What's your town/city like?

[faithgranny]

I live outside of Baltimore MD in Howard County.  It is a nice area but climbing much too fast on new homes.  Prices are very high to me here.  It is pretty much like a high tech - high class area. The one thing that gets me is there is still no place for teens to go for activities so they just "hang out" in the neighborhoods like I did when I was a teen.

[nChrist]

I live outside of Baltimore MD in Howard County.  It is a nice area but climbing much too fast on new homes.  Prices are very high to me here.  It is pretty much like a high tech - high class area. The one thing that gets me is there is still no place for teens to go for activities so they just "hang out" in the neighborhoods like I did when I was a teen.

Hello FaithGranny,

I think this subject would be an interesting discussion. I can't count the number of times that I heard similar statements like this in 25 years of police work. BUT, I also wanted to know what kind of places they wanted for teens.

Example:  Would this be paid for by churches, taxpayers, or who?

Example:  What type of activities are we talking about?

Example:  Who would supervise the activities and be responsible for any problems?

Example:  Do the schools, churches, and city already have activities?

Example:  If YES to above, are they used, supported, or not enough?

Example:  Were various things tried and stopped or failed for some reason?

Example:  If YES to above, what happened and why?
__________________________________________

I ask these questions because I know of many things that were tried and failed in my city. Our population would be around 140,000. We still have all kinds of activities that receive varying amounts of support from schools, churches, and civic type organizations. The ones that survived are clean, well-supervised, and well-funded. They would include many organizations that have been around for a long time (i.e. Boy Scouts, YMCA, FFA, a huge list of things associated with schools and churches, etc., etc., etc.) The ones that failed usually involved alcohol, drugs, sex, and/or violence. We must also remember that these are the days of many law suits for little or no reason.

So, what are some ideas and answers? I know that everyone has different opinions, so the ideas and possible answers might be interesting. The last question is also significant: are you willing to participate and volunteer? Are you willing to donate time and/or money to make it work? If so, for how long?

[faithgranny]

Hello blackeyedpeas

There are numerous things to do around town during the day for kids and teens.  But it seems to me that as it was when I was a teen out at night (10pm curfew) there was really no place to go and that is pretty much how it still is around here.  I know of many tried and failures myself so I do know how it is.

We have a couple of "gangs" on the rise out here.  Although "gangs" can be a dangerous bunch;  it is my oppinion that they, at one time, were looking for help.  I was in 2 gangs myself as a teenager and all we were looking for was someplace to go and socialize.  Without somewhere to go and someone who cared; we were chased constantly by the police and after a while it became our fun time a night.  We where really good kids and we could not go into any stores because of the clothes that we wore.  Our parents knew where we were most of the time (at least mine did) as well as most of the others.  Just like it is now and probably has always been; walk into a neighborhood and the police are called because there are too many of you.  I know their frustration and if they would bring something into the community i would volunteer.  you do have the bad ones who won't change but you do have the good ones too.

Does this make any sense to you.  I ask because sometimes my thoughts are one way and I express another so if it doesn't make sense pls tell me so.  Your knowledge about gangs would be greatly appreciated.

faithgranny

[islandboy]

I don't know much about gangs, so I will leave that to others to respond to. But I remember the things we did as teenagers that provided an outlet for all that pent-up energy. We had the local YMCA for swimming and basketball practice. There were  tennis courts and  bowling alleys, plenty of parks with swings and seesaws and a local theater with afternoon and evening movies. We didn't set at home in front of a computer, we read books or played board games on rainy days. Otherwise, we played baseball and in winter went ice skating or skiing or sledding down the alley ways. There was so many things we did with our parents we had little time to be bored or get in trouble. Not to say I didn't find some trouble, but the thing that held me back from getting into too much trouble was I had respect for my parents. I felt really bad during and after the times that I let them down. My father used to say "Your reputation is the most important thing you own, so don't ruin it".  I have kept his words with me all my life. Sometimes having something to do or not to do depends on the type of people you hang around with. I grew up in small towns, so I know big cities have other issues to deal within there  areas.

