated my son to the Lord while he was still in my womb.  I also talked to him daily and sang songs.  At the time, I wasn't quite convinced babies could actually hear or comprehend what was being said.  One day when my son was maybe 4 or 5, an old Perry Mason show was on TV.  When the theme song played, my son became excited and said, "Mommy, I know that song. I remember it from before I was born!"  I told him that no one remembers before they were born, but he was adamant.  I didn't know what to think.  Then I remembered that during my pregnancy while on complete bedrest, I used to watch old reruns of Perry Mason almost daily.  Coincidence?  One thing for sure, if he in fact could recall the Perry Mason theme song, he also heard my prayers.

I do agree that we are in the midst of a very insidious demonic attack, especially our youth.  They are being bombarded daily by sexually explicit and violent songs, movies and TV that serve only to corrupt and desensitize.  As Christian parents we must be vigilant in teaching our children the true word of God.  We must also protect them from the filth that is so prevalent in our world today, and dispel the lies they are being fed.  I scrutinize my son's music and movies.  His school (Christian) frequently invites guess speakers to discuss popular music and topics of interest with the students, and he has informed me of recording artists who are anti-Christian or have hidden messages that I wasn't aware of.  He told me the students were shocked when the speaker irrefutably demonstrated the subtle techniques being used.

     

Brother as I was switching channels yesterday looking for something half way decent to watch, I felt led to stop on a program called super nanny.

It was about a little girl who was so out of control that her parents ran out of patience with her. All I could thing the whole time I watched this was these little children need some HUGS!! They need to be listened to, they need to be shown what real love is not just being told what to do and punished and yelled at for not doing as told. As I watched these little children I felt they had never had a real hug, and just been held and felt loved and protected. Children are more willing to be obedient if they are shown love.

Faithin1 that is beautiful. I wish I would have done that when I was bearing children.

This all makes good reading. I hurt so much for the kids at Dan's school because most of them don't know the depths of love we talk of. Some are very jealous of Daniel simply because he gets hugs from his mum. Of course he's getting to that age when it can become very embarrassing for him but he welcomes them at home.

One day Dan asked me what a deacon was. What had happened was my dad and I were joking about something being the deacon's job. I pointed him to Acts where they chose men to take the load of work off the apostles shoulders and somehow we got talking about church structure that there were pastors, elders and deacons.
"So, which one can I be?" he asked (he was 8 at the time).

"Well," I replied jokingly, "Grandpuff is the pastor and, since I do that kind of work in the church I suppose I would be the elder, so you'll have to be the deacon."

"What does the deacon do?" he continued.

Again I was pulling his leg and answered, "All the work."

You will not find a more willing worker in the church. He often says, "I'd better do that because I'm the deacon."

I am so spoilt with the parents, wife and children God has given me that it is hard not to give continual thanks.

I tell you what, the things we teach our children often come back and teach us a thing or two as well.

To those who have added their stories I encourage, keep up the good work!

Love,

Kerry

What are some of the things that we can do to properly clothe our children?

We have discussed and agreed to the fact that our children need to be prayed for, that they need to be taught in the ways of the Lord. We have also discussed the need that they be protected from the evils of this world. What are some of the ways that we can accomplish this?

Hello Pastor Roger,

Brother, I thought that I might give some of our readers and users some ideas about where I hoped this discussion would eventually go:

1 - What kind of an example should we set before our children in what we do and what we say? Are our children really going to be greatly impacted with what we do and say in front of them?

2 - What more specific things should we be interested in teaching our children and when?

3 - Generally, what's more important - being buddies with our children or being parents to our children?

4 - What do we allow into our homes, and what do we kick out of our homes?

5 - Do we all have a need to evaluate public education and think very seriously about other alternatives?

6 - Does the list of worthy questions get larger and larger as our children grow older?

7 - Is real love by a parent letting a child have and do whatever they want to?

8 - Is a lot of money required for Christians to obtain various kinds of wholesome materials for their children?

I would like to partially answer the last question right now. There are tons of free materials for Christians to use. Christians Unite is an excellent example, both on the forum and in other areas of Christians Unite. All kinds of materials for various age groups are completely free for the taking.

Please take a look at ChristiansUnite KIDS at:

http://kids.christiansunite.com/

This is just a small example of what's freely available on just Christians Unite. I'm also happy to note that we have sermons and devotions for children of various ages on the forum for Christian parents to take and use. The sources and types of FREE Christian materials are almost without limit, so having a lot of money isn't an issue. Making the time to use the materials with your children is the issue, and this should be a priority for all Christian parents. It does involve some work on our part, but the work is fun and satisfying. In fact, is is part of our obligation to our children.

