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LIFE AFTER DEATH:
>"DO YOU BELIEVE IN LIFE AFTER DEATH?" THE BOSS ASKED ONE OF HIS
>EMPLOYEES.
>"YES, OF COURSE SIR," THE NEW EMPLOYEE REPLIED.
>"WELL, THEN, THAT MAKES EVERYTHING JUST FINE," THE BOSS WENT ON.
"AFTER
>YOU LEFT EARLY YESTERDAY TO GO TO YOUR GRANDMOTHER'S FUNERAL, SHE
>STOPPED IN TO SEE YOU! "
>
>PALM SUNDAY:
>IT WAS PALM SUNDAY AND, BECAUSE OF A SORE THROAT, FIVE-YEAR-OLD JOHNNY
>STAYED HOME FROM CHURCH WITH A SITTER. WHEN THE FAMILY RETURNED HOME,
>THEY WERE CARRYING SEVERAL PALM BRANCHES. THE BOY ASKED WHAT THEY WERE
>FOR.
>"PEOPLE HELD THEM OVER JESUS' HEAD AS HE WALKED BY."
>"WOULDN'T YOU KNOW IT," THE BOY FUMED, "THE ONE SUNDAY I DON'T GO, HE
>SHOWS UP!"
>
>CHILDREN'S SERMON:
>ONE EASTER SUNDAY MORNING AS THE MINISTER WAS PREACHING THE CHILDREN'S
>SERMON, HE REACHED INTO HIS BAG OF PROPS AND PULLED OUT AN EGG. HE
>POINTED AT THE EGG AND ASKED THE CHILDREN, "WHAT'S IN HERE?" "I KNOW!"
>A
>LITTLE BOY
>EXCLAIMED. "PANTYHOSE!"
>
>FIRST TIME USHERS:
>A LITTLE BOY IN CHURCH FOR THE FIRST TIME WATCHED AS THE USHERS PASSED
>AROUND THE OFFERING PLATES.
>WHEN THEY CAME NEAR HIS PEW, THE BOY SAID LOUDLY, "DON'T PAY FOR ME
>DADDY.
>I'M UNDER FIVE."
>
>PRAYERS:
>THE SUNDAY SCHOOL TEACHER ASKED, "NOW, JOHNNY, TELL ME, DO YOU SAY
>PRAYERS BEFORE EATING?" "NO SIR," HE REPLIED, "WE DON'T HAVE TO, MY
MOM
>IS A GOOD COOK!"
>