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From the very beginning of my life, it was a mess. Even as a child, I was emotionally and verbally abused by men I looked up to.
I was so hurt, that it was all I knew. From a young age, I never knew that I could be rid of the never-ending pain: it was torture.

I had tried to run my life, but I just messed it up even more. As a teenager, I was abusive to other people, because that was
all I had been taught. I didn’t want to be, but I was. I didn’t know how to change, I didn’t know I could.

Even though I grew up with a Christian background, going to church every Sunday as a kid, I still didn’t understand.
I didn’t understand that Jesus loved me, no matter what I did. I was living in ignorance. I wanted to change, but for many years,
I tried to change myself. This just caused more hurt, and in the end I was worse off.

I gave my life to Jesus when I was twelve: it was on my first youth group camp. Although nothing changed straight away,
I still knew I had Jesus in my life. Eventually, the novelty wore off, and I gave up because I thought it was too hard.
Once again, I tried to run my own life, but I just messed it up again. Once again I was off the path that God wanted for me.
Up until the age of 16, I tried to run my own life. Many times during my teenage years, I had contemplated suicide.
I still held onto the hurt inside of me, and I wouldn’t let it go. At age 16, I recommitted my life to the Lord.
I was baptised on October 17th that year.

It is only since the beginning of 2002 that I have been able to let go of my past hurts, and it is only by the
grace of God that I made it through one of the hardest parts of my life. Without God, I am nothing; without Him,
I can do nothing. It is only because of God’s grace that I am not lying in a gutter. He saved me from
eternal debt to sin, by sending His Son Jesus Christ to die for me. Jesus took the debt of my wrong
doings on His shoulders; He took the blame, and died by being nailed to a cross.
This is why I wear a cross: to remind me of what He did for me.

I believe I have been called to be a messenger to God’s people.
To help people through the teaching of God’s word. I would not be the person I am today,
without going through the things that I did. Praise God for bringing me through!!!

God has blessed me in so many ways since then. I have learnt some exciting things.
One of the things I have learnt is that God delights in doing the things we would think of as being impossible.
I have done some things that I never thought I would ever be able to do in my whole life!
In me, God has achieved what I thought was impossible.
I actually said to someone once “I’m never going to be a writer; I’m not the writing type.”
Well, can you guess what God had me do? That’s it. He had me become a writer.

God delights in doing the impossible. Will you allow Him to do this for you, in your life?

P.S. I also have a webpage, with my writings on it.
WEBMASTER - http://www.foreverservingchrist.vze.com
ASSISTANT MANAGER - http://www.thce.vze.com

WOW. This post has made my day thanks :)
I’m glad you posted this today because I have had some big struggles and mistakes in my life and I’m a Christian well try to be. But God will never let go of you and I have noticed that when I fall away from God its hopeless I can’t go back. But the time comes when I’m in a humble state I need his help. And I feel the need of God so strong that nothing else is better than the grace and mercy of God,
Your post is a good testimony to people it shows that being a Christian isn’t all flowers in the air, you said that Many times during your teenage years you had contemplated suicide me too. There is a lot of wisdom in what you said and I think you should keep telling people for it tells the truth.

God has us all on a short leash doesn’t he
BTW Where in Australia do you live? I live in Melbourne victoria

GOD BLESS ;)

Thank you for your testimony!

Yeah. God is great! I live in Brisbane Australia, to answer your question!