Love In Christ,
Tom

Romans 11:33 NASB  Oh, the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgments and unfathomable His ways!

Amen Brother Tom, these are all very important things and are what we as parents need to consider very seriously.

Amen.

Another thing parents ought to do is pray over their children everyday, and as their children leave for school they should speak words of wisdom and blessings over their children.

In my country it is a custom for children to ask their parents for their blessing as they leave the house and before going to bed. All of us grew up saying "Bendicion" which is Spanish for bless me. To this day, even as an adult when I speak to my aunts and uncles who are in their 80's and 90's I always say "Bendicion" when ever I see them or talk to them on the phone. The response is always may God bless you and be with you, may His face shine upon you. That is something that even my grandchildren have learned since they were babies and it will more than likely continue on through further generations.
We were taught not to be afraid to ask our parents and our elders for a blessing.

Hello Sister Maria,

I also pray for my children and grandchildren every day, but we have also taught them to pray. I was just thinking back to many of the prayers we got to listen to when they were very little. The blunt honesty of small children makes some of the prayers pretty funny, so you just have to bite your lip and laugh later.  ;)

We also prayed with them and gave them examples of how to pray and what to pray for. This involved teaching them how to pray for others and why. Most of their prayers are quite genuine, and we know that GOD loves to listen to the little ones. We do also.

Love In Christ,
Tom

Psalms 36:7 NASB  How precious is Your lovingkindness, O God! And the children of men take refuge in the shadow of Your wings.

Amen Brother Tom some of the prayers children say are quite humoruos, yet they are so innocent and filled with love and honesty that we know for sure God hears our children pray. Yes indeed it is very important for children to know that they have a God who care for them and about them, and loves them beyond measure. If our children are taught to pray from a very young age they will do so all their lives. Even toddlers follow the examples shown to them by their parents and do as they see their siblings do. It is one of the most precious gifts a parent can give their children. Teach them to pray.

I haven't  been online for the past few days (severe allergic reaction to penicillin) so I am just now rejoining this discussion.  My son's biological father has never really been a dad to him.  Praise God, there have been other Christian male role models for him, such as my dad,  2 of my 3 brothers, and other relatives and friends who show him love and spend time with him.  Being a single mother of a teenager is not easy, and I  constantly seek guidance from God.

In addition to raising him in a Christian environment, I feel it is imperative to raise him to respect women.  I firmly believe respect for women begins with a boy's respect for his mother.  If he does not respect his mother, he will not respect other women when he becomes a man.  I have never given my son a reason to disrespect me, and I have told him many times that he does not have to like me, but he will respect me.   Although I often joke around with him, I have made it very clear that I am not one of his buddies, I am his mother. 

Amen,sister. Parents and their children can have fun together and still have the parents being the authority figure. We can teach them how to be fair, polite and much more while we are having fun. When to have fun and when to be serious and to be responsible for ones actions at all times.

Hello Faithin1,

I was just thinking back to when I was growing up. Respect for Mother was a high priority in our home. Disrespect, especially to Mother, always resulted in the board of education being applied to the seat of learning.   ;)

I taught my children the same way, and my grandchildren are being taught the same way. We have a breakdown of our homes and society when there is disrespect for the first authority figures in the home. If there is disrespect at home, how can we expect our children to treat teachers, other authority figures, and the law of the land. I must mention here that SOME parents don't deserve or earn respect from their children, and the parents themselves actually program their children to lose in many different ways. I can think of many examples, but I'll just mention the parents being doped up, daddy being a thief and dope dealer, and momma being a prostitute. What can we really expect from children growing up in an environment like this? Overcoming a beginning like this is a huge challenge for the children, and many never do. The only thing worthy of respect that they might learn could involve guns, knives, fists, and fear. They really don't understand the term "respect", and how could we expect them to?

In the hard cases, we can begin to understand the value of churches, Christians who serve in youth activities, the Boy Scouts, Christian Youth Programs from the YMCA and the Salvation Army, sports programs with Godly coaches, and many other worthy activities that Christians are known to volunteer for in large numbers. Drugs and many other of the devil's devices have robbed millions of children of decent parents. It's a true statement that our own neighborhoods and cities are NOW an important mission field for Christians. The devil has been very busy in our so-called civilized societies, and he is devouring homes on every block in our part of the world. There is a huge amount of work for every Christian to do.