[Soldier4Christ]

the thing that held me back from getting into too much trouble was I had respect for my parents

There is the key difference. Respect not only for parents but for adults or anyone in a position of authority. Not only are they not taught to be respectful but in many cases they are being taught to be disrespectful. Many have never been taught what true family is, what love is and they go in search of that family, love and respect in all the wrong places.

Gangs are different than they were 30 to 50 years ago. They have become more prevalent even in the smaller city areas. They have become more involved in drugs and many of these drugs are much more dangerous. I deal with kids that are in gangs on a daily basis. Some are what is called gang wannabes but gangs have been moving in here within the last decade or so. Children as young as 4 or 5 are being recruited into these gangs and used to distribute illegal drugs, taught to steal bicycles, car stereos, cigarettes and much more.

It is not from a lack of things to do. There is a YWCA and YMCA here plus a Boys and Girls club that provides plenty of things to do that is free for kids of all ages and a place to hang out right up to a short time before curfew. There is plenty of parks here and even a fishing lagoon in the center of town. Several churches have joined in and provide free lunches for kids including teens and have organized activities such as baseball games, pizza parties and much more. This has slowed it down but not that much.

All this goes back to what you said,

at one time, were looking for help

To be more precise family and love.

The lack of Jesus in our society, children being taught that they are nothing more than an animal, single parents, broken marriages,  not having provided proper supervision and guidance.

[Rhys]

We live in a 40 year old mobile home out in the country on 5 acres of what was once my parents' farm. The place is paid for but property taxes keep going up. People keep building more and more "monster houses" in the area, which makes living in the area more expensive.

Public transportation is nonexistent and driving to everything is the only way to get there.

There is no cable TV or internet and we are too far from the exchange for DSL, so dial-up is the only way to get on unless you can afford satellite. The phone lines are so old that it is hard to keep a connection after rainstorms.

Rents in the area run $700 and up for two bedroom apartments.

Gasoline runs about $3.11 on the New York side of the border and $2.97 on the Vermont side. Guess where everyone buys their gas?

When we were kids we used to entertain ourselves in the woods and fields. We dammed the brook with sandbags and went swimming there - no one had their own pool then. Today more and more land has been bought up by rich city people and posted, and most of the kids seem to spend their time indoors in front of the TV or on the Internet anyway. If they do want to go out and do something, they seem to have to go to activities organized by others. There are fewer and fewer kids, too, as the population ages. Most of the young people leave the area to find jobs, while the NIMBYs keep out any company that might provide paying jobs and regulate the existing ones out of business. Affordable housing is nonexistent.

[Debp]

There is an organization in Los Angeles called Hola.  It was founded by a Christian and helps "at risk" kids.....meaning those that might possibly join gangs.  I don't know alot about it but do know they teach them art (even holding exhibitions for them to sell their art to wealthy people), drama and poetry....I think they have sports.  They also take them on some pretty nice trips like white water rafting, etc, since these kids have never been anywhere like that.  Also, they give them sandwiches for lunch...maybe only once or twice a week.   Being Los Angeles, they hold a big fund raiser each year....the tickets are really, really expensive and famous people attend it.  The kids attend it, too.

For smaller communities where there is nothing to do and probably not alot of money.....what about some church creating a  place for the kids to just hang out like an old-fashioned coffee house....maybe some of the kids can play music and entertain, plays games together, etc.  Just providing a place for them to meet with some activities is good.  Maybe a church has a spare room or dining hall for this?  Of course, you would need volunteers.

If the kids are interested in sports, does any church have a basketball court, etc, for them to use?  Again, with volunteers overseeing things.   Alot of kids like soccer these days....they might be interested in joining a soccer team....plus that's not too expensive to start, just need a soccer ball.

