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Our Lord Jesus Christ loves you.
286817 Posts in 27568 Topics by 3790 Members
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Author Topic: FREE CAT  (Read 3070 times)
Willowbirch
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« on: January 17, 2004, 01:23:34 PM »



Owner seeks peace and is willing to trade cat for either a goldfish, or a pet rock.

She will not come when called, but may show up at inopportune moments, and has a knack for opening doors.

She cannot remember if she is an indoor or outdoor pet, and will spend an entire afternoon trying to decide.

She will beg unabashedly at the table, but ignores anything she receives.

She refuses to jump in your lap, but will scare a sleeping person to death by launching onto their stomach.

She has no qualms about leaving small dead things on floor mats, steps and pillows.

She sees nothing wrong with bringing live rodents indoors.

She will lay motionless in the hall all day, only to tear suddenly through the house like an idiot.

She will disappear for hours, only to leap from under the bed and fix her teeth in an innocent human's ankle.

She has a special talent for leaving a trail of regurgitated catfood the length of a human foot.

She will chase large dogs out of the yard, but runs in terror from laundry baskets.

She finds fulfillment in frequently biting the hand that feeds her.

She will ignore her owner all day, until they are on the phone; then she will squall in a loud and insistent voice that travels over the airways.
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Kris777
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« Reply #1 on: January 17, 2004, 05:24:03 PM »

Sounds like the perfect pet for me! Smiley LOL
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Romans 10:9  "That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth thy Lord Jesus and believe in thy heart that God hath raised Him from the dead, thou shalt be saved."

Jesus is our first, last and only hope.  Without Him we would be nothing.
ollie
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« Reply #2 on: January 17, 2004, 05:28:04 PM »

One thing is for sure. That cat is normal.

 Grin
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Symphony
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« Reply #3 on: January 17, 2004, 09:21:49 PM »


That's for sure.  Cats are sick.   Undecided
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Kris777
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« Reply #4 on: January 17, 2004, 10:15:49 PM »

Hey, I love my kitty kitties.  I have four of them.  They listen better then our dog.  Only weird thing about one of my cats is that one of them likes to eat french fries, hamburgers and when she is upset she yells like a mountain lion.
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Romans 10:9  "That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth thy Lord Jesus and believe in thy heart that God hath raised Him from the dead, thou shalt be saved."

Jesus is our first, last and only hope.  Without Him we would be nothing.
Symphony
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« Reply #5 on: January 17, 2004, 10:25:38 PM »


when she is upset she yells like a mountain lion.


Poor, poor putty tat.  Dats just too bad.  Maybe
Snookem's would like us to take her in for some psychoanalysis.   Roll Eyes


   Grin


just kidding, kris77.  I have a cat.  But I definitely think they have it in for the human race.


    Embarrassed
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JudgeNot
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« Reply #6 on: January 18, 2004, 01:04:24 AM »

The Chinese will take her.  But you DON'T want to know why.  (But they SAY it tastes like chicken.)  Grin

Sorry.  Embarrassed

That was a cruel and unusual post - but my cat Bubba made me do it - he is chewing on my ankle as I type this reply.


OOOOUUUUCH!!!!!
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Kris777
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« Reply #7 on: January 18, 2004, 08:53:14 AM »

I heard that iguana's taste like chicken.  Don't hurt my Ba Ba cat.  Cry You can have Guanie.  Believe me, iguanas are worse then cats.  At times they can be nuttier then cats too. Smiley
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Romans 10:9  "That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth thy Lord Jesus and believe in thy heart that God hath raised Him from the dead, thou shalt be saved."

Jesus is our first, last and only hope.  Without Him we would be nothing.
countrycat
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« Reply #8 on: January 18, 2004, 05:14:41 PM »


I love catz! They live the life I often envy! Ignore the world, and rest whenever the mood strikes you! We have 2 inside cats, and 10 outside! And our Border Collie, also inside, Annie!

Cat'
Smiley
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countrycat, gittin' back to basics!!!
Whitehorse
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« Reply #9 on: January 18, 2004, 06:10:58 PM »

Hehe! Poor Willow. Why do cats do these things? Wink
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micahtexas
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« Reply #10 on: January 20, 2004, 04:13:22 PM »

<QUOTE>That's for sure.  Cats are sick.  

THeres a reason God made cats the way they are, no offense meant. I would want mine to kill a mouse if it was in my house. Wouldnt you?


[quote}
Hey, I love my kitty kitties.  I have four of them.  They listen better then our dog.  Only weird thing about one of my cats is that one of them likes to eat french fries, hamburgers and when she is upset she yells like a mountain lion.
Quote


I love mine too. Mine are indoor cats and try to have our food if they can. But they are pesty when your eating yours
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hi! Hope you have a few so that you can surf into my site.
http://www.geocities.com/bookofmicah
Willowbirch
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« Reply #11 on: January 21, 2004, 12:52:15 PM »



THeres a reason God made cats the way they are, no offense meant. I would want mine to kill a mouse if it was in my house. Wouldnt you?


To quote Ken Ham (creation evangelist - please imagine an Australian accent  Wink) "Its made to do what it does do, and it does do it very well, doesn't it!"
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"Man dreams and desires; God broods, and wills, and quickens."
Willowbirch
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He is risen! - He is risen indeed.


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« Reply #12 on: February 05, 2004, 02:27:23 PM »

Laughin' cat...turn the speakers on...

http://starterupsteve.servepics.com/swf/koty.html
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NateyCakes
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« Reply #13 on: February 05, 2004, 02:55:08 PM »

 ;DHehehhe! GREAT!!!
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Tibby
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« Reply #14 on: February 05, 2004, 03:08:44 PM »

Owner seeks peace and is willing to trade cat for either a goldfish, or a pet rock.

She will not come when called, but may show up at inopportune moments, and has a knack for opening doors.

She cannot remember if she is an indoor or outdoor pet, and will spend an entire afternoon trying to decide.

She will beg unabashedly at the table, but ignores anything she receives.

She refuses to jump in your lap, but will scare a sleeping person to death by launching onto their stomach.

She has no qualms about leaving small dead things on floor mats, steps and pillows.

She sees nothing wrong with bringing live rodents indoors.

She will lay motionless in the hall all day, only to tear suddenly through the house like an idiot.

She will disappear for hours, only to leap from under the bed and fix her teeth in an innocent human's ankle.

She has a special talent for leaving a trail of regurgitated catfood the length of a human foot.

She will chase large dogs out of the yard, but runs in terror from laundry baskets.

She finds fulfillment in frequently biting the hand that feeds her.

She will ignore her owner all day, until they are on the phone; then she will squall in a loud and insistent voice that travels over the airways.


I had a girlfriend like that once.  Grin
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Was there ever a time when Common sence was common?
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