May we all yield to GOD'S Will and do the work he has planned for all of us. May GOD give all of us the strength and guidance to do HIS Will until JESUS comes to take us home.

Love In Christ,
Tom

Ephesians 6:1-4 NASB  Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. HONOR YOUR FATHER AND MOTHER (which is the first commandment with a promise), SO THAT IT MAY BE WELL WITH YOU, AND THAT YOU MAY LIVE LONG ON THE EARTH. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Hello Faithin1, I pray you are feeling better now, I am sorry to hear your were ill. Please don't take penicillin again.

You know my youngest daughter is allergic to 7 different types of antibiotics, penicillin is one of them. Because of this the doctor had to give her an allergy test before prescribing any antibiotics.

This is another way that parent clothe their children, by the time my daughter was 8 years old she could name each of the antibiotics she is allergic to, that is because I taught them early in life important facts they needed to know about themselves and the family. They all knew what medicines they could or could not take, they also knew their blood type as well as each others blood type and my blood type. Little things like these were not neglected when my children and I gathered around the dinner table, because I was a single parent and most of the time my 2 older ones had to baby sit the 2 younger ones they were prepared on how to deal with almost anything. I taught them how to do CPR on infants and on adults, I also taught them how to do the Heimlich maneuver on each other and on themselves. I was going to school for LPN and I worked at a nursing home as a licensed NA so I was able to teach them these things.

It is important for parents to teach their children many thing without alarming them, but teach them and teach them well, this way they learn early in life that they are important not just to me but to their maker, Jesus Christ. I also taught my children not to fear, I taught them that Jesus was always by their side and all they had to do was call on Him. One night I heard my son calling loudly "Jesus, Jesus", I woke up and ran to his room he told me he was having a bad dream, and he remembered I told him to call on Jesus whenever he was afraid. It is a blessing to be able to teach your children when they are still young and willing to listen to their parents trusting in them fully.

When children are not taught while they are still young, they get to their adolescent years where they think that they and their friends know everything.

I believe in being honest with our children. I was told, having told my children if I did anything wrong that they were to tell me I had done wrong that I was making a rod for my back and that my children would be disrespectful. What I said to them was, "If its wrong for you, it's wrong for me."

I have not found it to be arduous, neither have my children been disrespectful. In fact, I have the respect of both my sons and Paul, my oldest, when going through the lowest moment of his life [I had taught him not to drink alcohol and avoid cavorting in worldly pleasures but, others: "leaders in the Church" had instructed him otherwise so that he disobeyed me] would contend with others, "My dad is right!"

I think the greater risk is when we have one rule for them and another for ourselves. This encourages rebellion and disrespect so I always encourage, "Take the same risk I did, its worth it."

Love,

Kerry.

Hello Brother Kerry,

Sadly, our children are surrounded with conflict every day. It's a confusing world for them, and we can either reduce that confusion or add to it. You made some excellent points. Obvious hypocrisy on our part is a bad mistake. We should simply own our errors and tell our children that we were wrong. I know that all loving parents make mistakes, regardless of how hard we try. We must be willing to admit our mistakes before we can expect them to. Regarding my church teaching my children to drink and carouse, that would only happen once and we would be attending a different church.

Love In Christ,
Tom

2 Corinthians 9:8 NASB  And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed;

Hello, Tom,

I hope you don't mind, I prefer to avoid titles altogether although I think that 'brother' is best since it puts us on equal footing.

Thank you for the encouragement. It was not the church I attend that made this error but, as we live in a small country town we were trying to work together with the other churches in reaching the youth. It was their leaders who caused the confusion and is one reason I don't get involved in ecumenical outreaches any more. They asked for my youngest son to go to their kids club and I said, "No."

It is sad that we have to divide ourselves from those who are unruly but it is absolutely necessary for our children.

Love,

Kerry.

Hello Kerry,

Whatever you prefer in terms of "Brother" is fine with me. I was a police officer for 25 years and called every name in the book. Just for the record, I don't use the terms "Brother or Sister" as titles, rather as positional relationships in JESUS CHRIST, but I understand completely. Please forgive me if I slip and forget from time to time.

Reference the actions of the church organization you spoke of, they would be out of business where I live. Most would consider where I live to be medium sized. We are tied directly to an Army Base and have an overall population of probably 140 to 150 thousand people. It does go up and down with various training cycles and deployments from the base. Our area would be considered to be pretty conservative, but we do have bars and clubs in our city. I would also say that most of our churches are pretty old fashioned and fundamental. I'm not hinting that we don't have our share of problems.