To give them something to do is important, I think.  Also, when they get around the Christian volunteers, this would make a difference, of course.  Someone to talk to about their problems as well.

[nChrist]

Brothers and Sisters,

This is an interesting discussion with a lot of good ideas and information. Before I forget, Faithgranny, everything you said made perfect sense. In fact, everyone made perfect sense.

The first thing that became apparent is every place is different, and every family is different. However, the kids are not that different until their overall environment impacts them - either in a positive or a negative way. They are the same in that they need love, care, belonging, and the necessities of life. We still have kids in this part of the world who go hungry and lack some of these basic necessities of life. I'm not talking about nice to have things, rather food, clothing, and basic care as a human being.

Family is definitely one of the most important factors effecting overall environment. The lack of love, care, and attention is what turns many kids into problem kids who might seek to solve their problems in gangs. Many of these so-called problem kids became problems because of neglect, abuse, and lack of proper role models in their homes. For a lot of these kids, being rich or poor is NOT the major ingredient that formed their problems over a period of years.

Brothers and Sisters, loving Christians can treat some of the symptoms of our diseased society, but it's very difficult to CURE a teen who has had a life of neglect and abuse. It's easy to give them food, clothes, and a temporary escape from the real root of their problems. However, they still go home to alcoholics, drug addicts, fighting, more neglect, more abuse, and a home that is broken in many ways.

We have watched the rapid moral erosion of our society and ways of life. Homes that are broken in many ways are now the norm, not the exception. Nearly every family now has examples of alcohol abuse and/or drug addiction. It might not be the immediate family, but it's at least close. There is a long list of examples that indicate our societies are broken and in bad NEED OF GOD. A BIG ONE: how many marriages DON'T end in divorce? How many families have a man and a woman serving as proper role models that children can respect and look up to? The lack of MONEY has very little to do with the root problems. In fact, MONEY might be the cause of many problems. For many people, getting MONEY is more important than loving and caring for their family.

The backbone of our societies used to be GOD-fearing people who were easy to respect, regardless of whether they were rich or poor. CHRIST was the head of the home, and children knew they were loved and cared for. In fact, there was no doubt. The things of the LORD were TAUGHT AND LIVED. People were happy in the order, structure, and guidance of the LORD. How many families like this are left now? Do we really need to wonder what happened? SO, here's the big question:  how many people have TURNED AWAY FROM GOD?

Brothers and Sisters, loving Christians should never give up or become discouraged. There is much we should do and can do, regardless of our health or wealth. The first thing we can do is serve as a proper role model for our own families. CHRIST should be the head of our homes FIRST, and we must take care of our responsibilities to our children and grandchildren. I'm talking about love, care, and the things of the LORD. For whatever reason, some folks think that throwing money at children takes care of all their responsibilities. We have many obligations to our family, and they should be done because of love and care - under the LORD.

There is no irony that those who raise their families under the LORD have love and care left over for others. The LORD enables us to do all good things. WITH HIM, many things are possible, including the salvage of so-called problem kids. Those so-called problem kids didn't start out that way. They had a lot of dedicated neglect and abuse over a period of years to get where they are. We can help them in may ways, but only the LORD can cure them.

Love In Christ,
Tom

Psalms 139:13-14 NASB  For You formed my inward parts; You wove me in my mother's womb.  I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well.

[faithgranny]

The first thing that became apparent is every place is different, and every family is different. However, the kids are not that different until their overall environment impacts them - either in a positive or a negative way. They are the same in that they need love, care, belonging, and the necessities of life. We still have kids in this part of the world who go hungry and lack some of these basic necessities of life. I'm not talking about nice to have things, rather food, clothing, and basic care as a human being.

Family is definitely one of the most important factors effecting overall environment. The lack of love, care, and attention is what turns many kids into problem kids who might seek to solve their problems in gangs. Many of these so-called problem kids became problems because of neglect, abuse, and lack of proper role models in their homes. For a lot of these kids, being rich or poor is NOT the major ingredient that formed their problems over a period of years.