Love In Christ,
Tom

Psalms 51:10 NASB  Create in me a clean heart, O God, And renew a steadfast spirit within me.

Brothers and Sisters, it is sometimes hard for us to call each other Brothers or Sisters especially since we have never even seen each other, but we know in our hearts that our Father in Heaven loves each one of us with  the deepest love any one of us could ever imagine. I know that since I have been a member of CU I have grown to love those Brothers and Sisters in Christ that I have constant fellowship on the forum with even if I have never seen them. That is truly God's Love upon us, as Jesus said we shall be known by the love we have for each other.

My own carnal brothers and sister call each other my brother or my sister, I think this really shows so much love.

A very good way to teach our children is to love our own siblings, and to put them before ourselves, that is one thing I thank my mom and dad for, now that they are both in heaven, I thank God that my parents taught us very young to  have respect for one another and to continue to stay together and care for each other.

They too were very close to my aunts and uncles, whom we now look up to as our guides, I know that I can go to my aunts and uncles at anytime and ask for their advice and I know that they love me they have been a sort of substitute for my parents. My aunts and uncles are very old they are in the 80's and 90's, the love I have for them and they have for me has spilled over to my husband and my step daughters, whom they don't even consider step  to my aunts and uncle they are my children and they have adopted them as their own nieces, this is another way our children learn, they see the love and respect that we have for our elders and they follow in our footsteps. Children learn by example.

What a wonderful way to teach them.  ;)
By our actions!!

This week I got a rapid reminder about proper clothing in the natural. I have
lived in Arkansas for the last 25 years, but my home state is Ohio.  It has been
my sad duty this week to return to Ohio and settle the estate of my father.

The weather conditions in Ohio are far different than those of Arkansas, and I
must consistantly be the "over protective " father with my 10 yr. old son.

On the bright side of this story, as soon as we arrived here in Ohio, one of the
first questions out of my son's mouth was: "where will we go to church?"
To me, both as a father, and as a minister, those were encouraging words.
There was a time in the not too distant past when I had to insist that his
siblings attend services.  My comment to them was to tell their friends they
had a drug problem!!!! Every time the doors were opened I drug them in!

I know that I have not always been the perfect father, or the perfect example
to my children, but proverbs has been proven true in my family at least.
"train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart
from it" Of the 9 children I have raised, only 1 is not saved.
I am waiting on him to return to the truth of the word . The bible promises that
our families will be saved. I know the word is true, thus my son will step into the
truth of that word.

I digress(surprize, surprize). Seeing that we meet the physical needs of our
children, and if possible, the children in our lives, is vital. Seeing that these
same children learn to cloth themselves in the righteousness of God is not only
vital...it is everything.  They are our future church--what are we teaching them.

yours in Jesus

ravenloche

I will be praying that the time for your sons return will not be long in coming.




Amen!

Amen Ravenloche I too am in agreement with you.

Brothers and Sisters, yesterday 14 year old came home and the first words out of her mouth were, "Mommy, I love you and I really appreciate you."  Immediately my defenses went up and I said, " I love you too sweetie, what do you want?" (is that normal?). She said "Nothing, I just want you to know." I gave her a hug and we went about getting dinner on the table. After dinner I went in the kitchen to help her out with the cleaning it was her day to do dishes. She said to me "Mom, you know why I told you I love you? Because on Saturday, my best friend's mom died, when I found out all I could think of was you, what would I do without you?" This bought tears to my eyes. When I think about the love I get from these 2 girls, I just want to melt. When they first came to live with me 8 years ago, they thought I was their enemy and they didn't even want to have a relationship with me, but love has bought us so close.  :) :)

Amen sister, that is better riches than any amount of gold and silver.

Indeed it is Brother Roger and even though I look forward to an empty nest again, I am very happy and blessed that God gave me the opportunity to make a difference in two very important children, who might otherwise have fallen through the cracks.

Somehow, I have a feeling my empty nest should be on wheels  ;D ;D
I already have 14 grandchildren, and it looks like my two girls will someday add to that number. Not to mention that my son has chosen not to have children yet.

Just last night my daughter called me from Colorado to tell me she is coming to stay for 2 weeks with her youngest so she could look for an apartment and a job. She wants to move closer to me.  :D

That is great news, sister. I will be praying that things go smoothly for her in this move and in job hunting.

Amen, thank you.