Brothers and Sisters, loving Christians can treat some of the symptoms of our diseased society, but it's very difficult to CURE a teen who has had a life of neglect and abuse. It's easy to give them food, clothes, and a temporary escape from the real root of their problems. However, they still go home to alcoholics, drug addicts, fighting, more neglect, more abuse, and a home that is broken in many ways.

 In fact, MONEY might be the cause of many problems. For many people, getting MONEY is more important than loving and caring for their family.


I'm talking about love, care, and the things of the LORD. For whatever reason, some folks think that throwing money at children takes care of all their responsibilities. We have many obligations to our family, and they should be done because of love and care - under the LORD.[/b]

There is no irony that those who raise their families under the LORD have love and care left over for others. The LORD enables us to do all good things. WITH HIM, many things are possible, including the salvage of so-called problem kids. Those so-called problem kids didn't start out that way. They had a lot of dedicated neglect and abuse over a period of years to get where they are. We can help them in may ways, but only the LORD can cure them.


[/quote]

Thank you Tom - It is so true about our very own children in our very own states that are still lacking the basic necessities of life. And I do know some families that have very little but have a stong foundation in their homes with the children because they do place the LORD first and center in their lives. 

Then there are families that their isn't much of one to go home to; so to speak.  And yes also to the $$$ thingy because of lack of time or envolvement with the kids.  $$$ DOES NOT MAKE THINGS BETTER IF IT IS FOR THE WRONG REASON. How did that saying go "The more you make; the more you want - the more you can buy; the better you will feel".  NO, I know of no one who is happy and content with a lot of earthly riches.  Most are rather sad and lonely.   

So to me if you are just working on the kids; you don't know if you are really helping them until you know their families. And if you work with a family as a whole then there is a chance for change.  I know it is not always easy to work with a family. And Pastor Roger knows this better than I do; but one thing we can do for our youth in our cities is pray for them.  Pray everytime you see a group of kids hanging out on corners or anywhere.  You might be the closest person they have that really does care in way that they do not know.

Blessigns to All
Faithgranny

[Soldier4Christ]

but one thing we can do for our youth in our cities is pray for them

Amen. Prayer should be our first step in all things that we do.

[paulito]

Hi everyone; I'm new to forum and thought I would jump in here.

I don't mind if you know what city I live in, but I might let you guess it first.

It's big, and very multi-cultural.  A lot of people like to move away from here when they get the chance.  Local newspaper and others have uncovered a lot of corruption.  I personally think we are on the way to becoming a much better place to live!

We have either the worst, or near the worst, traffic in the entire nation.

There are many good and friendly people here.  A person's view of this city depends on what you want to focus on.  People here, like anywhere else, need the Lord.

[nChrist]

Hello Paulito,

WELCOME!

We have people from all over the world on the forum, so I think you'll need to give us a few more hints. Regardless, I sincerely hope that you enjoy Christians Unite. I'll offer a wild guess of Singapore.

Love In Christ,
Tom

Psalms 37:39-40 NASB  But the salvation of the righteous is from the LORD; He is their strength in time of trouble. The LORD helps them and delivers them; He delivers them from the wicked and saves them, Because they take refuge in Him.

[paulito]

Thanks for the welcome!  As time permits, I know I will enjoy the fellowship here.

I will put the city name in my profile.  "entire nation" = USA 

Have a blessed day.

[nChrist]

   You didn't say whether we could offer a second guess or not, but how about New York, N.Y. I've only been there a couple of times, and I liked it.

There are really quite a few places that come close to that description now.

[Soldier4Christ]

Hi Paul,

Welcome to Christians Unite.

Yes, there are a number of cities that meet that description now. I see from your profile though which one it is so I don't have to guess. 

I look forward to having some wonderful Christian fellowship with you.